Denied first midwife appointment

[BeachAndMountains]

Hello,
Has anyone experienced a midwife not continuing with a first appointment because they mentioned the potential for private maternity care? I am currently 10 weeks pregnant.
The midwife in question went a bit funny on the phone the previous day when I said I had a private reassurance scan.
Basically I mentioned private maternity care when discussing my private gastro care history and the possibility of it continuing going forward. I only went private initially because NHS gastroenterology discharged me years ago and wouldn’t refer me again when symptoms flared up in 2019. Once private I finally got a diagnosis of IBD. I tried to get a referral back in June last year, I finally saw them in October but they said they didn’t know what to do with me, sent me for tests and my next appointment was scheduled for September this year. So, I went running back to private gastro care again…
Anyway when this came up at the start of the midwife appointment, they didn’t even complete the paperwork and told me to make a decision by next week. I asked if I could wait until the 12 week scan to decide but was turned down. I am just a bit shocked really. I don’t think private maternity care starts until 12 weeks. The blood tests should be in or before week 10 I thought? Just want to be taken seriously and looked after with gastro disease.

@ASGIRC yes, some common sense

I haven’t said any different. Everyone is within their rights to use NHS care but you shouldn’t be frivolous with it just because it is care. If you can go private great as it frees up more NHS resources for those who are not able to. The midwife didn’t refuse treatment…she said get back to me once you know, bit of a difference. It may not be the OP’s ‘problem’ but part of being a considerate human being is not wasting people’s time and making them feel like the care they are giving you isn’t good enough. There was no point mentioning the private care it just makes you look like a dick.

I’m from a very working class background and have done well through construction hence being able to afford the private care if wanted, maybe my background just makes me a bit more aware of how I come across to people.

Sounds like you have already had a length chat … and may well be very disappointed with nhs care.

i have multiple health issues. After 13 years and uvf, Still only got the absolute minimum appointments with a midwife - booking in, 12 week scan at hospital so no midwife, 16 week apt, 20 week hospital scan, 24 week midwife …. No contact with community midwife between appointments.

sadly, our 3rd child had multiple health issues. Was constantly at hospital in hospital, I was in HDU etc, - they know when to give the time. Looking back at my precious attitude of my 1st pregnancy, I now realise how naive I was. So what you may think is an elegant issue needing more attention then the nhs offer, well they will decide.

I would agree with this, my third pregnancy was twins and because of type they were at risk of complications I was scanned every fortnight from 14 weeks. Regular monitoring, consultants appointments, the full works. When the NHS thinks it’s serious they are actually good. The thing is regular pregnancy gets not much input beyond blood test, two scans, a bit of measuring of tummy, urine and blood pressure as it progresses. Is it 9/10 appointments total these days?

Entirely disagree and it’s not her problem. We can’t opt out of NHS tax so NHS shouldn’t be “opting out” of providing universal care. My midwife didn’t give a monkeys about private sector and even encouraged private scans for gender reveal as NHS often do not want to look at it.
Midwives just like any health professionals are not to cherry pick who to look after. Your comment is arrogant and ignorant.

do Many people not realise that paying tax has nothing to do with any entitlement to the nhs?!

as a hcp I’ve heard the ‘I pay my taxes so I’ll have….. shite so many times, it’s arrogant and ignorant.

I’ll never forget the entitled twat who said ‘I pay my taxes’ and before I had a chance to stop myself ‘aye not enough of them’ slipped out of my mouth….

it was made even funnier when a colleague told me he’s been in court before for tax evasion/money laundering!!!!!

@Answersunknown

any ordinary resident in the UK has access to NHS healthcare providing they have a primary health need. People start paying their National Insurance as soon as they prove their residency via a registered address.
Having a free market allows people to change from national healthcare to private healthcare if they choose so.
Regardless of that, since the OP hasn’t made a decision yet, yet she has a need for the service due to blood work screening, booking in should not be denied based on the fact that she is still considering, because she literally legally can.

You are talking about specific situations and people, sorry you've had to deal with that as it really doesn't sound pleasant.

If you pay national insurance then you are paying for the NHS though, I don't understand why it is arrogant and ignorant to acknowledge that?

In addition, those who are able to afford private care are more likely to be funding a higher portion of the NHS than those who can't due to their higher incomes and taxes. What's the issue?

Irrespective of using private care, everyone is entitled to NHS care in the UK, I'm not aware of any exceptions (unless abusive to staff in certain settings maybe?). OP has every right to NHS care for her pregnancy.

