2 child and pregnant with 3rd

[e11z20]

Really anxious about writing this but don't know what else to do.
I'm a single parent of 2 boys (11 & 3). My youngest has been diagnosed with GDD and waiting for ASD assessment. Both my boys are truly amazing and I love them with every fibre. But they can be demanding.

Today I found out I'm pregnant, already had a feeling but the test confirmed it to be true so this would be number 3.

I am so so so torn what to do. Never thought I'd be in this position of having to be at home full time with my youngest while we wait for further investigations and diagnoses. He does attend a SEN nursery twice a week but hasn't done a full day yet as he hasn't properly settled in.

Being single, currently unemployed until i dont know when, with 2 boys already, my immediate thought was to end the pregnancy but I've always said regardless I would never do that. Just this is not how I expected life to be and i am torn between head, heart and reality

What a stressful situation.

What does the father think? Would you get any support from him? Do you want a continuing parenting relationship with him?

Unless he can offer a huge amount of support then I think you need to terminate the pregnancy. It is likely to be in the best interests of your existing children.

He’s not the most supportive. He doesn’t willingly support, everything has to be asked for which most of the time I don’t bother, I just do what I have to do.

Deep down I know what the right decision is but it doesn’t make it any less hurtful and confusing. Had a constant battle in my head all day as I have always said if it happens then you see it through and deal with it.

thank you for your reply @helpmum2003 x

Don't beat urself up about it. In your shoes I wouldn't continue with the pregnancy. I never used to agree with abortion and thought similarly to yourself. However since becoming a mum I now know how hard it is to be a parent. You're doing an amazing job for ur 2 boys.

@gerteddy thank you. Just such an awful decision as I was told after my 2nd was born after complications and due to medical reasons i may not have anymore children so when I found this out after not having any pregnancies since it was a real shock.
Really feel heartbroken but have to make the best decision. I'm trying to get it done quickly as I'm only very early (4weeks) and I know if they scan and there's a visible heartbeat etc my mind will fall apart. Wish there was a magic spell to make this go away and have no memory of it 🥺. Hope you and the family are well x