Just found out I am pregnant at 42

[Timeforchange12]

Hello all, as the subject suggests, I've just discovered I'm pregnant.

Over the past 2 years I have had 2 chemical pregnancies, 2 miscarriages at approx 8 weeks and 1 late miscarriage. As you can imagine, this has taken its toll on both my partner and I and as of August 2022 we decided to stop trying, we sold of our baby things (we have a 3 year old) and moved into a 3 bed property (we have 2 dc's full time living with us and 1 who comes eow).

I told my partner last night and he just looked so scared, his main concern is that this will end in miscarriage and its difficult to imagine it any other way because of whats happened previously. He doesn't want to see me in pain, and we even talked about abortion because of the inevitiblity of the pregnancy ending at some point anyway and he thinks it will be a less painful option.

We should be excited but all we feel is terrified.

I haven't been where you are OP but one thing that jumps out to me is I really don't think an abortion is likely to help matters, as that will come with its own set of emotional ramifications, it's not an easy way out for someone in your position.

Yes I think you are right. I think the idea is that we would have control over timings and wouldn't be waiting for it to happen naturally.

Hi Lovely, (BIG Hugs to you both!)

I found out August last year, that I was pregnant and 2 days later, I ended up at urgent care in agony. A DR felt my stomach , took bloods and sent me home saying I was likely having a miscarriage as had started bleeding. When I say agony, I couldn't walk and my partner and a woman who had been bit by a horse picked me up in the car park to help me into the car.

My partner drove me to my nearest hospital and an hour later whilst in a toilet my waters broke. I'll leave out the details but 2 hours later, I gave birth to our gorgeous 20 week old son, it was my partners first child and it was very traumatic. I was in and out of consciousness and the next day I had surgery to have the placenta removed. Then the following month, we had the babies funeral. So all just a huge shock.

I'm 41, he is 46 (and we have my 2 children aged 14 and 19, their father had his parental rights removed and died 10 years ago, so for the last 8 my partner has been their Dad)

I found out again I was pregnant on the 29th August this year. Out of the blue!

I had a booking in appointment with a Midwife and due to my age and last Augusts experience, a consultant referred me for an early scan at EPU last Weds. Going by my dates, I thought I would be around 7 weeks, but I measured just over 5 or 5 and a half. Yolk sac but no heartbeat, so I am rebooked for 4th October to check on progress as EPU expect my dates might be out as I don't track ovulation.

I have also had miscarriages in the past.

We are extremely anxious and worried and my partner has been the same, he never wants to hear me from a corridor or see me suffer like that again!

It's a terribly frightening (and somedays exciting) time - you don't know how to think or feel a lot of the time!

I cannot offer any reassurance, but I'm in a very similar boat and would be happy to chat!

I hope you are as well as you can be. Sending positivity and love your way! xx
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Thank you so much for your lovely message.

I'm so sorry for the loss of your baby boy.

Congratulations on your pregnancy, I know the waiting between early scans can be so terrifying, this time next week hopefully your mind will be put at rest. I know with my 3 year old I was measuring about a week behind, probably due to late ovulation so I think it happens a lot.

It is so true that you don't know at all what to think, or what to feel. I would say dazed is appropriate!

I decided to keep busy today to try and clear my mind, but no, I've just been googling and scaring myself further.

It would be amazing to chat with someone in the same boat xxx

Thank you! Dazed is absolutely the right word!

Please feel free to send me a message xx