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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Boss being funny about sick leave during pregnancy.

14 replies

rennnie · 20/05/2024 15:00

I'm suffering with pregnancy related issues, signed off work. Boss wasn't pleased when i signed off. He simply said oh great- tell me when you're coming back. And ended the call. I was like okkkkk🥲 upset me but I got over it, was actually too sick to care.

Fast forward to today, boss has said to me to consider if I'm still suited to the role. He said all this over the phone and stupidly didn't record- he wouldn't say anything like this on email or text. Said that HR may have to get involved. I stated that it's pregnancy related sickness and shouldn't contribute to my normal absence record. He said yeah but you've been off for __ days now and it's effecting the company. Can't stop crying, he's such as arse. I don't know what to do. My partner just said ignore, rise above and go back in when you feel ready. But I'm such an anxious person, hate confrontation and I have to go back for another few months before I go on mat leave. I feel like he's going to make my life hell. I can't even report him because I've got no proof unless I record the next call and hope he says something 😖

OP posts:
AimeeLou84 · 20/05/2024 15:18

Speak to ACAS, we are really well protected at work when pregnant. I’ve had the same issues but I’ve already voiced in the office that I know my rights as a pregnant woman. I didn’t 🤣 Give them a call or read up on the Gov website. He sounds like a complete tool, bit like my boss!!

SouthwestSis · 20/05/2024 15:35

Document your recollection of the phone call, write down any exact wording you can remember, write down how it made you feel. Email this to yourself to start collecting evidence and then it has a time and date from today.

Talk to your trade union (join one if you don't yet have one!) Have a look at advice on Pregnant Then Screwed.

Keep documenting when your boss behaves like this and take advice on when you need to submit a formal complaint to your employer.

Pregnancy discrimination is illegal.

Bluebells81 · 20/05/2024 15:41

My advice from having been completely screwed over by my employer when pregnant and from also supporting other women in my office:

  1. Educate yourself on your rights. I've worked for numerous bosses who have no idea how to manage pregnant employees. They panic and their first reaction is to just try and make the 'problem' (you) go away.
  2. Be professional. Rise above any unprofessional or illegal comments and (try) to leave the emotion out of it. Write down all phone calls and save all emails.
  3. Try and maintain positive communications with your colleagues about work - show enthusiasm and interest about what is going on, even if you are a long way from physically going back to work.

Then... when you are back on your feet be aware of other pregnant women in the office and support them.

Blownaway23456 · 20/05/2024 18:13

I'm sorry, that's rubbish. You don't need this extra stress on top of being pregnant and feeling rubbish.

All the above posters have given good advice. I would also consider approaching HR yourself and flagging the call (keeping it factual) and then setting out how it has impacted you. I would put this in writing. I know HR departments can be variable but they need to be a lot more careful about this, and will know you are protected as a pregnant worker. I'd hope they could speak to your boss, so he doesn't continue with the threats.

Hope you get this sorted.

devildeepbluesea · 20/05/2024 18:14

All of the above. Also remind him of his duty to do a pregnancy risk assessment (and update / review it as your pregnancy progresses).

Babycatsmummy · 20/05/2024 18:25

I was in the same situation with my job and I work for the NHS!

I made sure I got myself a fit note from my GP stating " pregnancy related complications" ( I had bad sciatica and pelvic related issues so was off for 4 weeks in my 3rd trimester). My manager kept putting muscle related problems down as my sickness reason. I had to get my union rep involved and she was fantastic, HR were ok but I didn't find them very helpful, they just advised on policies and procedures.
My manager wanted me to get a letter from my GP as she said my sick note wasn't sufficient enough. My GP said he expected a written letter from them asking for a letter and there would also be a fee they'd have to pay. They quickly accepted my note as sufficient enough then!

Just make sure you know your rights, someone else on here and recommend ACAS and they are really good.

Hope you get supported and sorted Op xx

JassyRadlett · 20/05/2024 18:37

He definitely is an arse.

This is probably a good time for a shot across his bows. "Hi Mark, I was going over my notes from our call over and wanted to clarify a few points. You mentioned that you may need to get HR involved in my absence - can you confirm what the trigger for HR involvement would be, and what form that involvement would take?

"You also asked me to consider my whether I'm still suited for the role. I want to assure you that I remain committed to Company and to returning to the role when I recover."

