hello .
I am totally blind and have been since birth, and I have a 5 year old DS.
I don't think i found early parenthood any harder because of my disability, but then as I have been blind since birth I don't know any different, so the way I do things has always been that way iyswim? There were some learning curves along the way though, e.g I went out and bought a fabulously easy (and hidiously expensive) to push/fold/steer travel system thinking I had it all covered. we could walk everywhere, and if I went into town and had to get a cab home I'd have a carseat too which I could then strap ds into the taxi in while I folded the rest of the buggy and off we'd go, only to discover that having a guide dog in one hand, and a buggy in the other really isn't the practical way to go. I never made it past my front door, instead I went out a week after ds was born and bought a sling, and progressed to a back carrier when ds grew out of that. There are some people who have harnasses made so they can pull a buggy behind them rather than push it, but tbh I was never comfortable with the idea of dragging my child behind me across roads and through (potentially closing) shop doors, so the sling ultimately worked best for me.
Also I came down to earth with a bump when I was unable to breastfeed and was faced with the reality of how to make up bottles without being able to touch the formula or the water, or the teats when you remove them from the steriliser. We had to develop a system which involved measuring cups, a funnel and a spatula for levelling the top of the scoop of formula. That worked well for me, although I found that getting dh to do it instead was a good way of keeping him involved .
There are advantages too. At night I was able to feed/change ds in the dark, which meant he never fully woke up, and generally went straight back to sleep when I put him back down, and learned the distinction between night and day very quickly.
Obviously there are things you learn as you go along. I found the hardest thing for me was letting ds go in a public place such as a park, and knowing that he could run anywhere and I couldn't see him. But ultimately the only way he would ever earn my trust was to let him go, so I had to do it. And of course there comes a time when children realize that mummy not being able to see has its advantages, and they do things they think you won't know because you can't see them doing it. .
But on the whole ds is very aware, he knows he can't just show me a picture and expect me to know what it is for example, and as a result he is very good at explaining things. Even his friends/other children who I come into contact with are a lot more aware and know that they, for instance, have to put something in my hand if they want me to look at it. I help out in reception once a week and although I do have the occasional child say to me "look at my picture", on the whole they have all gained immense awareness IMO.
I swore I would never make ds compensate for the fact I can't see, ie I would never ask him to do things for me just because i can't see (for instance I know a blind couple who bought their sighted dd a car for her 17th birthday, on the proviso that she drive them, and their blind friends, everywhere they wish to go whenever they wish), but I hope that me being blind wil mean ds will grow up with a greater awareness, and tolerance for the fact that not everyone is the same, and that not everyone does everything in the same way.
I do think that how a person copes does depend on their level of independence. I am fiercely independent, but I know people who aren't, and I do think that for them it would be more difficult.
Initially I would suggest that your friend should firstly insist on having a private room in the hospital. because navigating a ward when she's had a section and with a new baby will be a very daunting prospect.
Does she have a supportive dh?
Where does she live?
Sorry this is such a long post.
hth a bit.