Scared to make to right decision

[Wbby19]

I’ve always been on the fence about having children but thought I would more than likely have them. I got married last year and the pressure is now on to make the decision - especially being mid 30s. There is this overwhelming pressure - plus I’m under a consultant for a hip replacement after having dysplasia from birth - it’s deteriorated in the last 2 years which now is playing on my mind it could get more painful. The longer it takes for us to get pregnant which could be years, the risk my hip will deteriorate and if I have a replacement first that is delaying possible pregnancy for over a year or more too. I’m just so confused and the thought of having a baby , c section and then a hip replacement after just terrifies me. I’m debating not going through with it but I don’t want to have any regrets. Timing is just awful 😞 and my husband just doesn’t seem bothered to try and put some effort in to help me with the decision. He just says he will go with what I decide, but then doesn’t mention it. I’m not sure if anyone else has experienced similar?? I didn’t want a c section but I have no choice sadly.

No one can decide for you. Why are you on the fence? Just money and freedom concerns? Personally, I decided I wanted a family. Not just a baby, but a 10 year old, a teenager, an adult. I looked at my life and, while I was very comfortable, decided I have a lot of love and attention to give and I can’t wait to help them grow up and see what they get up to.

On the hip issue - what does your consultant say re pregnancy?

Your DH - does he want a child or not? He needs to give a straight answer. I would be wary of having a child with someone who is just doing it for your sake. Pregnancy has been brutal. Newborns are hard. You don't want someone who just goes "well you wanted this" and lets you deal with it on your own.