BBC Bump S3 finale Birth Plan ignored

[Guineapigfosterer]

I have just finished Bump on BBC Iplayer and I was quite shocked at how Ariels birth plan was disregarded.

I know this show is fiction and set in Australia but I just wanted advice.

Im 29 weeks, had a reasonably uncomplicated pregnancy until 2 weeks ago when i got diagnosed with gestational diabetes, put on insulin, had a bleed, cramps, baby was found to be on the small side (3rd and 10th percentile) and have a liver condition.

So the current odds are if things dont improve ill be induced around 37 weeks but i was wanting quite a relaxed natural birth with very little intervention pain relief but i dont see this happening now.

Can anyone offer any advice?

Hi OP

I've not seen the show, but as someone whose entire birth plan simply didn’t work out, I’d urge you to try not to place too much importance on it. Think of it as a birth preferences guide and if some of it works out then that’s a bonus.

i struggled a lot with feeling out of control in my first labour because nothing on my birth plan ended up being an option for me, in hindsight I wish I’d not let myself spend so much thinking about it. My baby arrived safe and healthy (albeit pre-term) and the rest is just circumstance :)

In my experience, and although it's counterintuitive, once you're on a pathway to intervention, the most reliable way to have a relaxing birth is an elective c-section.

I have had spontaneous vaginal birth with ventouse and forceps, an induction (due to GD) that failed and resulted in a c-section, and a planned c-section and the latter was the calmest, quietest, best experience of the lot with quickest recovery.

Obviously there are no guarantees and you have to go with what feels right for you, but I just wanted to offer my views as I felt a lot like you and was surprised how much my perspective changed.

Thank you @DysmalRadius and @glasspaw. Great advice. Preferences seems like the way to go. Got another growth scan tomorrow and depending on how many interventions get suggested leading up to labour. I may just go for the elective so I can feel a bit more secure about how it will go.

I had a pregnancy with a lot going wrong so I avoided making any kind of birth plan and decided I would just follow medical advice at all times. I found that this was much less stressful than having a plan that probably wouldn't be able to be followed. I'm pregnant with my second and again have no plan whatsoever, I know it will be a c-section as no other option but I'm keeping my expectations low - as long as my baby and I survive, that's all I'm focussing on. I've barely heard of anyone who has had a plan that has come to pass, I'm not sure the focus from antenatal classes on birth plans is very helpful.

Thank you @GingerKombucha growth scan today wasnt good little one has gone down from between 3rd and 10th to 3rd percentile so i think i will be induced at 37 weeks if things dont improve so maybe a section is the way to go so little one is in the best place sooner

I never bothered with a birthplan.

The single most important thing that helped me feel in control was going to the NHS run pre-natal physio sessions which explained very clearly how your body attempts to expel the baby once you are in labour - it was the words of the dour physio extolling the benefits of gravity that I remembered most during labour, her words months later kept me upright and moving as far as I was able.

I think the idea that creating a birth plan somehow gives you some greater control over what happens needs to be completely knocked on the head as its setting women up to 'fail' even as their baby is being born.

Get the baby out, keep us both alive was my only plan.

@Iudncuewbccgrcb yeah i think i was a bit naive to think that my breathe the baby out birth plan would work. Thank you. My new plan is definitley keep us both safe and with baby being small and my placenta potentially not behaving it all thr more important.

I think the term ‘birth plan’ is misleading. No birth ever goes to plan. Sometimes interventions are needed, so the fact that you have ‘whale music and good vibes’ written on a piece of paper is irrelevant.

Instead, I’d think in advance about the choices you’d make in various scenarios, including the imperfect and scary ones.

The birth plan is a ‘would like’, not a ‘will happen’. Where we can we will take your birth plan into account, absolutely. However we will always prioritise the clinical picture, which in your case has elements of clinical risk.

You may well find an elective section is calmer than an induction, but you are also only 29 weeks so things may improve. Try not to worry about it now, and don’t make a cast iron birth plan. Come back to it again at 32 weeks-ish when you are a bit further along, and weigh up your options then.

I agree. You can't plan what will happen but you can plan some aspects of your response to various potential situations.

For example, I was induced with DD2 at 37 weeks due to PPROM. The only "plan" I had was that I would flatly refuse the drip unless I had already been given an epidural. Not promised one, not told to wait and see and one would be given if I needed it, but actually had one in. As it happened I didn't need the drip, and the internal gel was the only thing I had. I couldn't plan whether or not I'd need the drip, I could plan not to be left without an epidural while I had one.

Thank you @HiyaWatha , @PosyPrettyToes & @CrispsandCheeseSandwich. This information is really good and i wish more people spoke about the scarier/less nice bits so you dont go into it with a false sense of security.

Ive had people pull faces at the though of me gettinf a section or induction but i think its out of my hands and what ever is best for the baby is what i will do.

So like you ahve said wait another 2 weeks for my next growth scan and consultant and go from there then discuss the odptions available and make a preferences but ultimately i want the safest and least stressful for me and little one.

I think people get too fixated on birth plans and invariably when they don’t go to plan they get very upset about the birth. I was like this with my first birth. Second one I didn’t bother with a birth plan and as long as my baby came out healthy that’s all I cared about….made it all far much easier to accept

If it does end up that they are offering you an induction, ask them to assess your Bishop’s score. If it’s low, the induction probably won’t work and you will end up with complications, likely with an emergency C-section anyway. So I’d go straight to elective c-section if that was the case.

I was like you until 36 weeks when my usual ( all been run of the mill GD growth scans) showed reduced growth and a potential issue with baby’s bowels. That was a rather stressful week as my dad had been diagnosed with end stage bowel cancer the week before!

I too wanted a natural birth I really wanted a water birth…… I went in to get induced bang on 37 weeks (and it took 4 days) I had an absolutely lovely constant who saw me after the growth scan who said it was better to have baby out and here so we decided to go in!!

I resigned myself to making it the best experience I could have as it was my first- everything was different from what I wanted but from the beginning ended up with an epidural after not really given it much thought but used all my hypno birthing techniques!

And baby arrived really quickly once they finally broke my waters and evened happy and healthy which ultimately was what we were aiming for!!

Good luck for whatever the next few weeks hold for you….

but i was wanting quite a relaxed natural birth with very little intervention pain relief but i dont see this happening now.

Without being patronising this is such a FTM comment. As though most women don't generally hope for a relaxed birth with little intervention. No one goes in hoping they need a long induction, or forceps or an episiotomy, EMCS etc.
You need to be realistic. Intervention is not a dirty word, they are methods that exist to birth your baby in the safest way possible based on the scenario you are in.
Maybe you will need some, maybe you won't.

The easiest way to have a relaxed birth is to stop over planning and accept that you can't control every possible outcome.