Hi
We promised that we would share our journey on this site to give hope to others - only have good intentions.
Over the years we have suffered from 4 unexplained miscarriages. We had been trying since 2015 and we to say our mental health was deteriorating is under statement. The unexplained part was so troublesome for us. We couldn't understand why not - as we were both super healthy.
Our last miscarriage was at one of those very expensive and intense clinics in London. We spent more than 20k. We gave up and decided that was our last back in Sept 2022! Decided to concentrate on us - but a few months later we thought maybe we could try just one last time. A true final attempt but this time really focus on reducing the pressure/stress levels. We had the mentality that at least this would be the end of the journey regardless.
So we decided to try with a clinic in Essex that we used before. Considerably cheaper then the previous treatment. One of first scans was to see what our eggs were doing - it went horrific. We only had one viable egg and told that we should consider not going ahead. It was a 6% chance that would be successful.
We actually laughed at the time when told this - We had such a different mentality. It was amazing in a way - Maybe because we knew that after all these years we were at the end. The consultant said that she would leave us alone for a few mins to discuss and during that time we agree that we would risk it and go ahead. (The risk would be to lose the remaining money we had placed)
couple of weeks later we had our first positive test. We had been here many times before so didn't get our hopes up. We took each week as it came - really enjoying each week and didn't tell any of our friends and family! we got to about week 15/16 a stage we have never got to. Now it started to get real for us but still we relax and calm.. we are staring at our baby girl that we cant believe we have.
I really believe that our change in mindset really helped this time round and we were able to sleep more. My wife also kept off the internet this time around as there were so many conflicting bits of information which can cause panic.
We did have patches of blood, discharge, growth concerns but nothing gave us peace until we had a scan and heard the heart beat. The rest was just noise for us. Our baby didn't kick as much as we were expecting but every scan was fine. We always got it checked when we did have a concern - don't panic its out of your hands till your scan.
We have had only good intentions with this post so hopefully haven't offended anyone! Please don't lose hope and your mind!