If you have health anxiety and a low pain tolerance, how did you cope with giving birth?

[Jyas]

I know that this sounds silly, but how do people with health anxiety get through birth? I also seem to have a low pain tolerance and due to my health anxiety I get panic attacks when in pain. Obviously vaginal birth as well as a C-section (recovery) is painful and also anxiety-inducing (uncertainty/uncontrollable situation of vaginal birth / lying on the table and being operated on when C-section are the main things that set off my anxiety, apart from the pain).

Which one did you choose?
How did you cope?
Is there anything they can give you to calm anxiety that’s safe for the baby?
Would vaginal birth with early epidural be a good option in my situation?
Can they give you any painkillers that are stronger than paracetamol (for C-section recovery) when breastfeeding - as a plan B, in case I can’t cope with paracetamol only?

I’m not even pregnant yet but I feel I need to have a plan / coping strategy for my anxiety before TTC.

Oh, I'm so sorry this is worrying you! My short answer would be that an epidural and vaginal birth would be the best option from what you've said. As long as you don't live 300 miles from a hospital there will be plenty of time for this (especially with a first baby).

I was prescribed Citalopram in pregnancy and know people who have taken Sertraline, but my doctor was relieved when I decided not to take it. You need to weigh up the balance in your own head about what you feel is best for you.

I hate the idea of C-section (or any operation) so vag was definitely best for me. I would have loved a waterbirth but had to be monitored so couldn't.

Have you considered hiring a doula? Having someone beside you who is experienced but not on the medical team might be reassuring. I felt more in control with my second than my first and it was so much easier to manage the anxiety and pain. I even enjoyed the pushing part, having been absolutely terrified of it the first time round!

I'm happy to answer any questions if it helps. I couldn't have been more anxious the first time I gave birth. Now pregnant with #3 and I'm absolutely fine 🙂

There is loads of help once you’re pregnant. Good classes so you can make informed choices around pain control. Let your midwife know how you’re feeling and they can help / refer from early weeks.

Remember that once pregnant; you will have a lot of hormones that i think help with this sort of thing

When pregnant throw everything you can at it:

Ante natal classes
Hypnobirthing
Positive birth movement meet ups
Look up milli hill and positive birth movement

Thank you for these kind answers, that is reassuring!

Hypnobirthing is a great tool you could try. I used the online pack from The Positive Birth Company & it helped me so much. Honestly between that and yoga I think it helped me have a beautiful labour & delivery. Might have more options with PBC now too as this was 4.5 year ago

I really feel for you OP as I was exactly the same when pregnant with my first and it was not nice.

I would say, if there's anything you feel really strongly about, even by gut instinct, try to make it part of the plan. For me it was an epidural. I'd never had air and gas but when I got to the hospital, they gave it to me. I hated it so the epidural became even more vital for me.

The advice in antenatal classes about when to go to the hospital included, 'or until you can't stand the pain any longer'. So, as soon as the pain was nearing my threshold, we went to the hospital (we only lived 10 minutes away). That was a big reassurance for me in terms of my low pain threshold as I knew I wanted the epidural. I did have to wait for it when at the hospital but it was manageable.

I really didn't want an episiotomy. That and the epidural were the two things I felt very strongly anxious about. Beyond those two things, I actually avoided having a detailed birth plan. I avoided thinking about the birth for long periods of time. I'd acknowledge to myself that I was going to have to do it and then I would consciously think about other things. I had so much anxiety for my baby and his health that the giving birth part became a necessary evil in my head.

The lack of detail in my birth plan meant that I had the reassurance of knowing my two main (controllable) sources of anxiety were covered but if anything went against my birth plan, it wouldn't make me feel like I'd lost control either. In the end, I had an episiotomy and I agreed to it because, at that point, getting my baby to arrive safely became my over riding concern. Having had the epidural made me less worried about the episiotomy as well. I will be honest and say that I'm not sure I would have been the same if it had been the epidural that hadn't gone to plan as it was such a huge thing in my head but I'm hoping it will reassure you at least a little!

Good luck!

Honestly, having an epidural saved my labour. I had to be monitored and induced fairly speedily, and I really didn't cope with the very abrupt onset of contractions, gas and air just made me feel out of control. The epidural just took everything down to a level where I could even get some sleep, and meant that the eventual episiotomy and forceps delivery was painless. Recovery was very quick for me too, by the time the epidural had worn off I was just a bit uncomfy more than in pain. In the same situation, I'd 100% do it again.