NCT course- social aspects

[Gardenlady543]

I am booked onto a NCT course, because of my history I'm not able to have a vaginal birth, the tutor called me and advised that we should come 1.5 hours after the start to miss that part of the course. From what I can see most people say the main benefit of attending the course is for the social aspects, so I asked if the tutor could do the introduction part when we get there, but she said no.

I feel like arriving late will mean everyone has already started talking and mixing. What do those that have done the course think? Do I sit through 1.5 hours of content even though it's likely to be upsetting for the social aspects or should we arrive late?

I can assure you this is not what they should be saying - you have paid for the whole course and should go when you want at the start, as there may be some things that may be useful to you. Email the booking support team to log it.

Thanks everyone, I think the tutor is trying to save me sitting through potentially triggering content because it's a difficult history that means I'm not able to have a vaginal birth. It sounds like whether the group gels is hit or miss but that if it does, I feel me coming in late could mean I'm left out. I'm not sure what to do as there isn't any flexibility in the schedule, it will be introductions then this content, so I either come late or sit through it, still not sure what to do.

As I said above, I attended an NCT course on the urging of my midwife for precisely those reasons. Yet my group didn’t gel at all, despite having our lives turned upside down at the same time and in the same way. Having babies at the same time didn’t overcome the fact that, unsurprisingly for eight couples thrown together by circumstances, we were just very different people. Others on the thread had similar experiences. My baby was born in April, the second last of the cohort — we’d all stopped meeting or contacting one another by midsummer. It is luck whether the experience of having babies together is enough to bond you!

I know part of this is just hearsay/second hand info but I joined Bump and Baby instead of NCT as I was told by a few friends that it is more giving of advice on c sections and a bit more modern/flexible.

I think it all comes down to instructor on the day and the group of people you get, but may be worth looking if it would suit you more.

I loved NCT for the social aspects! Four months postpartum and we see each other most weeks, but it was a small group of 5 couples so it's a bit easier to arrange things. The format of courses can be different, but we did introductions at the beginning of every session (we had 5) - you're never going to remember everything from the first session, so it helped with learning names etc! You could ask your teacher to do that. Alternatively, you could go for the introductions at the beginning and then go for a long walk, trip to a coffee drive through, for 90 mins while they cover vaginal delivery.

Hi everyone, thanks for all the advice :) just to update... The day before the course I messaged the tutor and said I wanted to arrive from the start to not miss out on the introductions etc and how other NCT groups had been given c section activities while vaginal births were being covered.

The tutor called me and said she only had one c section activity but reached out to other NCT tutors for ideas. She ended up finding loads and 3 of the 8 couples were having planned c sections, so it ended up being really good and very focused on c sections for the group I was in. The tutor also said it had helped her as a tutor. So it all worked out well in the end.