Help - TTC and having a wobble (anxiety related)

[Cinai]

TTC my first for a few months, this was well planned and discussed and it is a good time now - financial security, solid relationship etc.

But I’m having a wobble…my main problem is health anxiety, I’m so scared about pregnancy, the changes in my body, and giving birth (vaginally or c-section) that I think I can’t go ahead with this. I’m also anxious that I couldn’t cope with a baby and that my anxiety (I generally suffer from anxiety but I’m not on medication) will go through the roof. I would not only worry about my own health but also worry that something with my baby is wrong, and all this on little sleep.

I don’t know what to do…I’m 40 so I can’t postpone, but not that it would help anyway, my anxiety won’t go away.

Does anyone else struggle with health anxiety and general anxiety and manage to navigate pregnancy and a baby?

Hi i read this and thought i have to reply. I am honestly exactly like you described. I have health anxiety, general anxiety and just deal with it myself no meds. I have the exact same fears as you with babies and pregnancy. So i fell pregnant unplanned 3 years ago and it shocked me and frightened me but honestly i was excited too. Every day i was anxious and googling everything and it was hard but there is something about being pregnant that changes you. I felt protective and different. However i went on to have a miscarriage and suddenly it wasnt happpening for me. (I am told continually this is NOT caused by anxiety, my MC was tested as chromosomally abnormal).This is where i changed and it made me want one even more. Fast forward i have now had 3 MC's and of course they werent pleasant but i feel that they have made me a stronger person. I have now even undergone IVF when i am scared of injections and injected myself.

You will not realise how strong you are until you have to be and i believe you can. You need to focus on getting yourself mentally the best you can and tell the midwife doctors etc who can help. i did find councelling helped. I absolutely hate saying this but my advise is just dont leave it too long and dont let your fears choose your life for you. I was 34 when i had my first MC and im now nearly 38 and still trying. Pregnancy is scary, i think a lot of women would say the same if they were honest. I wish you the best of luck and if you really want one, you WILL be able to cope with plenty of support. Please realise you are not alone with how you feel.

Thank you so much @Flowerlover010, this is really kind and reassuring. I’m so sorry to hear about your MCs, I hope everything will work out for you!

@Cinai if you ever want to chat please do because we sound very similar in how we feel and it can be very isolating and lonely x