Hi there, congratulations on your first pregnancy! Hope you're feeling well.
I think you may possibly be thinking a little much into this. It's very common for midwives to suggest delaying your booking appointment until you've come to a decision about your care pathway. It's doubling up on tests/education/paperwork/scans otherwise. As someone above said, private consultants book up ASAP so it's usually a case of book with them from the get go or else with the NHS from the get go. The midwife won't have personal feelings about your care pathway as it doesn't change her job one way or another. Just putting it bluntly - it's a lot of work to do a booking appointment where the info and results may never be relevant so she's leaving you time to decide. Then just get your care sorted in one place and can always bring your file to the NHS Hospital if you ever need to attend there.

Whatever you do decide it needs to make you feel comfortable, safe and supported. There really is no right or wrong so do what feels right for you.

cryinglaughing · 30/04/2024 17:09
You are better off in the NHS for maternity.”

This. Any problems during birth you’ll likely be transferred anyway. Most private hospitals don’t have the capacity for medical emergencies.

You really aren’t

OP I had both NHS and private maternity care with different pregnancies. I can’t tell you how much better private was. Not antenatal particularly although I had some private scans but the deliveries were about 15 worlds apart. You’re paying for the guarantee of a dedicated midwife you’ve already met with you throughout Labour and a consultant on hand for the delivery:

differences were: 3rd baby, I have short labours so arranged an induction I asked for

epidural pre induction - previously 1) and induction and no epidural because they couldn’t get someone to give it 2nd baby no epidural as the anaesthetist was busy

my labour was 100% pain free from start to finish

pregnancy no 1 & 2 episoiotmy with infections and terrible stitching and infections with conserve sore scar tissue. 3rd pregnancy, private, barely tore due to skill of consultant getting baby out. He then fixed all scar tissue and it’s perfect

Pregnancy 1&2 midwives too busy to help feeding. Both babies on formula at 2 weeks and 6 weeks and never fully BF. Baby 3 midwives helped establish breastfeeding by sitting with me for every feed. Baby fully BF for 6 months

at no point in labour was I left alone. I did not have to share a midwife. She didn’t have to deal with any other patients. This is what private pays for

This was Private wing of NHS hospital. Baby was an NHS patient and therefore would have had NHS neonatal care in the hospital he was born if needed

Ive always earmarked money for my DD to have private care when she has a baby

Can someone clarify please, when in the pregnancy is it deemed to be wasting the midwife’s time to change to private care? Would that be going for private birth, or say 24 to 28 weeks like someone mentioned above, or around 20 weeks?

Based on the experience on your first and second I would have gone private in this situation too. For me although my birth wasn’t good I don’t believe that the staff could have done anything differently. I was given an epidural pretty much immediately when requested and because I have a complicated labour I was in my own room where I pretty much got 24hour care from the midwives who were nothing short of amazing. My stitches are also pretty good and I had no issues afterwards. There is such a wide range of care in the NHS, going private as you say guarantees you will get your consultant and midwife. My point was to just make a decision as early as possible.

Hi,
what is stopping you from just going private straight away if you have the funds to do so? I don’t understand why you’re considering NHS if you feel the care you’ve had for for health hasn’t been good and you’ve accessed private care already?

After a poor experience in my first pregnancy, for the second I had private scan & bloods for the 12wk scan. This meant I didn’t book in with the NHS midwife until about 14wks or so. Apparently if I’d waited much longer it would have triggered concerns that I hadn’t registered for maternity care. As it was she just put the results in my notes & proceeded as normal. All the rest of my care was with NHS.

It is notable that with a second pregnancy you have less maternity appointments anyway.

How can any of it be wasting the midwife’s time? Each time you see them they are doing some combination of pee tests, blood pressure or blood tests. Checking you for signs of domestic abuse or poor mental health. And importantly checking the baby’s heart beat & growth.

It would only be a waste of resources if you were having private care at the same time.

Agree with this, I don't see the point in duplication of appointments.

There is value in every appointment irrespective of which midwife you see and how far along you are.

The early appointments are very impersonal and generic in my experience and you only start really planning for the birth around 24 weeks onwards, that's why I feel it's is a suitable time to switch. It's probably quite a personal decision though.

I am having private care from 34 weeks with a private midwife; alongside NHS. I am still giving birth in an NHS hospital setting, but a private midwife will accompany me. She knows me, will be dedicated to my care and can advocate for me. You can have both.

Shaken? Vulnerable? I hope for the poor midwife's sake you do go private