Feeling so lonely during pregnancy

[vanillaperfume]

I don't know if being pregnant is just heightening my sensitivity and emotions but blimey everything seems to be getting on top of me. DP is hot and cold constantly to the point I wonder if he even wants to be with me, we're staying with friends (who are great, plenty of space etc) currently as the sale fell through but I'm so desperate to have something concrete sorted before Xmas as I'm due early January, although DP doesn't seem to share my urgency. Money is tight, same as everyone and I'll qualify for mat allowance as not long started at my new job which I haven't really looked into yet.
I feel like there is no real reason to me moaning. But I don't seem to have anyone to talk to so thought maybe I could rant here. I don't know if my MH is being affected but I definitely feel lonely and isolated and feel sorry for bringing a baby into a not so perfect situation.

You are dealing with a lot! It's OK to acknowledge that. Not having stable housing with a baby on the way and a partner who seems checked-out is a lot.

The thing about babies is that they have no idea what's going on. So this is actually a great time to have a baby! The baby is not going to care if you can't get your own housing or if your partner is behaving strangely.

Honestly, don't think you're doing the wrong thing. It's the younger portion of the population that generally has babies, so it's completely normal for babies to be born into less-than-palatial surroundings. Even Kate Middleton was, apparently. Looking after a baby and recovering from childbirth is insanely busy anyway, so why not pack some more problems in there as well and get them out of the way when you're so busy and tired that you'll hardly notice!

It sounds like you need to have some fun and distraction. And a serious conversation with your partner about how you're feeling if you haven't done so already. Are there any friends you can invite out for a (free) walk at the park or a (cheap) coffee? Could you get on Meetup.com and find out if there are any social groups in your area that might suit you? Don't be picky. Take any opportunity you can to do something a bit different from your usual activities. Doing something new might help break those thought patterns that are worrying you.

Good luck.

Hi @vanillaperfume
I totally know that lonley feeling when pregnant. I'm pregnant with second baby and still living with parents. Our financial situation isn't great and we couldn't keep waiting to have the second baby, i'm in my 40's. Stay strong hun, this time will pass xx

Thanks both for your reassurance. I feel like things needs to be in place before the baby arrives but I know we'd get by somehow.

Sending solidarity, I completely get this (for very different reasons).

I'm due next week and my mum is terminally ill and I'm caring for her, and I'm shit scared about what will happen when my baby comes and I can no longer do what I've been doing. I think friends get really awkward asking about how things are, so aside from my (admittedly wonderful) husband, I feel really isolated. I feel so sorry that my much wanted baby isn't coming into the world to meet a really happy mum. I took some time off before maternity leave to relax and its been completely filled with care duties.

There's no right way to do this - as PP have said, it's a difficult and stressful time no matter what, and though external factors can 1000% make things feel worse, focusing on your baby might help you navigate these situations a little better by putting everything else into perspective. Your partner not being supportive is awful though as I agree, that can be a saving grace during times of upheaval and insecurity.

I'm so sorry to hear of your situation. There are no words to make it any better but you are in my thoughts. At least it's nice to know it's not an alien feeling, whatever the situation