Anyone have big age gaps?

[Buttons659]

I’ve just had a BFP today (unplanned and a huge shock) I’m 39 and my eldest is 19.
im freaking out about the age gap.
Has anyone else had such big age gaps? She’ll be nearly 20 when baby is born, which is the same age I was when I had her!

My step kids were 17 & 19 and my daughter was 9 when I had my second. It’s been great as they’re all old enough to help and enjoy being older siblings without the feelings of jealousy. Now I’m having my third with a 2.5 year age gap and honestly I’m far more freaked out this time because I’m not sure how she’ll react with the new baby

Thank you for your reply, that’s really reassuring!

There's 20 years between my eldest and youngest SILs, they have a good relationship as adults.

Congratulations! I have a 19 year age gap between DC1 and DC2. DC1 is autistic so his emotional age is much lower, and is living at home (and likely to continue to do so). I had DC3 4 years later, so we have a odd family of 5, where we are mostly a family of 4 for day trips and general life, though we eat as a family of 5 and we do some holidays with all DCs, some with just the younger ones. We all get on pretty well.

Medical staff will assume you've forgotten everything and treat you as a FTM (unless you had other DC in between?). Lots of parenting advice changed in the 19 years, and the general social rules! I am a bit sheepish about the big age gap (as well as having been a teen mum) so often don't mention DC1 when meeting other mums of young DC.

Hi @Buttons659
I had my bfp today, I was going to post something similar. Albeit not as big gap as your but I am 31
My step son has just turned 16 and my son is 14 (in 3 weeks)
I was worried about a big age gap but I was so young when I had my boy and there wasn't a good time for another. I'm recently married and this baby is planned.
I'm sure your daughter will be a great big sis. And congrats!

Thank you all so much for your lovely replies, they really are helping me so much.
I have an 8 year old too, but more worried how the older one will feel about this.
mom also worried about my age. I was 20 when I had my first and 31 when I had my second. I’m gonna be 40 with this one and I feel like I will get a lot of judgement.
I guess I have a lot to get my head around!

@Buttons659 I'm 40 and just found out I'm pregnant. Completely by accident. I have one son who is 6 and will be nearly 7 when baby is born all being well. Not quite the big gap you have! I feel it's not ideal being 40 (will be 41) when baby comes but hey, life is full of surprises!

I did have a close friend at Uni who had a sister who was born right before he started and we were both 18. Seemed fine really.

Don’t be surprised if your 19 year old is enormously grossed out when you tell her. I remember a friend whose parents had a baby when we were 16 and we were all horrified that they were still having sex at 41! 😂

I'm 38 and i've got an 18 year old and a 9 month old. It's fine, we all muddle along. DS was brilliant at helping me with chores when DD was born.

I'm 37, I'm 6 months pregnant and my children are 18, 15 and 14...they can't wait for baby to arrive 🥰

My step daughter is 18 and my daughter is 11. They are both really excited.

My nan had a 30 year age gap between eldest and youngest. Though she had 12 kids total😉

Hi,
I'm 38, 39 when baby will born and my kids will be, 19, 17 and 15 when baby is born.
I was a young mum, had my eldest at 19 and married at 20. I thought I was done, but then my husband passed away and a few years later I met my now partner and we're having a baby together 😱

I do feel like a first time mum, I told my partner last night I've forgotten how to look after a newborn 🙈

My step kids are 22, 20 and 15 and absolutely great with my 1 year old. Absolutely don't freak out, she will love it, and more importantly - she can help!! Congratulations xx

Congratulations! Mine are 7,9,23 & 25 and they are so close and have so much fun together. She might be shocked initially but I’m sure they’ll have a fabulous relationship.

There's 21 years between my two daughters! I had DD1 when I was 19; she is now 22. I then had DD2 a week off 40 (she is 17 months). DD1 ADORES DD2. She absolutely dotes on her. It's also a good contraceptive for DD1 as she realises how much work a baby is 😂

DD1 moved back home when DD2 was three days' old, so they're very close.

Mine were 15 and 17. They love ds to bits. It's a bit more like a very close auntie relationship. They also play with him, do sleepovers and babysit. Tbh the harder bit was having a baby in my late 30's its exhausting