Feel bad for going on leave at 32 weeks pregnant?

[blueyavocado]

I can't help but compare myself to mothers that leave a few days or a week before there due date. I'm leaving work for a few weeks on AL at 32 weeks and starting my maternity leave at around 35 weeks.

I'm currently 28 weeks and struggling with the hour and 40 min commute , feeling really worn out but also aware there are ladies who plow through to the end .

When did you take your leave and what was the reasoning ?

This is probably a great time to have a good think about how everybody is different, every body is different and (listen up!) every baby is different. You cannot compare situations like this, because it's not a standard experience.

I'm 29 weeks and cycling the school run every day - well yay for me, but from 6-14 weeks I spent most of my time in bed exhausted while my kids watched waaaay too much tv. I could barely function.

Really though, brace yourself for how different babies are and do NOT compare your experience to anybody else's.

Your commute is horrific...
I worked from home and worked up until the end (like 39+0) in pregnancy 1 but honestly was doing low stress admin and it was COVID.

This pregnancy I was in 3 days a week despite an "easy commute" I have found much harder. I will prob go off at 37 weeks maybe 36

Please don't start comparing yourself to other mums. So many moving parts as other ladies mentioned. You do what is right for you and fk everyone else.

I am working til 37.5 with a week of annual leave and then starting my mat leave at 38.5. I'm due for my section on 39.2.

So many factors will influence your choice. Your job. Health. Location of work. Support network. Do what's right for you xx

Everyone’s circumstances are different. In my case I was allowed to work from home for the last month. I’m sure I would have taken maternity earlier had this not been the case.

I worked until 39 weeks, will try to do the same this time. I wanted to make sure I had more time with my DD, rather than sat at home. You just have to do what’s right for you.
You could always ask if work can make reasonable amendments to your working pattern so that you can perhaps go in later/home early when it’s less busy.
Do not feel guilty.

Thank you so much , I think I'll try and use the time to prepare and relax a bit

I have done a handover note and meeting with the person who is covering my Mat leave on my last day :)

It's horrific and costly, I think I'll look for something closer when on Mat leave

Thank you xx

I wanted to use as much leave after the birth as well. Left work at 35 weeks but it was twins so they got c-sectioned out at 37 +1 as per NICE guidelines. I would have had to have stopped work anyway, as within a week of leaving my legs and feet were so swollen l couldn’t drive. Some people on the twin Facebook group l was on started at 25 weeks or earlier which is madness

Don't feel bad at all, listen to your body. I wanted to go off at 38 weeks (full time, non clinical desk bound midwife). Occy health laughed at me and suggested 36 weeks. I declined and ended up with pre eclampsia and going off sick at 34 weeks 🤣 induced at 37+1, baby 4 and a half hours later.

With the best will in the world you can't plan when these little buggers will make their appearance, so I'd go as early as you can afford to.

I spent 34-37 weeks as an inpatient, miserable, on no sleep as was surrounded by inconsiderate arseholes on the antenatal ward.

Deffo get the rest while you can. Your commute sounds knackering!

I worked till 38 weeks on my first two. On my third I was old, worn out and emotional. It was painful to sit down all day. The GP signed me out sick at 32 weeks and it was just necessary.

I was made redundant but would have worked till I gave birth, if I was unwell or had issues i would have had time off of if needed too but what was the point sitting at home watching TV and just say around waiting?

Yes if I was unfit to work it would have been different

Do what’s best for you! Maternity leave is not just for caring for baby but for yourself too. First pregnancy I can’t recall when I left as it was brought forward due to pregnancy anxiety/stress due to multiple reduce movement episodes.Think it may have been Jan from part time role & carried on freelancing until as late as possible as easier to manage.Back to freelancing 8 weeks or so after having first.

This time took ‘early’ mat leave from part time role as of yesterday I’m 29 weeks today will carry on freelancing late as possible & return to it as soon as possible.

Make the most of it for yourself as your body will need the rest before labour & delivery too. Good luck!

I worked up until my waters broke - at 32 weeks.

Do what is best for you.

Take all the time you can if it doesn't affect anyone else, soon you'll never have any time so make the most of it!