New mum in 40s

[Anne4678]

Hi, I found out for sure yesterday that I am pregnant after over a year of trying. I separated from my husband if 20 years, met a lovely man and we decided at then 45 to have a baby together. My partner had a reversal and after a year of trying it has finally happened. I am just wondering if there are any other older pregnant new mums like myself and how things are going in your journey. Do you have more scans and need any specific supplements in addition to folic acid? I will be seeing a midwife next week but I have so many questions buzzing around in my head.

I think they advised one week over instead of two.

Hi 👋 I'm 42 and currently 10 weeks with my unexpected new year surprise! This is baby number 4 and although not planned will be a welcome addition.

I've got my scan on 15th March but have had an early viability one and heart was merrily beating away so looking good. I've not been prescribed aspirin, midwife didn't say anything but I'm going to query that. I think the only real difference this time is that I've got to have a 'medical' with the obstetrician and will have a couple of extra scans towards the end.

The midwife did say though that she wouldn't recommend a home birth this time around as the risk of bleeding will be higher - my last 2 were both at home.

I had my LO when I was 41, she is 14 months now. Definitely more appointments.

They recommended I took aspirin but it made me sick, wasn't an issue so don't fret if you can't tolerate it.

They also recommended an induction at week 39. This took three days before they moved to emergency CS. If I have another one, I'll elect for a CS as it was quite stressful

Take calcium and vit d as well as your folic acid and just relax through it!

Can I join you? I'm 39 and pregnant with my first! So reassuring to read all your positive experiences!

Hi new joiners 👋🏼

@Charlie2121 that's great thanks for that. Sounds like you did absolutely brilliant with recovery. I'll not opt for one (I would if it was any other time of year but trust me to be due during the 8 busiest weeks of the year!)

@Hibernating80 I've heard they only let you go one week over now too. I'm due end of August so baby will either be youngest or oldest in its year!

Liking the idea of being induced early if I'm honest. Also just thinking, I bet carrying over the summer isn't the best feeling if we have a heatwave!

I had my youngest at 43. Didn't take aspirin nor was it mentioned at any point. I did some of my own research and decided to take a pregnancy supplement with folate, rather than folic acid. FA is the synthetic version of F.

I read Real Food for Pregnancy by Lily Nichols ( US registered dietician). Most of the NHS/government guidance on diet is outdated and incorrect (likewise in the US). There is also a book for GD if that's relevant.

Healthy pregnancy. Had an elective c section but that was due to complications in older child's birth. Actual birth and recovery great, but night wards hell so I needed to get out asap. Easier said than done! Obviously personal preference though.

Good luck 😊

How long is the stay in hospital if you've had a c section?

I think it really varies depending on the person and the trust. 2 nights probably expected, but I left after one second time round (had to leave without being properly discharged because everyone was just so busy and slow, but they understood). But you need your catheter removed and they like you to pass a certain amount of urine and possibly a poo. Others might want breastfeeding support or need treatment for mum or the baby.

I was desperate to get home both times, could not recommend the night wards to anyone, despite super care in the day.

My Mum was 45 the day after she had her last baby but it was number six.

I know they say don’t eat certain foods, it’s just all about an increase in food poisoning so just be sensible. So I would avoid soft cheese, pate and be sensible with leftovers.

I also have three friends who had children at 43 :)

Brilliant book, I learned so much from it, just wish had been available when had first baby years ago as the advice back then was just that baby would get anything it needed from your stores and basically don’t need to worry about what you eat 🤦🏻‍♀️ no advice back then on avoiding chemicals, stress etc either

Congratulations and please don’t be worried or offended at the doctor saying your special, it is very unusual to have a naturally conceived baby at the age of ?46 so you are exceptional and very ‘special’ you’ll no doubt have been aware of the additional risk factors but it was obviously meant to be and everyone will just be very happy for you and want to make sure your as well taken care of as possible. I’d say for maternity staff you are equivalent to being a twin or perhaps triplet mum. There are other mums who have babies at your age but to be honest most of them are donor/frozen eggs so that is quite different as the risk is a lot to do with age of the egg. I’m 44 and expecting and feel very reassured they are wanting to take extra care of us

I stayed in for just the 1 night after my C-section. In fact I was only in hospital for a total of about 30 hours as it was planned so no labour.

How's everyone getting on? I'm 15+2 and I've had my NIPT results today and all low risk 🥳 We're having a little girl 🩷

Aw that’s great news! I bet you’re feeling so relieved and happy. A little girl too, how lovely! xx

Just came across this thread and thought I'd join.
Turned 40 at the start of the year and am coming up to 9 weeks. Found out a few days after my 40th 😍
I have a 3 yr old already and sadly have had 3 losses over the last 6/7 months.
Am being Seen regularly at EPAU for scans and then will be consultant led.
Had my first midwife appointment yesterday and also saw heartbeat last week at my 7 1/2 week scan.
Am cautious due to my history ... but also starting to get a little bit excited about it all

Hi, thought I'd pop on too. I'm 43, and according to the early scan I had yesterday, am 7w5d. Saw a strong little heartbeat 💓

Already have one DS, who is nearly 6.

@JC084 Aw congratulations, how amazing it must have been to hear that little heartbeat 💓

i’m so sorry to hear about your losses. That’s heartbreaking.

it’s great that you’re being seen regularly. My first appointment is on Saturday 23rd March. I’ll be 8 + 2 by then. I’m counting down the days to then!!

Aw lovely!! I can’t wait for my first scan!

@Anne4678 thank you. It was such a relief - I sobbed at the poor lady doing the scan. They're seeing me fortnightly at the moment so at least I don't have too long to wait until the next one.
Not long until yours either! Congrats x

Thanks @Anne4678 🫶🏻

@JC084 sorry you've been through the miscarriages too. It's your time now I'm sure. Every week feels like such a milestone right!

@ludocris amazing! That relief when they say the little heart is beating away is just the best.

We've dared to buy a little outfit today and finally told parents- such a relief to be able to talk about it in real life.

I enjoyed reading all these comments. I am super excited and 13 weeks pregnant , age 47 (ivf).
Ive just started on 150mg aspirin but everything else seems pretty normal other than I was advised that I will probably be induced at 39 weeks. Just beginning to feel less nauseous.
Good luck ladies x

Congratulations!!! You must be so happy and excited. It’s a wonderful time.

Wonderful news @SarahJTin Is this your first ?

@SarahJTin congratulations!

It's funny you say that about being induced as I've just got back from my 20 week scan and consultant check and I asked him if it was possible if I could be induced at 39 weeks and he said it's perfectly fine and probably a good idea (I'm 44)

How are things coming along for you @Anne4678 ? Have you had your scan yet?

I sadly had an MC on the 2nd of April, It wasn’t to be. Xx
But, we’re trying again and if no success in the coming months, we’ve talked about IVF.