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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Exhausted at 35 weeks

8 replies

Justcallmesarah · 02/09/2023 17:21

Hello,

Just wondering if it normal to be exhausted at 35 weeks?

I'm having to lay down after a few hours 😴

I'm also really emotional which is causing issues with my partner and I.

He is currently in the spare room and we have not spoken in over a week.

This stemed from a midwife letting slip the gender of our unborn child which I really wanted to be a surprise. It's not being a straightforward pregnancy and the baby is going to have a lot of operations potentially, so lots of emotions. When I cried about it he asked me what was wrong (stupid in my opinion) as he was leaving asked again, admittedly I snapped and said I was heavily pregnant and emotional he stormed out, swearing and we have not looked at eachother since.

I've asked him to help with different things such as doing the food shop, as a struggle with the weight and so far he has not so much as looked at me.

Just not feeling very supportive, it's the last couple of weeks and not how I envisioned welcoming a baby into the world.

AIBU, I absolutely appreciate he is going through the emotions and anxiety of what's about to happen but a check in, cup of tea, hug would be nice.

Not sure if it's hormones, exhaustion or circumstances that are coming but it's stressing me out.

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Mummy08m · 02/09/2023 17:23

I think it's pretty normal to be exhausted... try to stay hydrated which might help but you might just have to nap a lot.

I'm not following the story about the argument- why was your OH stupid to ask you what was wrong?

Justcallmesarah · 02/09/2023 17:43

Well that's good. I feel I should be doing more.

I feel it was a stupid comment as the call was on loud speaker, he was there, we both realised what was said, he always wanted to know, I wanted the suprise to see his face when they told us what it was and I got emotional pretty much straight away, once it was said.

So to me all the above would have made it fairly clear what was wrong.

He is pretty moody by nature, I think my tolerance to it is very low ATM which is why I've not given in on this occasion.

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PickledScrump · 02/09/2023 18:19

Midwives tend to say either he or she rather than it, if you are in the UK they don’t take down the sex of the baby so there’s no way your midwife would know the sex. More likely she just says either he or she generally.

Justcallmesarah · 02/09/2023 18:32

Yeah, I know that could be it. It was not the regular midwife it was someone from the specialist team. So I am doubtful that's the case, but thank you. It's the only part of what's to come I was looking forward to.

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PickledScrump · 02/09/2023 18:46

@Justcallmesarah again though generally they don’t make a note of sex or even look at it in the UK unless you request to know at a scan. Even specialists will say he or she as people don’t like their baby being called “it”. It could be that your partner has assumed it was said in a generic way and you have just expected him to know what was wrong when he genuinely has no idea. Hormones can make things hard, especially towards the end when everything is heavy and hard work, but it’s so important to keep communication open and honest with each other, even more so when the baby arrives. He can’t read your mind, you need to speak to him and tell him directly

Justcallmesarah · 02/09/2023 19:28

Thank you, I have considered these things too. Everyone prior has always disclaimed. I refer to baby to he or over baby to see that doesn't necessarily mean I know what it's going to be. This individual did not disclaim anything but I absolutely appreciate it could just be their terminology also.

In regards to my OH, as I said I thought it was pretty obvious why I was upset, I don't think swearing at me and storming out was proportionate. I also thought that it was widely understood that some women can be overly emotional during pregnancy.

The ongoing stalemate is really not helping my stress. I feel like I'm utterly screwed in any support after birth when recovering from a c section and a baby recovering from open heart surgery. If it's like this now.

OP posts:
Bonbontutu · 03/09/2023 06:28

Not talking or looking at you for a week over what seems like a minor argument is nasty though. I had one of those once. Threw him back. Seriously consider whether you're happy to accept that type of behavior when you're in a stronger mindset. It's abusive in my opinion.

He should be looking after you. Pregnancy is exhausting. A cup of tea every now and then is not a big ask. Neither is doing the food shop. I really hurt my nether regions lifting the bags this weekend and I'm a few weeks behind you.

EmmaP1988 · 03/09/2023 07:41

I’m 35 weeks too and really struggling with exhaustion, pelvic pain, sickness again, emotional mess and a husband who seemingly is trying his best but doesn’t understand the level of tiredness I’m dealing with. It sounds like you have much more going on than me, but know that you aren’t alone!!! I can barely look at my husband at the moment he’s annoying me so much 😂. Think it’s to do with this stage and hormones. It’ll get better I’m sure x

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