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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Pregnant 5 months postpartum

19 replies

ThatMuggle · 08/12/2023 11:54

Hiya!
so this has come as a complete shock but i found out yesterday im 4-5 weeks pregnant. I’m currently 5 months postpartum having had a baby boy in July. I was on the contraceptive pill but due to a recent family bereavement, I can’t guarantee I took it everyday…clearly I didn’t! im just so shocked and worried. has anyone else had two babies so close together?

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HeidiHoe · 08/12/2023 12:00

Aww congratulations!

How are you feeling? Are you planning on having a 3rd?

I had all mine very close, not that close but I felt it was best to get it all over and done with in one period.
I wouldn't want to start over once mine were older.

It's hard work but can be really lovely!

HeidiHoe · 08/12/2023 12:00

Sorry I was asking about a third because if not you'll have a few years of madness and be done sort of thing!

MrsB2005 · 08/12/2023 12:03

Firstly, Congratulations!!

There is 11 months (bar a day) between my first two.

They are teenagers now, so fight daily like cat & dog BUT growing up they were so close, and from a parenting POV, they often napped together, bathed together and we could go to so many groups with both of them benefitting from it!

I found that alot easier than when I had my 3rd when they were both at school and I needed to be here, there and everywhere at a certain time - I found that quite stressful.

But, obviously everyone is different but looking back when the first two were little, I have nothing but fond memories.

ThatMuggle · 08/12/2023 12:04

I have a third! ha. I also have a 13 year old so it was a huge age gap as he has a different father x

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ThatMuggle · 08/12/2023 12:05

I’m due back to work in February after maternity leave so i guess that is worrying me loads too as i have no idea how i would tell them. I would only be back at work for 5 months before going on maternity leave again x

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HeidiHoe · 08/12/2023 12:06

Oh wow, even crazier then but you'll be fine. Once baby arrives you just forget what life was like before 😂

Start stocking up on nappies

MrsB2005 · 08/12/2023 12:06

Oh bless you!!

Im expecting #4, and my youngest is now 11!

Honestly though, two close together is so lovely - they grow up together!

ThatMuggle · 08/12/2023 12:08

@MrsB2005 aaah congratulations! how far gone are you? x

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ThatMuggle · 08/12/2023 12:08

@HeidiHoe im just worried it’s going to be a lot harder than I can imagine ha x

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MrsB2005 · 08/12/2023 12:10

16 weeks - its definitely a shock to the system!

I feel so "old" in comparison to last time and am worrying so much more! And am generally struggling more that I remember with the others.

MrsB2005 · 08/12/2023 12:14

@ThatMuggle worried in what way?

Happy to answer any question's, based on our personal experiences if that helps x

ThatMuggle · 08/12/2023 12:15

@MrsB2005 i can relate to that as I really struggled having my 5 month old after a 13 year age gap between him and my eldest. I think it can be really hard going back to baby who is completely reliant upon us as my 13 year old is so self sufficient and incredibly grown up being the only child for so long x

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ThatMuggle · 08/12/2023 12:17

@HeidiHoe worried that two young children will need all of my attention that I won’t be able to split equally. I don’t want either of them to grow up feeling like they didn’t have enough of me if that makes sense. also that I will struggle going back to work after having this baby as childcare for two children is stupidly expensive. the nursery my 5 month old is going to in February costs £60 a day! and with all my family/husbands family working, both babies will have to go to daycare for me to return to work xx

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MrsB2005 · 08/12/2023 12:18

That's what worries me, I feel like I'm "set in my ways" now, and we have our routines etc and a baby is going to change all that and I can see some positives but spend alot of time worrying about the negative impacts on not just me, but us all as a family!

My husband refuses to see any negatives and says its what we want so it will be fine - my biggest worry is the others feeling pushed out when the baby will demand so much of my attention and things like helping with homework / exams with a baby screaming ...

ThatMuggle · 08/12/2023 12:22

@MrsB2005 it is a huge change. i can’t just run to the shops anymore as there’s a baby to get ready and a pram to put up ha. but there’s so many lovely things and they outweigh the big change of lifestyle. my 13 year old absolutely loves him and is always playing with him which does free up some time to get other chores done (my baby is quite an unsettled one although he is getting better) Do you know what you are having? xx

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yikesanotherbooboo · 08/12/2023 12:26

I think close together is easier in many ways as they do the same as each other and can play with each other.The obvious drawback is making the costs work.
We were in the lucky position I suppose that I could be at home while DH was in a training position at work. We moved across the country twice in the nearly two years from when I took mat leave originally and the fact that I was at home meant that DH could do onerous on call hours and shifts without worrying about picking up babies or which of us was going to be where when.It would have been a very different scenario if eg we had had a big mortgage.

MrsB2005 · 08/12/2023 12:28

@ThatMuggle It's likely that #2, wont remember a time without #3. My eldest cant remember anything we did without his little brother there. I get the dividing your attention but honestly I believe it will be easier with the smaller age gap, as you can do things with 1 if the other is sleeping etc.
The only "negative" I remember was the mum guilt that I didnt cuddle #2 half as much as #1 as I would feed / settle especially in the early days then go to play with #1 and if they were both napping it was usually time to do housework.
#2 has always been happy to settle to bed on his own / never wanted to come in with us whereas the other 2 would often want to sleep in our bed / get out 100 x before settling to sleep - whether thats because he learnt to settle more as a baby due to our circumstances we will never know - but as a teen he is by far the "easiest"

I cant help with the financial aspect as I was a SAHM when they were small, as we wouldnt of been any better off, after childcare costs. But I know some people return more for their identity as a person other than just mummy.

I'm sure, you will work it out and in years to come wonder why you ever "stressed" over certain things.

MrsB2005 · 08/12/2023 12:30

@ThatMuggle I dont know what I'm having and wont be finding out - I've always wanted a surprise but my husband has always wanted to find out so we did with the others but hes happy for a surprise this time.

justanothermanicmonday1 · 08/12/2023 18:15

Not that close, but my sister fell pregnant 8 weeks PP, and I 16 months PP. both planned. Sister was mental 🤣 blame it on the hormones.

I love having my girls so close in age as does my sister!

Congratulations

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