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Original poster

Life after a 3rd degree tear

27 replies

Mumofonexo · 22/09/2023 16:35

I recently gave birth to my little one but unfortunately it resulted in a forceps delivery and a 3rd degree tear. Tmi but I seem to have complete control over my bladder but when I need to poop i need to go urgently. Just wondering if anyone else had the same issue and did it resolve itself? Also what are the chances of making a full recovery or will I always have some sort of issue now because of the tear 🙃

OP posts:
SuperNoodleDoodle · 22/09/2023 16:40

How recently is recent?

It took me quite a few months (and lots of pelvic floor exercises) to recover from my third degree tear. But I did fully recoverSmile

itsallnewnow · 22/09/2023 16:42

I had a really bad tear and unusual because it was high up inside rather than visible in the ‘Normal’ spot. Everything down there was awful for a while, pooing in particular although I had a different variation. I had no sensation of needing to go so would leave myself constipated. Sex was really impossible for about 8 months. By 12 months it was minimally annoying and now at 2 and a bit years later I honestly feel like it never happened. So sorry you’re going through though it’s rough in the early months

Original poster
Mumofonexo · 22/09/2023 16:50

6 weeks ago ☹️ Did you have problems controlling your poop (sorry I don’t know how else to put it) I haven’t messed myself but I have to get the toilet quickly out of fear of doing so. Will pelvic floor exercises help with this?

OP posts:
Original poster
Mumofonexo · 22/09/2023 16:52

@SuperNoodleDoodle
6 weeks ago ☹️ Did you have problems controlling your poop (sorry I don’t know how else to put it) I haven’t messed myself but I have to get the toilet quickly out of fear of doing so. Will pelvic floor exercises help with this?

OP posts:
Koalaslippers · 22/09/2023 16:55

I found the same as you after my 3rd degree tear. I can't remember exactly when it got better but I definitely fine by 4 months.

BillStickersIsInnocent · 22/09/2023 16:56

Yes I had problems with loss of sensation and sphincter damage - not fully emptying my bowels and not registering if poo was still there ready to come out, not knowing if it was a poo or a fart, that sort of thing. I saw a surgeon 2 years post partum who said he could repair it but a good possibility it could make it worse so we decided not to do that.

10 years on and it is 99% better.

I really feel for you and hopefully you can get some help via your GP if it continues.

Original poster
Mumofonexo · 22/09/2023 16:58

@itsallnewnow

Ouch 😣 I had a few internal stitches so I can’t imagine how sore that must of been for you.

I think sex will be a no go for months to be honest. I just want to heal and ngl I’m petrified of how much it will hurt.

Did you find anything helped with your recovery?

Thank you 💗 sadly no one talks about this side of having a baby.

OP posts:
Aparecium · 22/09/2023 17:01

Your pelvic nerves have been stretched to there and back, plus the tear will have affected them. I had similar problems. Pelvic floor exercises are key to regaining sensation.

Go to the loo regularly, especially after meals, and just sit and relax. Your body knows what to do, even if the connection with your brain isn't quite there at the moment. Drink plenty of water and lots of veg, oats and milled seeds to keep both systems working regularly.

IME bladder sensation came back faster than bowel. At 6w PP I still didn't know that I needed to poo until the last minute.

amispeakingintongues · 22/09/2023 17:03

OP please consult a pelvic floor therapist asap. GP might be able to refer you Flowers

Original poster
Mumofonexo · 22/09/2023 17:07

@BillStickersIsInnocent

Yes I’ve experienced that too! Sometimes thinking I need the loo but it was a fart only because I felt pressure down there.

Wow no I wouldn’t want surgery if it could make things worse but it sounds like you did the right thing.

Thank you, I just want to enjoy my LO but it’s so hard when your constantly worried about what the future holds for you health wise. That might sound dramatic but I don’t want to be pooping myself if I can’t get to a bathroom ☹️

OP posts:
Original poster
Mumofonexo · 22/09/2023 17:13

@Aparecium

Thats reassuring you felt the same way. Do you remember roughly when it got better for you?

Ive been referred to physiotherapy so hopefully that will help things improve.

OP posts:
BillStickersIsInnocent · 22/09/2023 17:15

Yes it made me very paranoid and I was hyper focused on sensations down there which I think fuelled my anxiety about it.

