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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Miscarriage

7 replies

MamaAl27 · 24/08/2023 15:10

Hi all

I was just after some advice really and I don’t know where else to turn currently.
I am currently going through my second miscarriage after an early scan confirmed no heart beat at 6 weeks 5 days.
It has been over a week and with my first I miscarried straight after I found no heartbeat at 8 weeks.
The hospital have said I can have surgical or medical management and I just don’t know what to do for the best. It’s breaking my heart not knowing what to do and as horrible as it sounds it’s awful being in this limbo giving you false hope.

OP posts:
SeeTheWorldAnotherWay · 24/08/2023 15:59

I’m so sorry, and the limbo is draining.
I suspected I started miscarrying at weekend. I was scanned Tuesday and pregnancy sac visible but measuring smaller than my dates should. They were fairly certain I was miscarrying, and oddly I didn’t feel pregnant anymore. I was given the option to wait and see and have another scan in a couple of weeks, or medically help the miscarriage along.
I chose the medical option. I took first pill on Tuesday and have bled and cramped since. I’ve taken the second set of tablets this afternoon and now just waiting.
I didn’t see the point in waiting to rescan because, deep down, I knew I had miscarried.
There is no right or wrong thing to do, just whatever gives you some peace and respite. Much love. Be kind to yourself.

Stephy1024 · 24/08/2023 16:07

I'm so sorry your going through this. It's truly heartbreaking. I had a MMC in April. I started light bleeding about 10 days later so opted for a natural loss. However this turned into retained tissue and about 8 weeks in total bleeding. Still getting positive tests and having to go back for medical management.
If I had to do it again I'd go for medical management personally. With the complications it felt like my body wasn't my own etc.
It's an awful situation but I hope you find what's right for you.

MamaAl27 · 24/08/2023 16:54

Thank you @SeeTheWorldAnotherWay and @Stephy1024. I just didn’t know what to do and I’m sitting here just running through all the scenarios. It’s an awful process for anyone to go through and I am so sorry to the both of you for your losses. I hope you are both healing ❤️ be kind to yourselves and know that your time will come ✨❤️

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HorizontalSupervisor · 25/08/2023 06:37

So I'm currently 10w3 days and baby stopped growing at about 6w2d. I've had no signs or anything, found out on a private scan 2 days ago - we'd only booked it as my partner is working during my NHS one. I'd had an early scan at 6.5weeks where a heartbeat was detected, so was pretty relaxed that baby was measuring a couple of days behind at that point - I ovulate a bit later in my cycle than standard calculators expect. The heart must have stopped a day or two later.

Went to the EPU yesterday where they scanned me again and confirmed the size. I told them my dates, they verbally told me it was a miscarriage but said that they couldn't do anything about it until I have a second NHS scan. So now I have the week to wait even though we know what's going on and I just want the medical management to get it over with. Having had to terminate a pregnancy previously, I know what the medical management is like, and I'd far rather that than the risk of scarring from surgery.

The staff were really kind, but worst of the experience was that there ended up being 5 people including me in the room for my internal ultrasound. A student midwife had asked if she could sit in and I felt too out of body to say no, but then another random visitor whose role wasn't explained just stayed as well, it felt very exposed. With the sonographer and my partner it was an incredibly crowded room.

On top of that, in the waiting room one of the unit staff came in to talk to another patient, who turned out to be her daughter. They stood there jubilating about her early scan right next to a sign asking people to remember that not everyone in the room would be getting good news, and please could they be sensitive to that.

@MamaAl27 I'm along for the ride with you here. Hoping for an easy time for both of us. ❤️

MamaAl27 · 25/08/2023 08:18

@HorizontalSupervisor i am just so sorry you are going through this. Be kind to yourself ❤️ this limbo is just awful and your scenario sounds just like my first miscarriage. I’m here if you need to vent, talk, shout, be angry. It can feel the loneliest in the world ❤️

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Mountainview8 · 25/08/2023 08:38

@MamaAl27 Sorry to hear what you're going through and the limbo stage is the worst. Everyone and each miscarriage is different, so what worked for me isn't necessarily best for you. I let my first miscarriage happen naturally, but decided to go for surgical management the second time which is what I would do again if I have to. Waiting for the appointment was a limbo time when I was constantly watching for a heavy flow to start.

CFB86 · 15/09/2023 21:22

Hello, I have recently had a scan at a private clinic which showed an empty egg sac and no foetal pole, no heartbeat. I had calculated myself to be 8 weeks pregnant to the day. I was referred to the EPU where I had to have an internal scan which showed up two empty egg sacs and a long membrane. The Doctor wasn’t satisfied to make a call on a missed miscarriage so I’ve had to wait a further week for a second internal scan before my options can be discussed. I am in a complete limbo. I am sad and confused and hating my body all at the same time. I’ve been reading a lot of posts about what to do to manage medically/ naturally should the MMC be confirmed, I’m so torn. I’ve never had surgery or been put under. This is my first pregnancy. From my reading it seems that the surgical route appears preferable but I’m still unsure

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