I really don’t know where to start. I have never posted on here before and my spelling is not great I’m sorry.
i feel like life is out to get me.
I am 34f my partner is 40m, so far this year started out great I am 4 months pregnant with my first child my partners second he has a 9f from a previous relationship who I get on with all is good there. Her mother is another story I won’t get into as him and her do not get along and do not speak directly (long court battles), maybe I am just feeling emotional but everything seems to be going wrong.
My partner has a good job but I work around 40-80 hours a week long hours and on my feet because I have always looked after myself and struggle to let people help me. These last couple of weeks have been hard my gran was put in hospital because of a bad fall and they found brain cancer and was going down hill fast. My uncle was acting strangely and was put in hospital where they found rapid frontal lobal dementia so not good there. My parnter has been really stressed with his job and his daughter and where we are going to live (only a 2 bedroom house so we will have to move).
I only get two days off a week and it seems every day I either have an appointment or I am having to be busy helping my partner or helping other people (I’m so emotionally exhausted).
This past weekend we told my step daughter about the baby, she was excited but worried as her mother recently had another baby and we understand she has been pushed out abit at her mothers. Then on Sunday my gran died and it is all very sad but I understand she wasn’t going to get any better, then my partner finally rang the doctors after me nagging about pain he has had for a couple of weeks and now needs a lumbar puncture and they are worried about a bleed on the brain.
I then find out that my step daughter has told her mother about the baby which is fine but she has said it dose not matter as “it won’t be a real sibling” like her baby.
I have everyone telling me how this should be the best time of my life, how lucky I am, how excited I should be. All I am is sad I cry every night my partner is so stressed he dosent have time for me which I understand but it hurts.
I feel like my family is crumbling around me, at work everyone is talking to me about baby’s and baby things but at home there is nothing my partner dosent talk about it (even tho if asked he is excited) I have never felt more worried, scared and tired.
Also to note I have always had a problem with my weight and my partner knows this it has gotten worse since becoming pregnant and my partner is giving my nothing only “your pregnant what did you expect”.
Sorry for going on I just feel like life is out to get me at the moment and I don’t know how much more I can take.
i just needed someone to talk to.