OH and I have been together about a year and a half - both wanted a family, so I've been off contraception for best part of a year now. I'm 39 and he 44, so we figured we didn't have time to waste!
Tbh, I'd kind of assumed it wouldn't actually happen - I'm old, unfit, smoker, never been pregnant before, etc... So when my period was late, I put it down to recent covid... But now it's over a week late & my boobs are super tender, so.... This morning I got 2 BFPs!! Super excited, but also super terrified, and trying not to get my hopes up too much, as I know how common miscarriage is at this age. OH's working away till tomorrow, and I have no family, so dealing with it on my own so far.
Trouble is, just a few days ago, OH admitted he's been having suicidal thoughts recently due to stress over work and finances. I'm SO scared that telling him's going to make it worse. Wish I could wait a bit and make sure it's a sticky bean before letting him know, but obviously I can't smoke now, so he's gonna know what's happening once he gets back tomorrow night.
I feel like he'll put a brave face on for me, but scared of what he'll really think (and also a bit scared myself about how we'll cope financially when his business isn't doing well at all).
Anyone got any advice or positive stories to help me feel braver?
(Also: I've never wanted a cigarette so badly! Must admit I've had a few puffs on an old vape, but I'm trying my hardest!)