It’s still early days with you - have you had a check up with the GP yet? Is it still at 6 weeks I can’t remember! Mention it to them and they can help. I saw a specialist nurse first who gave me lots of diet and positioning on the toilet advice, building a poo routine etc then a dietician to help keep everything healthy. Then eventually a surgeon who was lovely and helpful.

itsallnewnow · 22/09/2023 17:39

I saw a specialist
Women's health physio, had to go private but was £55 which I thought was v reasonable and I did the exercise religiously. Also took lots of warm baths with no bubble bath to make sure no infections.

Also took it really slow with any kind of activity beyond walking and treated it as a long recovery period rather than pushing myself to do more.

jadey1991 · 22/09/2023 17:47

I had a 3rd degree tear with my 3rd child and shoulder dystopia. I had problems with urgently needing to wee and poo too. To be fair with peeing there was times I peed myself as I was slightly incontinent.

It took me a few months and physio before things started to get better.

Cupofteaandcrackers · 22/09/2023 17:48

19 years later I still have light incontinence and urgency when I need to open my bowels occasionally. It's is no where near as bad as it was in the first year. I did have some physio from the incontinence service and some scans under uro/gynacology which helped a little and well worth it however I had to wait quite a while before I was referred to see if it would correct itself. Definitely something that's not talked about much unfortunately (although I think it has improved since I had my first). Having had a traumatic birth I was never asked if my bladder or bowels were OK (except 4 hours after catheter removal). Might be worth mentioning when you have your checkup next so that it's logged and you can ask when you'd be eligible for referral.

Original poster
Mumofonexo · 22/09/2023 17:49

@BillStickersIsInnocent

I feel the same at the moment, just constantly worried about how everything will be in the long run.

I have my check up next week and will definitely be mentioning it. That’s good that you got lots of advice on things to help! I hope I can be offered some advice on ways to help.

OP posts:
MariaVT65 · 22/09/2023 17:52

I actually had the same thing after my emergency c section. It did eventually get better so I’m hoping you’ll feel better as well, especially with the physio :) It’s really shocking just how much little info and help we get with recovery.

Original poster
Mumofonexo · 22/09/2023 17:55

Thank you all for your advice. I will be talking to my gp about the urgency issues and if anything can be done to help.

I will be taking it super easy to give myself to best possible change at recovery.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mumofonexo · 22/09/2023 18:00

@MariaVT65

Totally agree with you there isn’t enough inform/help out there with recovery. Plus no one seems to talk about the postpartum problems openly😣

OP posts:
Mummyme87 · 22/09/2023 18:10

I had a 3B 5.5yrs ago. My pelvic floor isn’t amazing, I do have some stress incontinence but much improved and bowels feel fine. Just had my endoanal scan actually and all perfect, bar could improve pelvic floor.
lots of pelvic floor, and if not improving I would say by 4-6months, ask GP for physio referral.

im currently pregnant again, hoping for a smaller tear this time!!

Original poster
Mumofonexo · 22/09/2023 18:58

@Mummyme87

wow that’s amazing news that you’ve healed so well 😊 and congratulations on the pregnancy I hope you have a smooth delivery 🤞

OP posts:
BeKind88 · 12/01/2024 06:23

@Mumofonexo

how are you now? I am 6 weeks pp with 3rd degree tear and forceps and am feeling the same way you did

wasanneofcleves · 12/01/2024 07:57

Pelvic floor exercises are absolutely fundamental to recovery. If you're not sure how to do them have a look online. I'm sure there are apps etc to help you remember to do them. Equally, easing yourself into exercise like Pilates where you are engaging your tummy and pelvic floor will really help.

Oblomov23 · 12/01/2024 20:35

My friend has a third degree tear. Hoping she recovers soon.

AnonymousXXIX · 13/01/2024 15:01

I can see this is a somewhat older thread, but maybe this is helpful: I had no bladder control for 1 week after forceps delivery (no 3rd degree tear though). And I do mean zero control. Was completely taken by surprise because I had NEVER heard of this before and didn't have a clue wtf was happening. But it gradually resolved itself, and after about 2 weeks it was okay!

I got an NHS referral for a specialist physio... who contacted me 10 months after I had given birth 😂At that stage all was completely fine and I told them to please urgently see other people who need help...