I'm pregnant with number 3 and I feel so flat - help me find the joy please...

[bigmouthstrikesagain]

This is an unexpected pg but we have a big enough house, are ok financially etc. so I should just be happy.

It does not help that since finding out, my Mum has moved hundreds of miles away, we have been on the worst holiday ever (the dc's and dh and i were ill), We all have some kind of vomiting bug this weekend, I feel tired and awful most of the time. No energy to play with the kids or cook. My son is starting school this sept (I am due in Oct), I was looking forward to helping him settle and spending some time with dd who will be 2.5 when new baby is due.

I know I should be happy and look forward but all I can see is the hard work etc. It will get better won't it????

Oh yes, it will get better. You feel like shit partly because you have been throwing your ring up, partly because of the general tiredness and crappiness of early pregnancy. There will be moments of unexpected joy in the whole thing, but there will equally be moments of misery and crap, because that';s life in general. Congratulations on your PG, and hope for the lovely thrilling 2nd trimester stage when you're all blooming and fecund and glossy and randy (worked for me...)

Thank you Madamez I really do hope I will start blooming soon - it is true that is difficult to stay positive while trying to hold ones dinner down and splashing the dettol round and picking bits of sick out of the washing Thank god the kids are better and sleeping tonight - but poor dh is downstairs chucking his guts up and I can't help him as I will just join in - bleurghhhhh

I felt like that with this baby (number 2) and it wasn't till a few weeks ago that I started getting enthused about the idea. I was just too sodding busy to think about it.

I think with first pregnancies you have enough time to focus on the baby and a romance of sorts develops between the two of you - all those dreams.

With later pregnancies - well who has the time? I have a screamy toddler who is still breastfeeding and am still trying to get used to all the weird parts of parenthood that no-one warns you about. Ce la vie.

It will get better. I only really fell in love with this baby after we had an amnio because I had a bad triple test result (he's fine). I guess I was holding back from getting attached till I knew everything was well because I have one DD but have lost two pregnancies. But as I say, it does work out over time.

I had ds2 in august (4 days before dd started school), ds1 was 2.4. Has been completely fantastic and would love to have the last 6 months all over again. Yes there are parts that are really hard work but having had 2 babies already I know that these pass really quickly so have tried to hold onto every second while it lasts. Even the waking in the night as it's a chance to spend time with ds2 on his own!

It has been great being on mat leave for 1st year dd is at school - have been able pick up and drop off every day (won't be able to when back at work), the baby slept loads to begin with so had plenty of time with ds1.

The stage we're at now is fantatic too - loads of laughter and mess!

You will be feeling really tired and hormonal - don't worry it will get better - good luck!

Oh poor you! I'm sure if your DH wasn't ill you would be able to leave more to him right now, which in turn would leave you more rested As madamez says, just wait for the bloom to kick in

And re you DS starting school etc, remember that although small babies take lots of time & energy, compared to toddlers and bigger ones, small babies really are EASY... they stay where you put them, and they sleep an awful lot!! And they cry like mewing kittens I'm sure no 3 will fit right in, as he/she will have constant cabaret from day 1.

Sending healthy vibes your way!

Thank you for your kind messages - unfortaely I am feeling really rough so am going to throw up again soon so ober and out for now

hope you're all feeling better today bigmouth

Thank you for your kind responses tthey have helped

I was throwing up for 12 hours from 2am yesterday, so couldn't mnet till now. Have finally been able to eat this evening. This is a horrible bug and I really hope the baby is ok. Have a midwife appt tomorrow so will see what she says.

Anyway thanks again for the positive vibes.

Glad you're feeling better - babies are tough I'm sure everything will be fine - has it helped to make you realise how much you really do want the baby? It took a little bleed at 9 weeks to make me know!

Hi
, this is my third pregnancy, i am 36 with a seventeen yr old and a 15 yr old, both typically stroppy teenage girls, i never expected that i would have anymore, i often thought about it and always got broody when babysitting for friends babies,i try so hard to feel happy and excited, it lasts for about 5 mins then all the fears kick in again, my partner and my girls are all happy and looking forward to it, but i am not, and i can't explain why it sounds silly but i worry that i will end up on my own again with a baby, i think my moodiness isn't helping but at the moment everything no matter how silly irritates me, i'm tired, achy and down all the time, i know i should be so happy , am i just selfish probably ! lol

many people don't start to bond with their baby until they've actually had it. once it's here you'll be so loved up you'll look back at this thread and laugh!