Midwife

[Jessabby89]

Hii,

just looking to see if this is the norm or not.

I've been with my midwife since 9weeks however I just don't feel like the appointments are worth it. I see her and all that happens is she checks my BP, my urine and also my co2 levels then has a listen of my sons heart beat and that is it.

she kept telling me we would look at ... in the next appointment then the next appointment would come and we didn't look into anything over than the basic checks again.

I text her just asking for general advice and I either get ignored or she rings me back and calls me someone else's name lol!

I have an appointment with her on Thursday for a Sweap but speaking to her this morning she didn't have a clue that was booked in and tried to book me in on Thursday at a different time for bloods. I had to say I'm already in why is time changing for her to say " are you "

i don't want to be a cow but it just doesn't fill me with confidence at all. Is everyone having this experience or just me ?

thanks

Are you in the UK?

I'm afraid I'm not really clear on what you mean when you say you've been with the midwife 9 weeks.

In the the UK it's set out quite clearly what will happen at each appointment and they are all as you describe which go:

Blood pressure
Urine test
Doppler
Any questions?

The only slightly different ones are the booking appointment, 28 week bloods, 36 week appointment (when you would usually confirm birth plan), and your standard scans.

Might vary slightly by trust but that's the gist of it.

What are you asking for that you aren't getting?

Yes I am in the uk.

what I mean by 9 weeks is I've been with the same woman since being 9 weeks pregnant.

and tbf it just feels like the appointments are rushed especially the fact she rings me and calls me someone else's name and doesn't even remember having me in for appointments.

Mine felt exactly the same when i was pregnant. Complete waste of time, if it makes you feel any better the midwives in the delivery suite were absolitely fantastic.

I went into labour not knowing anything, never given a birthing plan. I just took comfort knowing my baby was being checked.

Health Visitors also useless, turned up once. Ignored any messages or calls i make. so prepare for that lol.

Eee it sounds awful but I'm glad it's not just me overthinking things.

yeah that's the only good part about it is hearing his heartbeat and knowing he's ok in there. I had to ask twice to complete my birthing plan to which I was told ahh you just go through this ok the badger notes.

thats all well and good but this is my first child I have 0 clue what's on offer 😂

how long are you with the midwife for? Does she stop after you've had the baby or does she do home visits does anyone know?

Thanks

I understand that there are other things you're concerned about but how on earth is checking your blood pressure, your urine and baby's heart beat a 'complete waste of time'. Surely these are all really important things to ensure nothing is wrong with you and baby.

Not sure why your just focusing on that one comment when much more has been said on the post...

it's regarding the fact the information you are given is lacking.

Yeah i had the same. If im honest i'm quite glad i went in with no plan, because it meant i wasn't stuck on any one idea.

I (luckily) had a great first labour and i do think part of it was because i just went with the flow and did whatever my body needed to get through.

So i only ever saw the same midwife twice, i usually saw different people every time.

'My' widwife came to the house the day after i went home to check on us, then i visisted the hospital on days 3, 5, 7 and was discharged day 10.

Yes she should be going over information with you and giving your advice. I’m sorry you’re not receiving this.
The checks that she’s doing are very important but I can understand your frustration at not being given the information she’s said she’ll provide.
I would take time researching on the internet and reading NHS pages for the info you want, there is no need to go into labour unprepared when there is a wealth of information online

The most useful thing I did first time around was a free antenatal class as my hospital if yours does something similar. They showed the different instruments for ventouse, forceps etc and talked through all the pain relief options and logistics of coming into the hospital. Was really useful. Maybe see if your trust offers that.

Have you been to antenatal class? They tend to be where the information is given really.

No I have just been watching antenatal videos online as my midwife said that none face to face was happening anymore since covid.

i have tried to do as much research as possible not sometimes it's easier to have a conversation about it isn't it.

Im not usual a one to complain and my midwife is so lovely but just today when she didn't even know I was booked in to do my sweap on Thursday after she only booked it with me in person on Friday was mental.

Sorry if it comes across as ranting I just wanted to know if anyone else had been through similar

Forgetting that she'd booked you for a sweep is probably a symptom of her being busy. It's not great, because it confused you and left you feeling like you weren't being treated properly. If you're still concerned I'd tell her that quite clearly at the next appointment.

Then I'd ask whatever questions you have at the moment and write down her answers. Sometimes people are more alert to what they're saying when it's obvious you're documenting it too.

Have you talked about labour and delivery?

Yeah my antenatal care was shite as well.

The hospital care and postnatal care were much better.