Referring to your meeting notes is useful in case you need to fall back on them at a more formal point later on.

readyforroundthree · 20/05/2024 19:30

You've had some great advice here, although this sounds like an uneducated jobsworth of a manager rather than an issue with the whole company, unless you have raised this with HR before?
Your first point of contact should be an email to him in writing asking him to clarify the points he raised in the phone call. If you don't feel comfortable confronting him directly I would be inclined to go above him and complain that you feel he is discriminating against you because of your pregnancy and see what the outcome is. If it still goes unresolved then reach out to ACAS and take it further, but you are likely to have better 'evidence' if you try and resolve it within the workplace first. It's unlikely that HR has any idea he is behaving like this so I'm sure they would like the opportunity to resolve it and give him a lesson in the equality act.

Xur · 20/05/2024 19:35

Hello,
boss here.
My background: I run a whole depot, I manage both the office and the depot staff. Along with fleet. I’m educated and certified to boss degree and I’ve had personnel management training for managers.

What you should know:
number one-
All ladies should make a habit making the pregnancy notification in writing. Aka -email to your first line manager, CC HR if you have their email available. As soon as you’ve let your employer know of your pregnancy, your lawful, expectant mother’s protection kicks in. If your employer wants to get rid of you and they can prove that they were not aware of your pregnancy, then they can try sacking you for poor attendance or poor performance.

Number two-
If you have proof your employer is aware of your pregnancy, then the next thing to do is to yes, indeed, involve HR. Ask your boss to involve HE and provide you with a risk assessment. That risk assessment they are required to offer you, there is literally no legal or cheap way for them to sack a pregnant woman without a risk assessment. None.
In your risk assessment you need to note you suffer from nausea and poor wellbeing as a result of the pregnancy and it can affect your attendance, workload you can carry and amount of stress you can be exposed to. Meaning, your stress needs to be limited. Meaning, your boss should not be manipulating you the way he/she been doing.
My advice going forward-
Recording conversations- welllll, I tell you this…recording your boss might ruin your relationship with your EMPLOYER, the company. Your boss does not matter, your boss is manipulating you by saying what he/she says, they are inexperienced. Your boss already does not like you, but that does not matter, because at work people need to see past their personal preference. Especially bosses.

Your boss might get a warning for inappropriate handling or mismanagement for the way they speak to you or threatening you or manipulating you if you record and give it in, but it will also make the COMPANY distrust you. HR’s job is to protect the company, not you.

When you complete your risk assessment, they can offer you easier work or to work with someone else or in an another department for the duration of the pregnancy or until an another risk assessment, but without a finacial loss. Your employer is legally obliged to guarantee you a safe and secure working environment while you are pregnant. But they cannot sack you. If they cannot provide you with a safe working environment they should be placing you on a fully paid garden leave for the remainder of your pregnancy.

Doing that risk assessment will tie the hands of your mean and clueless boss, therefor protecting you. Once you note on it what needs noting your boss is literally prohibited from applying pressure to you or managing you on the back of your attendance or “suitability”.

good luck going forward!

Kiwi23 · 21/05/2024 07:35

He can’t sack you because of it so don’t stress once you feel better just go back to work try keep all documents of you medical notes and the messages of you sending them to him to prove your you have been granted it there is nothing he can do

ISeeTheLight · 21/05/2024 09:14

Please speak with Pregnant then Screwed, they have a free legal advice line.

rennnie · 21/05/2024 09:42

Hi everyone, so much great and reassuring advice, thank you so much! I think I was just having a bit of a wobble, in reality he can't do anything and I'm just acting professional and rising above!

Sent him an email this morning saying the following (slightly reworded for anonymity haha)

Hi ,

Just following up from our call yesterday. You mentioned HR needing to get involved due to my pregnancy related sickness. Could I just double check why this is the case as I was under the impression that I'd followed all procedures correctly and that pregnancy related illness does not contribute towards disciplinary action regarding absences? Is this correct or have I got the wrong information, please do let me know!

Also, you mentioned for me to think about whether I was still suited for the role due to my pregnancy sickness. I've had a think about it and I would most certainly say I am. Once I have recovered I will be fully committed to my role as I always have been.

I'll be in contact when I'm ready and well enough to resume. Could I also request that we do a pregnancy risk assessment when completing my back to work as I'm cautious that one hasn't been completed for me yet. Thanks.

Kindest regards,

Hasn't replied yet but I'm quite satisfied 😁

OP posts:
Xur · 21/05/2024 10:05

@rennnie
very good! Well done!👏🏻

Bluebys · 24/06/2024 23:08

How did you get on @rennnie?

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