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Am I overthinking?

4 replies

Ships20 · 27/03/2024 05:31

First of I wouldn’t call my relationship with my SIL (husband’s brother’s wife) to be great. It’s ok we see them often etc….

I have had quite a rough last year: miscarriage with haemorrhage, brother with sepsis and cousin brother passing away this month. Not much emotional support from anyone. I guess my head is still slightly over the place.

Just 2 days ago we mentioned that I’m pregnant.
This was on the day of my 12 week scan.
My first pregnancy when we announced, BIL had a strop and this sil straight up said that ‘she’s offended’. This turned into drama.
This time as we didn’t show an ultrasound photo, sil and bil asked for it on separate occasions. It was the fact that it was asked on separate occasions that kind of rubbed me the wrong way. I just told my husband to send it in reply to my sil who had messaged asking for it.
Then my sil sees my husband who asks him how my morning sickness is: ‘does she have a lot of sickness or a little’?

My bil over the phone asks if we going to find out the gender. Last pregnancy he was offended as he was convinced we knew what we were having which was absolutely not true. He decided to post a video of a gender reveal when they had a second one but stopped the video at the ‘reveal’. Purpose of it being an indirect ‘we know the gender too but we are not telling you, just like you didn’t’. We didn’t find out the gender.

My question is that I don’t think there’s anything wrong with asking for an ultrasound photo though I wouldn’t ask myself, but it’s the fact that they’re like after it. All those questions seem normal but there’s so much focus on gender. Am I thinking too much about this?

I’m quite sensitive to this as I have far too much anxiety to even care about gender after my miscarriage.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
LeoTheLeopard · 27/03/2024 05:36

They sound nuts!

determinedtomakethiswork · 27/03/2024 05:58

Quite depressing to think of your in-laws being parents when they don't seem like adults.

Rosesanddaisies1 · 27/03/2024 12:29

They really need to get over this obsession with the SEX of the baby. It's only your and your partner's decision if you find out, and if you tell anyone. it's nothing to do with your family. "Gender" reveals are grim and unnecessary.

Pumpkindoodles · 27/03/2024 13:29

Let it go, it’s not a big deal, the rest of their behaviour is the issue
just see them and talk to them less of you can, they sound nuts

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