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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Losing sleep over epidural

59 replies

Mumwithqs · 08/12/2023 05:29

I've been awake since 4am worrying about giving birth and pain relief.

I had an antenatal class yesterday and they've unintentionally terrified me. Originally I was going to go with the flow and take whatever I need at the time, but the MW made having an epidural sound absolutely horrific.

She was strongly encouraging getting it early as there might be nobody available when you want it.
She said it increases the need for assisted birth.
She said it affects baby.
She said you need to stay completely still whilst it's administered, even though you'd be in a lot of pain.

I was already anxious about pain and tearing and now this has made it 10x worse. I'm not sure what type of advice I'm looking for but I'm really upset about it.

OP posts:
pancakesunday · 08/12/2023 05:42

I've had an epidural during labour and a spinal block for a C-section and both were fine. I honestly didn't really feel them doing either. It didn't hurt. I don't think it affected my baby in anyway and the relief after having it was amazing. People will always scaremonger

FlyingHighFlyingLow · 08/12/2023 05:42

Having had an epidural today while dilating from 3cm to 9cm in under 2 hours - yes you need to stay still. But you can have gas and air and they stopped while I was having a contraction. I was so well supported and I managed it, and 100% best decision I made.

I was given one as soon as I asked for it.

I did end up with a category 1 c section, but that was because baby positioned badly - i would NEVER have been able to push him out. At home we could have died. I could feel the need to push and the doctors said I was actually pushing very well and would have gotten him moving had he positioned right. But he wasn't and got severely distressed. Already having an epidural in made that process a lot easier.

I went in thinking I wanted to avoid an epidural, but I realised very quick I was going to need one and changed my mind. No one tried to put me off. It was done immediately.

Funderthighs · 08/12/2023 05:43

I had an Epidural with baby number two. It was definitely not in my plan but I had it as baby was “stuck”. It was amazing! If I’d been having a third baby, I’d definitely have had another one. There were no ill effects to my DD and having it administered was quick and easy. Please don’t be put off by other’s tales but make your own mind up. You don’t have to have one but don’t right it off. Hope this helps.

Iizzyb · 08/12/2023 05:59

I really wanted an active birth but ended up asking for an epidural and it was brilliant.

As pp said they stop whilst you're having a contraction and a junior doctor sort of hugged me to keep me still while the senior administered it.

Definitely would do again. DS was absolutely fine x

contactus · 08/12/2023 06:02

ooooh i loved my epidural and didn’t notice any recovery because… i was in bed holding baby for couple of hours after

all good

and for my second i would have loved one! but too late (20 mins after arrival i was holding my girl!)

TotalAbsenceOfImperialRaiment · 08/12/2023 06:09

Your midwife probably has an agenda. Some twaddle about pain being necessary to bond with your child. Ignore her.

Turniptracker · 08/12/2023 06:11

I had a bit of a meltdown during birth when they told me I'd have to stay still during an epidural because I was in so much pain it wasn't humanly possible. They then told me they could give me a numbing injection first to temporarily help with the contraction pain so they could do it. Literally no one ever mentioned this magic injection until I was crying thinking I could have the pain relief I needed. The epidural was such a huge relief and I gave birth with a second degree tear only

PurBal · 08/12/2023 06:17

I felt amazing having had an epidural with DC1, birth was really empowering. It failed with DC2 and whilst it was fine it wasn’t the serene experience I had first time around. I know very few people who has an assisted delivery so whilst there may be an increased likelihood it’s not a given. I had second degree tears with both (massive heads) but the recovery was fine, I barely knew I’d torn the first time and the second time I just felt a bit battered, recovery was quick. Yes you have to stay still but it’s not for long. Please try not to worry. But speak to midwife if you need reassurance.

whosaidtha · 08/12/2023 06:19

I had an epidural with induction. No need for extra assistance. I do recommend getting it early though. I had to wait over 2hrs as the anaesthetist was in surgery.
You do have to sit still but it doesn't take that long.

Rosiiee · 08/12/2023 06:35

I think most people have a great experience of epidurals. It was however not my experience. I didn’t get one with my first but laboured for almost 24 hrs after being induced with my second so eventually gave in and asked for an epi.

It hurt so bloody much getting it despite the numbing injection, it only worked on one side of my body so the anaesthesiologist had to come back and fiddle with it to try to fix it but it failed, eventually got a spinal block when I went on for a c-section.

Recovery wise I had pain in my epidural spot for months afterwards which isn’t as uncommon as they make it out to be apparently.

If I were to have a third I’d go without an epi but keep in mind more women have a positive experience of epidurals than negative ones! I could be one in one hundred!

WandaWonder · 08/12/2023 06:35

I had an epidural if I could bottle it I would

LunaandLily · 08/12/2023 06:36

Turniptracker · 08/12/2023 06:11

I had a bit of a meltdown during birth when they told me I'd have to stay still during an epidural because I was in so much pain it wasn't humanly possible. They then told me they could give me a numbing injection first to temporarily help with the contraction pain so they could do it. Literally no one ever mentioned this magic injection until I was crying thinking I could have the pain relief I needed. The epidural was such a huge relief and I gave birth with a second degree tear only

They didn’t tell you that a local anaesthetic is given before inserting the epidural?? The epidural needle is CHUNKY and everyone gets a local for it.

