Help! Christmas Party Excuses

[Terry8er]

I'm sure there will be a few of these around! So my work Xmas party is this week and we JUST found out (like this morning). Cursing myself a bit that for some reason I decided to test today - my period isn't even due for 2 days 😂 But here we are.
So everyone at work are big drinkers (me included) and it there's not so many of us so just sneaking non alc drinks would be clocked quickly.
My top thought currently is that I have to drive in order to pick up our other DC from nursery. This would mean I still get to go but, I need a reason why my DH can't collect her - any ideas?
The only other option I can think just to not attend at all and say I'm ill. Though I've recently been off ill for two days genuinely so this could also arouse suspicion.
I feel like the old antibiotics line for not drinking just won't fly.
Any thoughts? TIA

Can you say your DH caught whatever bug you had and cant pick up your DC? Or maybe hes away with work?
Or maybe say you had a heavy night the night before and are hungover and not feeling well?
Also... what time is this christmas party that you will drive to pick up a child from nursery??

I do agree that antibiotics will not fly. Theres only a couple of types that you cant drink on, and if you were ill just now, that will sound really suspicious!

DH has to work? He has the bug you had a few days ago, maybe he’s out already? Could you drive to work and say you’re leaving your car there, but then find out that the person that was doing pickup now can’t / has car trouble etc so unfortunately you’re gonna have to stay sober now.
or you can try with non alcoholic drinks that look alcoholic (lime and soda for example?) and if someone offers to buy you a drink maybe take them up on it once. Just nurse the drink and take it the toilet or outside or something to pour away?
I would probably just say I/dh/dc was ill tbh and avoid the whole thing because I’d find the lie too stressful!

I have mine next week and I'm going to say I have to drive as my husband is on his own works do

I don't really understand these posts. Just say you don't fancy drinking as you're still recovering.

I don't really understand these posts. Just say you don't fancy drinking as you're still recovering.

thats fine in some friendship groups. In others you may as well wear a big flashing sign saying ‘I’m pregnant’

Thanks for the suggestions guys, some good ideas!

The DH being on his do would have worked but ours got changed especially for me as it originally was on the same date and everyone knew how much I wanted to come 🙈 as two years ago I was heavily pregnant on it and last year I was still just about on mat leave and had to leave early as my mum was looking after DC for just a few hours as it's all I felt comfortable with at the time.

Yes@Marshmallowtoastie exactly, this group would know what was up straight away! My boss said she knew almost instantly last time just because I'd turned down a few brews 😂 They're not daft.

Party starts midday so I can leave just before 5pm and get back to pick up my DC (which I might as well do for real rather than DH if that's what I'm going with!). So I'd still get a decent amount of time there which I would feel better about rather than not going at all seeing as the date was moved for me.

I think a crisis meeting with an agency in town late in the day for DH that he can't really get out of might be the best bet. I can also say I don't mind so much as have been ill at the weekend. Another thing that everyone at work knows about is that I've been diagnosed with anemia recently so being ill does tend to knock me for six at the moment.

The trouble is I'm very open with people so most of them at work pretty much know everything about me 😂 (e.g. Me and DH are I sured on each others' cars so if his had an issue, someone would say can't he borrow yours if you don't need it with coming to the party!)

Say you’re on dry December. Carry around a donations signup sheet for sponsorship. People will very quickly drop the subject because they don’t want to have to commit to sponsoring someone’s charity effort at a Christmas party 😂

obviously you don’t actually collect the sponsorship.

I just drank apple juice all night and people thought it was wine 😅 worked a treat!

If youre a big drinker, in a big drinker group, that just doesnt fly.
Excuses need to be credible and both far fetched enough and not too much!

@Terry8er yes, go with a work excuse for your DH. And that it was last minute-ish (early enough that you knew to bring your car and that youd have to pick up DC, but not early enough that you could arrange for alternative childcare!)
And maybe just nurse a wine/beer, in a "I can have 1 drink, but no more!!!" kinda vibe!

