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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Private rooms vs wards

27 replies

MoonstoneGoddess · 06/12/2023 17:12

Wondering your opinions on your experience with private rooms vs ward ?
Would you recommend a private room ? I guess my worry is just wanting to have peace and quiet with baby after birth and worry there might be husbands other kids in the ward . I remember visiting my mum as a kid and it was noisy. Men can stay overnight in my ward and im feeling uncomfortable after having gave birth having to share this space with other men who I don't know. My friend had mentioned in past a noisy snoring husband kept her awake at night. There's only 1 bathroom and I really dislike the thought of sharing it with other women plus their men. Ive seen how other women treat public toilets are they are disgusting. Theres people who dont even put pads in bins. I think about getting up during night maybe urgently needing toilet and having to walk past rhen in my nightdress. If im breast feeding my baby ill have to keep pulling the curtains and i feel clausterphobic about the thoufht of having to keep a curtain close around me. Do you think I'm being daft? Only problem hospital with private ward, much convenient location but they are facing staff shortages and I'm worried what if theres a problem with me or baby

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tobyj · 06/12/2023 17:26

I've done both (because the hospital switched to all private rooms between my first and second child). I far preferred being on a ward. Yes, it was noisier, but I really valued having the nurses and midwives walking past frequently, so I could casually ask questions or for help if needed. I didn't want to have to ring a bell to summon someone. Both times I was in for three or four days (complications), so the experience was important - less so if you're only in for a few hours.

YouJustDoYou · 06/12/2023 17:29

I got given a private room when my first birth was an emergency c sec. It was a horrific experience, and looking back the private room was a god send. With my other births it was ward, and an absolute fucking nightmare, BUT only because of the bloody god damned men that were allowed to stay. We (mothers, babies) were just trying to sleep and ALL the fucking male partners allowed to stay were snoring blissfully, waking us all up with their fucking bear noises, not waking up when their poor partners needed help, they made it a shit, shit experience.

Crazykatie · 06/12/2023 17:34

Give me a ward pleeeese, I’ve had private rooms and you can feel very isolated

Giftsonthefireandlogsonthetree · 06/12/2023 19:44

With my first baby I had a private room simply because there was no room on the ward. Just had my second and spent a night on the ward. I'd recommend the room personally. Just bear in mind that there might not be a bathroom attached (mine didn't) and that if there are women who need it for medical reasons on the day you may not be able to have one

AngelAurora · 06/12/2023 19:50

We do not give side wards out to private patients, they are critically ill or dying patients, or those with an infectious disease.

I am curious why people assume they will get a private room just because you paid privately.

If you are using a private Labour/Post Natal ward then fair enough, but a NHS hospital provides the same care that private patients get.

Snugglemonkey · 06/12/2023 19:58

I have been fortunate and had private rooms. A ward is my idea if hell. You can pay fir a private room where I am from and I was horrified that I cannot here.

bettynutkins · 06/12/2023 20:05

I would definitely have preferred a private room but the option wasn't there due to COVID.
It was absolutely awful on the ward. I had had no sleep at all for 4 days, a newborn, no partner with me as he was sent home and all I could hear were people screaming whilst giving birth next door and all the babies and women around me. So I had absolutely no sleep again that night.
I was due to go home before as no complications but there wasn't anyone to do the baby check, the midwives didn't check on us once!!

InTheRainOnATrain · 06/12/2023 20:08

I couldn’t share a bedroom let alone a bathroom with others. You get private maternity wings in NHS hospitals- best of both worlds IMO as you get to go fully private but still have the NHS back up emergency care like the NICU. DD1 I had a steady stream of visitors and it was great. DS2 was boring but that was because of covid so DH had to leave on day 2 to get DD1 and couldn’t come back until I was discharged on day 3 and no one else was in. I binged Grays Anatomy, kept buzzing for more coffee and biscuits plus had some nice HCA to chat to though!

Got2getout · 06/12/2023 20:09

Have you got a midwife unit nearby? I had both of my babies in midwife units and each time had a single room for labour, delivery and recovery until going home. Never went in any other room at all.

I’m not sure how common such units are but I had my babies in two different hospitals in two different areas of the UK, so hopefully there are plenty of these around.

I don’t think I would have liked a ward personally.

discopoodle · 06/12/2023 20:09

Private room wasn't an option with either of my births but I'd have snapped it up if it were. I was in overnight with both dc and didn't sleep either time it was so noisy, the woman beside me her baby cried all night long, the woman across from me was snoring her head off and I was right beside the nurses station so all I heard all night was everyone's buzzers going off. I was begging to go home.

SoSad44 · 06/12/2023 20:12

1000% private room. I hated beinf on a ward after my first. No privacy, constant visitors, women on facetime from 6am, loud talking and crying (from babies and mums) throughout the night.

i had no sleep and was exhausted. Second baby I had a private room and was so well rested. I loved it, I was so happy and calm with my beautiful baby. No brainer for me.

febbabies2023 · 06/12/2023 20:12

I had both my babies at the same hospital and both times I was in a private room - the hospital I birth at only has private rooms and no ward. Best thing ever.

No sharing bathrooms, no noise from anyone else, midwives etc really not that far away at all. Partner could stay too.