Leafysuburb · 08/12/2023 06:44

I've had several epidurals, some not for labour, I would ask for one with a button to control it during labour. During labour they saved me and babies as both DC were in distress and once I could calm down so did they

ZombieBoob · 08/12/2023 07:31

Epidural for my 4th here. 1st 3 was just gas and air but 4th was back to back and induction on the drip they set up the Epidural before the drip for me and it was a breeze. No assistance needed. I could feel when to push as near the end I stopped topping it up. I walked for a shower after. No back pains.

Original poster
Mumwithqs · 08/12/2023 07:33

Thanks everyone for the reassurance, it's good to hear that (nearly) all of you have had good experiences. I think you might be right @ about her having an agenda and I honestly don't know if I should complain about it or not as it's not nice to leave a class feeling so anxious.

OP posts:
NotExactlySuits · 08/12/2023 07:40

Everything she said is true and accurate. It's better to be honest than to downplay it. I don't think you can complain that the midwife was honest and open about what an epidural entails!

I had an epidural during my DS labour and it was amazing. I had to have it sited multiple times and it was still amazing. If you have an induction be very open minded to an epidural as the pain of an induction (on the drip) was unbearable otherwise to me.

Epidurals are amazing wonderful inventions that can greatly assist some labouring women. They're not without risk, they're not without possible side effects, they can result in more assisted births, you do have to sit still. I had nerve damage to my back afterwards which eventually went away. I still wouldn't change my decision to have one. Some women decide the downsides mean it isn't for them. That's the joy of modern medicine.

kersh33 · 08/12/2023 07:56

I'm glad you were able to get the reassurance you needed. If it helps any further, epidurals are routine where I live (France) and when I have birth I was the exception in declining one. I think the statistic is over 80% of births here and my midwife was very much about the pain not being something you have to go through if you don't want. I was supported in my choice and I knew I could always change my mind if needed. I hope your birth and the rest of your pregnancy go well!

Original poster
Mumwithqs · 08/12/2023 08:09

@NotExactlySuits I totally understand she had to pass on true information but her delivery genuinely felt awful, it didn't come with any reassurance just giving the facts. We were supposed to be there for 3 hours and she used about 1hr 20 minutes. I doubt there's any point saying anything as it's a free NHS course but I think I was just hoping for more.

OP posts:
shockeditellyou · 08/12/2023 08:15

I had two and they were both fabulous. Also your midwife is talking bollocks, epidurals are more likely when a birth is challenging, not the other way around.

and yes, it’s entirely possible for midwives to have an agenda. My epidurals transformed my births into enjoyable experiences, and in the first case having an epidural in place avoided the need for a section under GA (breech birth gone wrong)

TheWitche · 08/12/2023 08:20

Epidural with #1 and #3. #1 it stopped working when I was in transition so I went from relatively chilled out to horrific pain (as giving birth is), it was a shock to my system. They did manage to sort it out in the end though.
#2 just gas & air.
#3 induced so I decided to get an epidural. It was absolutely horrendous, I could feel the needle (?) travelling down my back. It was honestly such an awful pain, worse than the contractions. In the end it didn’t work much anyway - I could walk straight after giving birth and could feel everything.

I was obese for #3 which I think doesn’t help.

I don’t want to scare you but also want to be realistic that they aren’t all sunshine and flowers. Ultimately you will be fine, you will get through this whether you have one or not. If I ever had another baby, I wouldn’t get one.

Coco9910 · 08/12/2023 08:21

I had an epidural when they were putting me on the hormone drip and it allowed me to rest and get some sleep ahead of pushing (as I’d been awake like 30 hours by this point!) I was worried about having to stay still, but I just told them a contraction was coming and they would stop, and my partner was stood in front of me with the gas and air, so I could sit still and just breathe and then they would continue. It didn’t take too long to do. By the time it came to pushing the epidural had started to shift to one side and I could feel intense pressure on my right side but I ended up with a cat 1 c section after failed ventouse and forceps. But I don’t regret the epidural, it helped me massively at the time.

scrunch22 · 08/12/2023 08:30

NotExactlySuits · 08/12/2023 07:40

Everything she said is true and accurate. It's better to be honest than to downplay it. I don't think you can complain that the midwife was honest and open about what an epidural entails!

I had an epidural during my DS labour and it was amazing. I had to have it sited multiple times and it was still amazing. If you have an induction be very open minded to an epidural as the pain of an induction (on the drip) was unbearable otherwise to me.

Epidurals are amazing wonderful inventions that can greatly assist some labouring women. They're not without risk, they're not without possible side effects, they can result in more assisted births, you do have to sit still. I had nerve damage to my back afterwards which eventually went away. I still wouldn't change my decision to have one. Some women decide the downsides mean it isn't for them. That's the joy of modern medicine.

Purely out of interest because I'm in two minds over having one too- what impact do they have on the baby, how does it effect them?

Do you know if there's any evidence surrounding epidurals and assisted births? I've been trying to find some as this is one of my worries. The consultant knows this and he still advised one

Original poster
Mumwithqs · 08/12/2023 18:26

@scrunch22 I was told that the increased need for assisted birth was because (some?) Women are unable to push when they have that area completely numbed. I believe she said the effect on baby was that they could be drowsy and struggle to latch to feed.

OP posts:
laladoodoo · 08/12/2023 18:29

I had one and it was a godsend at that point.

Yes you have to stay still but they help you with that. Yes I needed forceps for a delivery but my midwife was able to guide me on when I was contracting to push.

To be honest there's lots about it that was crazy and traumatic, but it's childbirth! It's gonna be. It doesn't bother me now and I'd defo have another epidural again next time.

laladoodoo · 08/12/2023 18:29

If there is a next time obvs!