3b tear and stool incontinence

[Mumofonexo]

Hi,
Im 3 months pp from a forceps delivery and a 3b tear. I haven’t had any incontinence issues until now that my period has started 😞

basically my stool is really loose and I couldn’t hold it in.

if that has happened to you please tell me it got better. I’m currently under pft.

So sorry this is happening to you. By pft I assume you mean Pelvic Floor Therapist (or similar)?

I had urinary incontinence following a forceps birth and physio basically sorted it out within months. Although I did go private (no idea what nhs provision is like).

@Hitmewithyourrhythmstick

Hi yes I’m under nhs physical therapy. I hadn’t had any problems until now that my periods started.

I hope this is something they can sort out x

Well I’d let the physio do their stuff - if after a few months it hasn’t improved, maybe see a private physio if you can afford it

I would expect symptoms to improve, not worsen, when period restarted so maybe asking them and understanding this would be useful?

I had similar issues after my wee ones assisted delivery- although it was not a one off.
I remember a consultant being very blasé and saying it would get better over course of 2 years. Tbh This did not fill me with hope, but honestly as time went on my symptoms gradually improved ( not always linear) and by 2 years I was a different woman
You will be ok - it’s early days - I know it’s scary

@Hitmewithyourrhythmstick
To be honest that sounds like a good idea, I will literally try anything at this point if it helps. I don’t know why my symptoms have suddenly gotten worse not better.

@Rabbitrescue
Did you find you had issues when you had your period also? Yes I’m extremely worried about it not getting better as I have to go back to work in a few months and obviously that’s going to be impossible if I’m still having problems 😞

I had physical issues from get go tbh
I didn’t get my period back for months and months ( combination of bf and losing lots of weight due to stress likely) but yes period cycles definitely affected it. Even as I was improving my cycle symptoms were quite severe ans I remember being so disheartened and upset
I can still feel more aching/ pressure and just not as much ‘waiting time for loo’ during parts of my cycle now- but it is not an issue- like doesn’t hold back life now.
I was very very stressed about prospect of going back to work. I went ‘on sick’ for few months and actually changed job to one I had Better toilet access. But honestly I think back to where my body was a year pp and can barely recognise myself
Taking those extra months off made a difference and tbh I could manage my old job ( with extremely limited toilet access) now. Appreciate you might not be able to postpone work- but have faith months will make a difference and physio can be helpful.
I did go to private women’s health physio and I found it really helpful
nhs physio in my experience was quite basic ie ‘do your kegals’ and no other advice- whereas private taught me general exercise to strengthen core and pelvis and also to relax muscles properly, helpful little techniques etc
appreciate it’s expensive especially on mat leave!

@Rabbitrescue
Im so sorry you went through such a tough time as well. I really wish this side of childbirth was spoken about.

Did you ever get a burning sensation down below too? I do and it comes and goes.

I have 8 months left before I have to go back to work and I’m really hoping things improve by then as it’s making me really anxious.

I’ve been looking into private physio too as I really want to get better. I honestly didn’t think nearly 4 months down the line I’d be suffering so much still 😞

Hi OP, I had a 3a tear so got NHS physio but I also paid for private physio as well, I saw it as an investment in myself and it definitely made me work harder on my.exercises each day between appointments, I had a "mummy MOT" style appointment and then about 6 appointments 3-4 weeks apart.
Was well worth the money, there are few things in life that will make you unhappy as quickly as incontinence, and it's super important to rehab your pelvic floor if you ever want to consider a second pregnancy.
I'd also ask your other half to chip in, it was after all a joint decision for you to proceed with a pregnancy so it shouldn't just be you paying the price of the repercussions.

@SouthwestSis
Did you have any problems when your period started?

Yes I’ve been looking into one of those mummy mot’s, I’ve also purchased a pelvic floor machine.

I’m very lucky my husband has been very supportive and would do anything to make sure I’m ok again. It’s been such an emotional time and really hard to deal with while trying to take care of a newborn.

Did you know about severe tears while pregnant? I feel like it got completely glossed over by any medical professional I spoke to.

It was mentioned in my antenatal class but they didn't go into any depth.
My case was a bit complicated, I had a small bit of retained placenta and had to go back in for surgery under general anaesthetic at 8 weeks after a big bleed so it was all a bit of a mess for several months afterwards tbh!

@Mumofonexo sone burning but more like awful aching. Standing at all just put too much pressure on the area.
Glad to hear you have 8 months of mat leave left- things will improve
Also agree risk of tears is glossed over - I get why people don’t want to highlight it to pregnant woman- but I wish it was something discussed/ recognised as part of life generally.
I remember a consultant suggesting ‘well you had a baby what did you expect’ - I replied ‘ I expected to cross my legs when I laughed or coughed, maybe avoid Trampolines- no one never mentions incontience, tears or prolapses!’
So the shock definitely added to my upset
Also after all my issues I learnt my mum had similar just never mentioned it.

@SouthwestSis
Im sorry to hear that 😞 I hope your ok now.

@Rabbitrescue
I know what you mean about the aching, some days I feel like I’ve been kicked underneath.
yes I’m very glad I took the year off! I was debating on taking less but I’m very pleased I took as much time as I was allowed now especially because of what’s happened.
What an ignorant consultant! Like you said you’d just expect the “normal” things to happen after having a baby. I just assumed the only thing that really happened was you got slightly bigger hips some stretch marks and pee a little if you laugh! I didn’t expect any bowel issues 😣 it should be highlighted not to scare pregnant people but to educate so you can make an informed choice! If I had of known about tears and what can go wrong I would have opted for a c section I never would have had a vaginal birth. I know c sections carry risks but at least I wouldn’t be incontinent.

I’m sorry both you and your mum went through it 😢 do you know what grade tear you ended up with?