@ASGIRC yes deffo - it helps that my mum comes over Tuesdays for childcare while I wfh. It's well over an hour's drive and obviously a big help for us but everyone at work would understand her not wanting to come out again two days later just so I can get pissed at my party! So a good excuse I think.

Yeah definitely thinking I could nurse a beer too - people seeing me with one drink would dispel any pregnancy suspicions I think.

There are people at work I would trust to tell early on but not THIS early. Just annoying timing (that's Baileys and Stilton out for Christmas too 😂) but we're absolutely thrilled 😁

@Terry8er Or your mom already had other plans, and couldnt change them, due to the last minute-ness of it all!

Yes, and Id still have the odd drink if I was driving, just not my usual, so nursing one will be good! Just pretend to sip it and throw it away slowly!

You can eat stilton, it is perfectly safe, as long as it is pasteurised (which, if you buy it in a supermarket, it will be!)

I’d actually pretend you are drinking - get a tonic instead of gin & tonic, carry around half a glass of Prosecco, absolutely no one will question you. If anyone asks you if you want a drink, shake your glass and say you still have one then go to the loo.

People are so interested in themselves they won’t actually notice but you’ll draw more attention to it if you say you’re ill / don’t fancy it / are on pick up

I was in a similar situation a couple of years ago.
Our Christmas do was in a small private room where we had a dedicated server and an open tab. I discreetly pulled him to one side, explained I was pregnant but no one knew, and asked him to keep bring me tonics made to look like gin and tonic when we ordered a round of drinks.
I also went to the loo, tipped Prosecco out of my glass and filled it up with water a couple of times.
No one noticed.

I think picking your DC up and nursing one drink is your best bet OP.

I was worried about the same scenario but I'm a bit further on so I've told my 3 closest colleagues and my boss. If I'm sat with them and have a glass of wine in front of me there's a good chance nobody else will really notice. If those 3 didn't already know though there'd be NO CHANCE any kind of excuse or 'don't fancy drinking' would fly. Our venue is also within walking distance of our house, so needing to drive wouldn't cut it either

I agree just drink something that looks alcoholic, ask for a soft drink but for it to be served in a gin glass. That's what I do, people will just assume your drinking

I've been a big drinker, and I've also been a non-drinker in the same groups (because of pregnancy and for other reasons). Anyone who made a big issue out of it went down in my estimation and marked themselves out as someone to avoid.

I stopped thinking it was amusing to guess if someone was pregnant by my mid 20s.

I just said I was on a health kick - wanted to cut down on ‘unhealthy’ stuff like drinking, vaping and coffee (this is very unlike me lol so wouldn’t work on close friends but it’s ok for colleagues!)

I honestly don't think I'd get away with trying to pass off soft drinks as alcohol. The first bit is a sit down meal and we've prebooked wine, beer and cocktails for the table. I even helped pick what to have so hard to say I don't fancy any of those on the day. I do think people would suss as I'm known to like a beer and I think people would buy me them speculatively without even asking. A sudden health thing might have worked if I'd had longer to do the groundwork but my team have been rating mince pies for weeks and been hitting the communal chocolates hard 😂

Appreciate all the ideas, I think I'll literally just turn up and say I've had a nightmare and that I'm in my car due to the DH meeting crisis he can't get out of so I'm on nursery pickup. Let everyone be disappointed for me and then move on from it so people aren't eyeing me up all night wondering if really I'm fibbing about what I'm drinking.

I should say also, I'm the only one at work with a child and I think people are expecting me to be having another at some point... so anything suspicious is likely to be outed. Like I say, if I was a bit further along I would tell a select few but after an early loss in my first pregnancy, I want to be cautious.

This might work fine at a party or a bar where you're ordering your own, but it's harder at a sit down meal when the waiter is hovering over the table for your order, and in a situation where (as at our Christmas do) someone is elected to take drink orders from everyone on arrival.