Struggling to conceive third child

[Toomanychoices123]

I am 37, I have 2 daughters aged 2.5 and 5.5 and we have been TTC our third child for a year now. I fell pregnant in the first couple of months with both girls. I had gestational diabetes with my second. I have had c sections with both children. I guess I just wanted to ask if anyone else has been in a similar situation where they struggled to conceive again a third time? I understand that I’m older now so my fertility Isn’t what it used to be but I’m feeling like it might not happen. Just looking for some positive stories or reassurance I guess.

Similar story for us trying to have number two at 36- first one three years earlier came on the first month of trying, baby two took after 15 months.

We were just starting fertility tests thinking something must be wrong.

For me I was really stressed and tired at the time and I think that was delaying things- do you think the day to day grind might be doing similar for you? I conceived no 1 whilst on holiday and I do still think that may have made things more likely.

Thanks for your reply @Barleysugar86 I do think that the daily grind is probably not helping, I don’t feel particularly tired or stressed but I guess you never know. I just don’t know if it will ever happen. My sister is also struggling to conceive her second child, it’s taken her over a year so far and they have no indication of anything wrong. She’s been pregnant 4 times (had 3 miscarriages) but it’s always happened very quickly. She’s younger than me but incredibly stressed about it all though so I do think in her case it’s stress related.

It took about 6 months for me to fall pregnant with DC2 at 36. We went for fertility teats after 3 months because of my age and that of my partner (who was 39 at the time). They were done privately and cost about £300. They showed I had low amh levels, which I was surprised by because my periods have always been pretty regular and I conceived DC1 quite quickly.

Because of the results, I started monitoring my lh surge, measuring my BBT and using a sperm friendly lubricant. I fell pregnant that month. I would recommend monitoring your cycle closely etc and timing when you and your DP do the deed around that, as that will probably maximise your chances. Going for a private fertility check up might also be helpful if you'd be interested in that.

Thank you @clarebear111 that’s interesting to read. It could well be worth having the fertility tests done then, just so I know what’s going on. Can I ask, what do they test for? What does it involve? Also, I have been tracking ovulation with the lots that test for both hormones. I haven’t tracked temp though so perhaps I should be doing that too. It’s all just such a mystery when I fell with my other 2 so easily.

Hi @Toomanychoices123

For me, they took a blood test and did a scan. The blood test was how they were able to know my amh levels, which is a way to gauge your ovarian reserve. It helped me to understand how much time we likely had left to try. The blood test also screened for vitamin deficiencies and that sort of thing. The scan was of my ovaries, and looked at the number of follicles I had at a certain stage in my cycle. I think that was to do with the quality of the remaining eggs. It wasn't overly invasive and was done quite quickly.

For my partner, it was a sperm sample.

Great to hear about the tracking. Has it shown you an identifiable surge?

The BBT measurement was a help too. For it to be most accurate, I think you are supposed to measure it at the same time each day, before you get out of bed. Apparently there is a slight increase in BBT after you ovulate, and if you fall pregnant it stays elevated. I am not an expert at all, but that seems to be the case from what I have read and the advice I have had.

I had also bought the clearblue fertility monitor to use the following month, but I ended up not needing it so it is sat in a cupboard now. Perhaps someone else will have some first hand experience of using it.

Sending you lots of luck and baby dust x

Thanks so much for all that info it definitely helps to know. I guess I just want to know if all of it is worth it or not so I think fertility testing is probably the best way forward for us. Thank you ☺️ so glad you got your little one in the end ❤️

I conceived my first within about 3 months but then had a miscarriage. It took me 15 months to conceive after that, next one took about 3 months, then again it took me just over a year to conceive next time and my fourth child took just 1 month. Age wasn’t really a factor in me because I was 17, 19, 21, 25 and 27 at the times of conception. I think sometimes it’s when you stop focusing on it so much it just happens. Strangely it turned out the pregnancy’s that took over a year to conceive where both boys and the quick conceptions were both girls.

I have just come across this post as i have just posted something really similar. I too fell pregnant within the first two months with both children. We have been trying for 6 months for a 3rd and not had any luck. I am 33. I just wondered how you are getting on?

Hello,

sorry to hear you’ve been struggling. I fell pregnant in Nov last year and I’m currently 19 weeks so it finally happened for us ☺️ I honestly thought it wouldn’t and I actually said to my other half, this will be the last month of trying…and it happened! I think perhaps already having 2 children, lots more going on and being a bit older made it take a bit longer. I really hope it happens for you soon. Don’t give up hope! x

@Toomanychoices123 That’s amazing news, so lovely to hear.
Congratulations 😊

Thank you, i hope so too x

My SIL had her first child at 34 and was never able to conceive again, despite fertility treatment. Turns out she had started perimenopause shortly after the birth of her first baby.

Im so sorry to hear that 🙁 it’s so hard when you’ve already had a baby, you just assume everything will happen the same as before. My sister has struggled for over a year to conceive her second and has had sadly 2 miscarriages. She is now about to start IVF.