I think I’m in line for a promotion, should I tell work I’m pregnant?

[glasspaw]

I’ll keep the details fairly vague so as not to out my employer here.

I’ve worked for the same company for a number of years and am now acting in a senior capacity. I’ve had several discussions about my pay being out of line with the market for my role and have been promised (but never in writing) that some upcoming structure changes in a few months will enable my manager to get me into a position that is appropriately titled and remunerated for the work I’m doing.

I’m currently in week 6 of pregnancy. I have a good relationship with my boss but don’t know how he might be in this situation. I don’t want him to feel I’m betraying his trust by not saying anything, particularly when we are planning projects which aren’t due to start until next year…but I also feel like I need to protect myself and get the salary increase under my belt before saying anything.

I’m very conflicted, and would appreciate any advice from people who have been in similar positions.

I definitely would not tell them. I know maternity protections exist but if they chose to discriminate, enforcing them can be costly and stressful. It’s early days pregnancy wise, I would wait until you had the promotion all signed off and were further along personally.

Six weeks is very early. You will be around doing the job for at least another 30 weeks, and then I assume returning after maternity leave. IMO no need to say anything unless your job entails working in an area that is dangerous for you and the baby.

I'd leave it for now too. You're very early and like PP said you've got plenty of time to do your promotion!

I'm pregnant, around 11 weeks. Not told employer yet. But I'm not in line for a promotion. 😂 I am hoping to hide it as long as I can. I'm not skinny so hoping that I will be able to hide it as long as poss. Know there's a legal requirement but I will say I found out late xx

I wouldn't even think of telling him. It's none of his business.

I second what @Kingsparkle said. You’re very early in the pregnancy, so it shouldn’t be expected that you’d tell them anyway.

Get the promotion, get the extra pay, and do not feel guilty about it. From the sounds of it this is a long time coming. You can still plan projects for next year - they’ll just have to get maternity cover - not your problem if they don’t.

Women spend too much time thinking about what their boss will think, or how they might put on their colleagues. Men generally don’t and they go for the opportunities when they see them, and they earn 20% more than us 🙄

I wouldn't be telling employers at six weeks unless there was a healthcare risk associated with your pregnancy. I would however be pushing your employer a bit harder - why should you have to wait months to be adequately rewarded for your job?

@ES1986 - your last paragraph is so true. This year I’ve been repeatedly saying to myself “would a man worry about this”. It’s really helped me gain confidence in the workplace.

I feel your pain!

I was due a job interview to be promoted and the morning before my interview I found out I was pregnant!

I did pull out of the interview for various reasons:

A) I was likely to need time off during the pregnancy for health related reasons.

B) I knew I would be taking a year off minimum after I had the baby.

C) I knew the other two women really wanted the promotion and I didn’t want to potentially take the opportunity away from them when the job was no longer a priority of mine.

This is a really fair challenge.

I wasn’t thinking of mentioning it right now, but I know the structure changes are likely to be around halfway through the pregnancy so it’s going to get to the point where I’m having to actively hide the bump before I have confirmation.

I wish women didn’t still have to worry about this stuff in 2023.

If the structure changes are planned for within the next 3 to 4 months, I'd be pushing your manager for more information (preferably in writing). Maybe you could suggest you are happy to wait the 3-4 months but you need some certainty over the role in the meantime?

No. You are under no obligation to tell work you are pregnant until 25 weeks. So absolutely keep it to yourself.

No, you won't get the promotion. You are under no legal obligation to tell them

You don't need to tell them until 25 weeks (15 weeks before your due date).

If there are any health risks (e.g. working with chemicals, lots of heavy lifting etc) you might want to tell them ASAP so they can risk assess!

If you start feeling ill (first trimester can be rough - that was definitely the worst in my first pregnancy!) it may be helpful to tell them but you don't have to. You are also entitled to paid time off for antenatal appointments but I'm not sure how that works if they don't know about the pregnancy!

If you continue to feel fine I would probably avoid telling them unless you really trust them not to delay your promotion because of it though - while you shouldn't be discriminated against I don't know how easy it would be to prove that you didn't get a promotion because you are pregnant! Are these discussions in writing (or email) - it might be worth making sure there is something in writing as soon as you can just in case (preferably before any pregnancy sickness kicks in!).

Sadly the sickness is very much already here. I’ve coped so far but only because we have an office closure so I’ve been wfh.

he’s always careful not to put anything in writing until it’s 100% which is what’s making me nervous.

thanks everyone for your replies. I think you’ve confirmed my suspicion that the only way I can look out for my own interests here is to keep quiet until it’s cemented.

Definitely do not!
My work friend did - she was the clearly best suited for the role (Financial controller). Lo and behold the company decided to change the structure instead getting 3 team leads reporting directly to the CFO .... such a transparent move.

Avoiding putting things in writing does sound suspicious... If you do need time off and need a doctor's note (for longer than 5 days off), you can ask them not to say it's pregnancy related. Fingers crossed you get your promotion soon, and I hope the sickness improves quickly for you as well!

Don't tell them until at least 12 weeks, and I'd leave it later if necessary to secure appraisals and promotions. Not least because you want to know you achieved those things independently to any pregnancy announcement.

Continue to plan the projects for next year. They need planning, and the company will recruit someone else to take your role while you're off

You have no legal obligation to notify them until 25 weeks, unless you need risk assessing in the meantime. Keep Schtum.

Sounds like they aren't chomping at the bit to give you what you are worth anyways, so you are right to be cautious about how much you tell them, and to wonder whether they will try and wangle out of promoting you.

Hi,
just wanted to ask what you did for this scenario? Did you end up telling your boss

No

No