Childcare for eldest while in labour

[Orangepen13]

Due in 6 weeks and starting to think about childcare for our 2.5 year old while I’m in labour (eek!)

last time I had cholestasis and was induced, so we may well have some notice, but I was a fast labourer (2hours active!).

My mum loves about 2 hours away and could come but I really don’t want people staying in the days after the birth. We also have an amazing childminder who has offered (but feel we can only use her in the day) and have some good child free friends in the area who our daughter trusts (but they’ve never had her for a night)

How have others navigated childcare?

I would have a child free friend come when you’re in Labour, then have your mum take over as soon as she can get there.
when you know you’re coming home that day, I’d ask mum to drop dc at friends house nearby and she can head home.
that ways she’s driving home in the day time at a reasonable time, not driving late at night etc. 2 hours is completely reasonable drive then and there’s no need for her staying there any longer in those first few days
id then have dh go collect dc at some point that day once you and the baby are at home.
get everyone a bottle of wine and or flowers to say thank you and show how much you appreciate their help, and make sure you have dm round when you can. It depends what she’s like but if I spoke to my mum about that plan before hand and explained why she’d be ok about it. I know some mums would make a fuss though.

Called Mum just before 5am on first contraction. They are 2.5 hours away.
DH dialed 999 at 7.20. Mum turned up 7.25, paramedics at 7.26, and baby at 7.27.
Not recommended. Get something a bit closer, and be prepared to use them at 3am!

Oh, and Mum drove back home after cooking lunch.

I had a very good local friend who came when I went to hospital and then the in-laws came and stayed with DD overnight. I was only in for a few hours after I'd had DS.
Everyone went home once they'd had a look at him!

I would use your mum. If she only lives a couple hours away no reason she needs to stay for days.

But I would explain your feelings before she comes that you didn't want anyone staying for the days after the birth.

We had SIL 15 minutes away so she came over in the middle of the night and kipped on the sofa until morning. Took eldest to school, went to work, picked eldest after school and brought her home where we were snuggled up with new baby. She had cuddles and went home.

If you have a friend that could do something like this that worked brilliantly for us.

If your first Labour was only 2 hours it's really likely that your second Labour will be much faster - possibly less than an hour. My first Labour was 4 hours and second was only 1 hour (both from first twinge to birth), first was accidental homebirth and second was planned.

You haven't said that you are definitely getting induced this time so will you realistically have a chance to get to the hospital?
Added benefit of a homebirth is childcare is sorted too.
Obviously if you are getting induced then this isn't relevant but something to consider - my midwife said that second labours are often 1/3 to 1/2 the time of the first one.

2.7yo DD and I went shopping together for her special rucksack & PJs and put together a bag which had that, clothes for the next day and a couple of other bits and then I also had a bag for life which had some toddler cutlery, plastic crockery, a few books & toys and that sort of thing. Then I put together a few sheets of A4 setting out her routine (eg what days she went to nursery, what time drop off was, what she needed to take), useful numbers and also how our house worked. And we got a key safe and put a key in it.
My plan was that that covered all bases regardless of when I went into labour - whether it was the middle of the day on a day she was at nursery and a childfree friend would collect her and bring her back to ours and stay over, in the middle of the day on a non-nursery day when she'd be going to an NCT friend or in the middle of the night when a neighbour with school age DC would be kip at ours and then take DD to hers for breakfast & the school run before dropping her at nursery or, depending on the day, a friend's house. It also meant that if any of those plans fell through pretty much anyone could step in & look after DD.

I have sent my older children to stay with grandparents for the week. Hoping baby will be born before end of school
holidays. Does your Mum work? Is that an option?

These are all great ideas - I think it’s best to try and use my mum (although with an emergency local contact!) but see if she would understand not staying the night after we’re back. Thank you for reassuring me!