Naively I thought all postnatal was private rooms - I never understood why people said take flip flops for the showers when you have your own! Only after having my first was I told that most hospitals are warded

Ardith · 06/12/2023 20:13

Definitely get a private room if you can. Near me there’s a private hospital.

mynameiscalypso · 06/12/2023 20:14

I had a private room (on the NHS). It was requested by the perinatal psychiatrist and the hospital were extremely good at accommodating it. It made such a difference to me especially as it had a loo/sink too. I actually have really fond memories of it which I don't think is usually the case with postnatal experiences!

SoSad44 · 06/12/2023 20:15

@MoonstoneGoddess toilets were indeed disgusting on the ward, I hated changing my pads ther. I had a private room with bathroom and it was amazing.

AuntieStella · 06/12/2023 20:18

You cannot be sure of getting a private room on NHs, so if it's that important to you, you might want to start pricing up private options.

NHS tends to allocate them by medical need (eg infection control, or those with other co-morbidities), those whose DC were stillborn or died neonatally (as it would be just cruel to put bereaved parents on a ward surrounded by new babies), those whose babies are in ICU but whose mother is too unwell to join them, super multiples, twins, others.

Reugny · 06/12/2023 20:20

It took a woman who looked like she been through the wars to arrive before everyone behaved.

They had to keep their curtains open, were placed next to the bathroom and opposite the nurses station.

The main issue is that they had to be checked on every 2 to 3 hours by medical staff so everyone was woken at that time.

GreatGateauxsby · 06/12/2023 20:22

AngelAurora · 06/12/2023 19:50

We do not give side wards out to private patients, they are critically ill or dying patients, or those with an infectious disease.

I am curious why people assume they will get a private room just because you paid privately.

If you are using a private Labour/Post Natal ward then fair enough, but a NHS hospital provides the same care that private patients get.

Hmmm so this just isn’t true.
the NHS does give side wards to patients who pay.

You can pay for a private room in most mat wards.

guy’s actually offers “semi private” your birth is nhs and postnatal is privately paid for.

so the reason OP thinks she can get a private room if she pays for one is because she can and it’s an option offered by her nhs hospital

at our hospital private rooms are allocated to priority patients first BUT if empty you can pay for one.
It’s what I plan to do as last time the mixed ward was hell on earth.
And it was very much the women who were the problem not the men.

Rachaelrachael · 06/12/2023 20:23

I stayed on the ward with both babies and it was horrendous. 1st time after a really traumatic PPH and 3 day labour, had a group of around 12 women in the bay next to me chanting and singing in another language at gone 8pm actually pushing their chairs into my space. I had to complain to the midwife to get them removed. 2nd time, a new mum on her phone constantly arguing with her partner.
Definitely get the private room if you can!

Lizzieregina · 06/12/2023 20:23

My only experience is a private room, it’s normal where I gave birth.

The thought of being surrounded by other noisy people at such a private time is awful to me.

If there’s a way to have a private room, I’d be trying to find it!

GreyWednesday · 06/12/2023 20:25

AngelAurora · 06/12/2023 19:50

We do not give side wards out to private patients, they are critically ill or dying patients, or those with an infectious disease.

I am curious why people assume they will get a private room just because you paid privately.

If you are using a private Labour/Post Natal ward then fair enough, but a NHS hospital provides the same care that private patients get.

Both of my local hospitals have private rooms with the option of paying for them. Obviously priority goes to those who need them for medical or other genuine reasons, but if they are available you can request one. I had one for the last night I was in hospital after having DD.

If you can afford a private room OP then I wouldn’t definitely mention that you’d like to be put on ‘the list’. It is lovely having an en-suite, and you’re right that you won’t be kept awake by noises or be close to unknown men.

The only thing I would say though, is that when I had DD every single person in my bay kept their curtains drawn all the time. So nobody saw me talking about in my nightdress or trying to breastfeed, and I didn’t see anyone else either. That might not be the norm (maybe we were just a highly unsocial bunch!), but something to consider.

Thankyouthankyoujellybean · 06/12/2023 20:35

Private rooms are bliss. I've been on a ward that was ok, but stressful for me because I like privacy, and side bay with four beds which was absolutely awful. Because there were only four of us, everyone seemed to think they were in a private room and would talk on their phone/ watch tv/ yell at their wife who had just had an emergency csection/ whatever at all hours. Much more claustrophobic and intimidating than a ward.

Tracker1234 · 06/12/2023 20:37

1 million % private room. You only have to see people who have experienced wards and the selfish behaviour to make a run for it! PP is 100% wrong re private rooms in NHS hospital. I had NHS birth first time with a paid for private room. Next time fully private. The view that the NHS will be waiting outside your door ready to burst in should anything gone wrong is laughable

MegaMeg2710 · 06/12/2023 20:55

Get the room!!! I got one with my first as I had an unknown infection, I was on a ward with my second as the rooms were all full so I couldn’t just pay for one, and it was still a little bit covid times. People took the piss with the limited visiting times, were openly FaceTiming all hours of the night, getting told off for Co sleeping so many times all night, midwives constantly in and out doing their checks (which I get) and I did not recover as well that time around due to lack of rest.

Bumbers · 06/12/2023 21:02

If I had had the choice, I would definitely pick private. Sadly, never an option.

I would say though- the first time there were no men allowed due to covid. The second time partners etc were allowed to stay overnight, although my DH didn't as with DS1. Honestly, it was SO MUCH BETTER with the men there - they helped the mums and so it was so much better than when exhausted mums were alone, sobbing or on the phone a lot.

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