35 weeks and feeling really tearful and oversensitive...

[wibbleymum]

I'm 35 weeks now with baby no 1, have had a fairly easy pregnancy, but I'm feeling pretty terrible at the moment. I'm anxious, oversensitive, finding it impossible to make decisions, and feel like bursting into tears at any moment. DH tells me to get a grip and I know I'm impossible to be with right now but don't seem to be able to get over it.

Have just been through a fairly stressful house move which probably doesn't help... new house is full of boxes and we haven't got a proper nursery here or nursery furniture.

Could this partly be hormonal? Anyone else had a similar experience? Or is it just me being a stressball (I am fairly prone to anxiety at the best of times). Anything I can do about it? And if I'm struggling now, does it mean I'll end up with post natal depression?

Towards the end of my pregnancy, I cried at the slightest hint of a criticism, I was so gormless I locked my car in a car park overnight, didn't sleep, lost my rag with dh at least three times a day. I think it's just a really stressful time - hormones all over the place, realising there's no going back, worry about the birth and the unexpectedness of it all. And yes, I ended up with PND, but IMO most women do, whether it gets diagnosed or not.
One thing that really helped me with the anxiety was to make a list of tasks before I went to bed each night and stick it on the kitchen door. Then I could sleep soundly knowing I wouldn't forget anything. Sounds daft, but worked for me.
have some warm baths, get out in the fresh air, and tell your dh that he should try growing a person in his belly for nine months, figure out how to get it out, then get a grip

I am about the same number of weeks as you with DC2. I wouldnt describe myself as anxious, etc but I sure am in a stinking mood all the time! I have put it down to hormones and being totally fed up of being pregnant. I have been manically trying to sort the house out which has completely exhausted me. I set myself up to finish something and then I am too tired or DD plays up and I get so cross with myself. I think its the nesting instinct kicking in. Probably the same for you. We were in the process of moving when I was preg with DD and I remember having a huge hissy fit because I had no where to put her stuff. Myabe try and get the babys room reaosnably sorted and that might help. Re: PND. I have no knowledge of this but I would have thought you just need to get your home a bit more sorted and put the rest down to hormones. Pregnancy can be rotten at times!Soon be over though.

hi there. i have 2 little ones, most recent being 15 weeks tomorrow. i was really weepy and stressed throughout most of my second pregnancy - lot of other things going on that might have contributed to this (work stresses, home stresses and having to deal with a young infant already whilst being pregnant). however, i think it is fairly normal to feel rubbish during pregnancy, not everyone blooms and feels great like the adverts suggest. i read an article a while back on ante-natal depression (not sure if correct term but you get my drift), suggesting a hell of a lot of people suffer from this, very under-reported, needs to be more discussion about it and better treatment methods etc. i went to my GP about 2/3 of way through pregnancy, and he referred me to a counselling service, and i carried on seeing someone after birth as well - really helped tbh someone just acknowledging that i was having problems, and someone to listen. can i suggest you dh saying get a grip is not v helpful! my dh is a bit like that sometimes but when i collapsed on the bed one night and just cried my eyes out, think he realised i was really quite low, and was v supportive. talk to people about it, talk to friends/family/other mums on mumsnet, at least to acknowledge that you're not alone, and that people really do care about you and the problems you are having. i don't think you need necessarily to be worried about post-natal dep, as article i read said many people felt much better once baby delivered. i did carry on feeling pretty low for a good few weeks, but probably as dd2 had/has colic, so hard going for anyone. take care of yourself at this time, really important to get lots of rest, and do lots of things that make you feel good - go to the cinema, go shopping (if you can manage it!), go out with dh for dinner etc, have quiet time to yourself reading/watching TV, all your favourite things, as honestly, once the little one comes along, you will crave time to do these things - but bear in mind, the mad period of a young baby does pass quite quickly, so don't get anxious about that too! all the very best to you.

oh lovey, you will be ok.

you are 35 weeks pregnant. you need to go easy on yourself and
ignore your dh - sometimes men just really don't get it, not because they are being nasty, just beacuse they have no idea what you are going through and are more than likely a little bit worried themselves

I felt like I was going a bit loopy from 35 weeks onwards, by the time I was 41 weeks I was proper bonkers! crying, screaming at dh, thinking I was doing everything wrong, just generally utterly miserable, which was made all the worse as everyone expects you to be happy!

remember posting on mn about it actually, got some lovely and positive feedback so you are in the right place

sending you lots of hugs. remember it is all NORMAL behaviour for a heavily pregnant woman!

oh yes, and even though I thought I would end up with pnd I didnt. and if you do, you will be looked after by your health visitor and by mumsnet. so dont worry.

Just said to dh that I think I might have antenatal depression. big mistake. he now thinks it is going to damage the foetus and that i must go immediately to the gp to "sort it out". sigh.

men are such idiots. disregard his comments, they are not helpful. he is obviously very worried for you and baby which in a way is a good thing, would be much worse if he wasnt!

however, if you believe that talking things over with a gp would help you get some perspective do it. in fact what might be better would be to speak to one of the midwives, they deal with pregnant women every day and the good ones will give you "real" advice and a shoulder to cry on, which might be just what you need right now.

in my humble opinion, I think you are just very very low and fed up. you remind me so much of how I was at this stage, and it will pass, I promise.

IGNORE HIM, you are tired and anxious because you have a lot on your plate...

and it doesn't mean you will automatically get PND either, don't worry about that on top of everything else.

Oh it is totally normal and probably a combination of everything.

Talk to your Midwife, try and get some me time and if you can do some relaxation.

Think DH is just as stressed and not showing it I suggest he goes to see GP tomorrow what is he going to be like when you go into labour LOL

Totally normal reaction to your current circumstances and certainly doesn;t mean you'll get PND. Pregnant women need to feel settled - especially when the due date is looming - this is only natural. Your concern is probably more a sign that you are going to be a good mummy more than anything else.

If your DH can't understand why you might feel the way you do right now don't worry. It is hard for him to understand what you are going through. Telling you to 'get a grip' is not really going to work though is it Do you have family or friends on hand to help or are you all alone like I was? (If I can do it all alone, anyone can - although deeply suspect DDs will be in therapy by the age of 12 )

Good luck with the new baby - those first ever cuddles are wonderful

Yes I feel the same - ready to dissolve into tears at the slightest emotional prod. It IS hormones and being in their grip can be daunting but it is all about your body preparing you for being a Mum so its natural.

I had to tell my DP that when I'm weepy when he goes out its ok - just an extension of the nesting instinct. Nothing freaks some men out more than an emotional/tearful woman. As if we were a threat fgs! But usually it is about fear that they cant do anything about it and sounds like it is out of fear/love rather than malice that your DH is acting. Doesnt help tho!

Its TOTALLY natural that you should feel like this - moving house is the second biggest stressor after bereavement.

{{{{BIG HUGS}}}}