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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Morning after pill failed

22 replies

Sweetielsg · 19/10/2023 13:13

Had a positive pregnancy test today, cannot believe it. Already have two children, has this happened to anyone else? Make me feel better, someone, anyone!

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Herecomesdehotstepper · 19/10/2023 13:24

Happened to my friend. ONS, condom failed, MAP failed, DC now at school.

LizzeyBenett · 19/10/2023 13:32

Morning after pill delays ovulation but if you are ovulating or after ovulating already and then taken the morning after pill it can't work . Happens more than you would think

Fridaysgirl17 · 19/10/2023 13:33

Happened to me, condom failure, took the MAP & that didn't work either, he's now 3 sitting beside me.

Sweetielsg · 19/10/2023 13:38

The father is not going to pleased :(

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androidnotapple · 19/10/2023 13:39

You have options. You don't have to have this baby and you don't have to justify your choice to anyone.

Dodie66 · 19/10/2023 13:39

How do you feel about it? You said the father one be pleased

Sweetielsg · 19/10/2023 13:43

I know, I had an abortion in my late teens, it was awful at the time. 39 now and not keen on doing it again but also work full time and have two children so not sure how I would manage a teenager, a 9yr old and a baby :( also the father is going to say he wants me to end the pregnancy. I know this before I've told him. I'm having a really rubbish day! Sorry, I know none of you can do anything about this. Just getting thoughts out via mumsnet!

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Dodie66 · 19/10/2023 13:50

Don’t be pressured into doing anything you don’t want to do. How many weeks are you? Do you have time to think more about it?

Sweetielsg · 19/10/2023 13:58

I don't know, I've booked in tonight to have a private scan at 7.45pm to find out. It must be pretty early but the line was very strong on the test and on the last two the lines was quite faint at an early stage. Honestly I feel sick at the thought of telling him. We don't live together, my kids aren't his and he has 3 with ex partner. He's been very clear he doesn't want more children.

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Sa11yCinnamon · 19/10/2023 13:58

No advice, just sending you a massive hug xx

Sweetielsg · 19/10/2023 14:00

So lovely, thank you 😪

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Terrifyingface · 19/10/2023 14:01

I'm not going to tell you what to do but sending hugs. Personally, for me, if I was sure enough I didn't want a baby that I'd taken the MAP, I wouldn't continue the pregnancy. An early termination in many ways isn't that different to taking the MAP in the mechanics of it, to my mind it would just be completing the process that you'd already started in ending any potential pregnancy.

androidnotapple · 19/10/2023 14:07

Sweetielsg · 19/10/2023 13:43

I know, I had an abortion in my late teens, it was awful at the time. 39 now and not keen on doing it again but also work full time and have two children so not sure how I would manage a teenager, a 9yr old and a baby :( also the father is going to say he wants me to end the pregnancy. I know this before I've told him. I'm having a really rubbish day! Sorry, I know none of you can do anything about this. Just getting thoughts out via mumsnet!

Don't tell him for now until you've made your mind up, Don't tell him at all if you have a TOP

RandomMess · 19/10/2023 14:10
Flowers

Happened to me, she's an adult now, same with my friend a week later. Bloody condoms!!

MrsTerryPratchett · 19/10/2023 14:12

Sweetielsg · 19/10/2023 13:58

I don't know, I've booked in tonight to have a private scan at 7.45pm to find out. It must be pretty early but the line was very strong on the test and on the last two the lines was quite faint at an early stage. Honestly I feel sick at the thought of telling him. We don't live together, my kids aren't his and he has 3 with ex partner. He's been very clear he doesn't want more children.

He might have been very clear but he didn't have a vasectomy, which would have almost guaranteed it. You tried to prevent pregnancy and it didn't work. Not your fault and you shouldn't be worrying about his feelings right now. JUST your own.

Breathe, and really consider what you want. There is no wrong decision, just two hard options.

Tellmemore16 · 19/10/2023 14:13

Yeah happened to me, I have sex 1 time in a year, took the morning after pill and low behold I was pregnant!

Sweetielsg · 19/10/2023 14:13

I need the weekend to think about it. He's just going about his day not having to deal with any of this!

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Sweetielsg · 19/10/2023 14:13

Do you mind me asking what you did?

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Tellmemore16 · 19/10/2023 14:17

I will be really honest and say I terminated, my partner was going through a nervous breakdown and had attempted suicide which is why we hadn’t had sex in so long, I had a 3 year old and worked full time, trying to manage my partners mental health, my own life and then a new born would have more than likely tipped me over the edge. You have to do what’s right for you lovely, don’t feel pressured into any sort of decision, take time to think it all over and if you need a good cry do that too! Sending you lots of love ❤️

MadeForThis · 19/10/2023 14:32

I wouldn't tell him until you have had the time to decide what you want to do.

scaredorganicyoghurt · 19/10/2023 14:45

It happened to me, took the MAP, still got pregnant, never had been pregnant before. BF was fairly new and really didn't want it, made hints about the state of his mental health, so I had a termination. To be honest it absolutely wrecked me, I'm not who I was before it. Whatever you do, don't make your decision based off his reaction, it has to be entirely your decision, because if you regret it it could destroy you. I'm so sorry, it's such a shit position to be in xxx

Throwaway0912 · 19/10/2023 15:26

You could have been me a few weeks ago. Already have DC plus stepDC, and we've known we've been done having any more children for a while, DH waiting on vasectomy appointment.

Condom failure, took MAP, but still pregnant, I'd never really looked into the MAP but I didn't realise it wasn't effective once you've ovulated. Seems a bit of a design flaw, but I digress.

I already knew deep down I'd terminate and when I told DH his thinking was the same. However, I was settled in my mind what my choice would be before I told him, and I think you need to take the time to decide too before any other influences have their say.

I got pills by post, I was around 7 weeks when I eventually got them delivered. Took the first pill at home on a Thursday, second lot on the Friday afternoon, things hit a peak on the Friday night and by Saturday evening I felt pretty much back to normal. It was definitely easier doing it at home (I had a medical termination in my late teens which had to be done in hospital and felt much more traumatic, I always swore I'd never have another one) and I managed with standard pain relief.

Only you can make the decision and it's not easy, both choices have their own issues to contend with. Even though I was certain I didn't want another baby, I felt very mixed emotions and still do. Seeing the pregnancy test go back negative was sad, reflecting on the joy previous positive tests had brought. If you don't continue, please allow yourself to grieve if you need to, just because you've chosen not to continue with an unplanned pregnancy doesn't mean you can't be kind to yourself. It's complicated whichever road you go down, I wish you the best.

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