9 weeks pregnant and feeling so anxious and negative

[CarnelianArtist]

Hi everyone,

Sorry for a big moan as I appreciate many out there have it far worse. I'm just really struggling, whilst I've faced anxiety in the past this is different- I feel a sense that something is about to go very wrong and I can't get my brain to see the positive in anything. I just hope it goes.

We really wanted a second child (out first is 4) but now I'm pregnant I feel so anxious and down. I also have a cold that's making me feel sick. I'm worried I'm getting fat and look awful- I'm not pretty so being slim is the only way I look decent. But I'm also hungry at night. I'm on antibiotics for bv and worried it wont clear up and what if I can't breastfeed because I really liked feeding my first - though I think it's OK for baby either way I just can't imagine not doing it.

I'm trying to get our 4 year old not to co sleep, sometimes we have some success other nights he's waking 5 times a night as he's worried I'm not there. Last night I seriously thought why am I even having this baby. Then I got worried that all this stress is bad for it. I think what if he won't sleep by himself.

The project I'm leading at work has daily challenging deadlines, I was reluctant to take time off but just took two days. Im lucky my manager is amazing and is moving things along to some degree. I can hardly face going back as I feel like the everyday stressed I used to face like people disagreeing are just too much!

We can't stay on top of the housework as I'm not doing my share. And my husband is on a business trip for a week abroad so I'm worried about. There are constant problems with our new house - ant infestation, subsidence of conservatory and the life admin and cost that goes with it.

Any advice on how to feel better? I know my situation isnt really bad - my husband is lovely, I have a good job and we dont have financial problems (though i do worry about the no of issues were having to pay for re the house).

Thanks for reading.
Is this a pregnancy thing? What can I do as I'd like to be like my old mostly positive self.

Hormones will not be helping! Apparently pregnancy hormones can make anxiety a lot worse than it would otherwise be. I'm a very anxious person and struggling (second pregnancy, first ended in MMC) so I feel your pain. You'll see on the forums there's tons of us feeling a similar way, so you're definitely not alone. Have you joined the thread for your due month? It's a really great way to get support from people at a similar stage of their pregnancy to you x

Hey lovely,

Wasn't going to read and run.

I'm with you 100% on the feeling of something is about to go very wrong. I can't shake that feeling and my OH can't understand it, although he really tries to be supportive with everything. I've already had one early scan and because of a lot of cramping that I was reassured was nothing a week or so ago, I've had to call the midwives again and express my concern. They've booked me in for another scan tomorrow but now I've got this immense feeling of guilt that if everything turns out to be ok, I've wasted everyone's time.

I think all your worries are enhanced due to hormones, and your concerns are more than valid. I struggle when OH goes away for one night so I can't even imagine how you're feeling about a week.

You're not alone though, that's what these forums are for. There's so much support on here. And sometimes it's just nice to get it off your chest and have someone say "I get it"

Hope you're feeling more positive soon x

Thanks, that's really nice.
cc@moosey89 ctually I see below now in related thread there are others. I'll try to join the forum for my due date.

@cossie13 that's similar yes everytime something goes slightly wrong I end up thinking the worst. Like we had a blocked drain one company couldn't fix and I was thinking what if its never fixed. Then another company fixed it, but I'm like this with everything.

@CarnelianArtist exactly this. If you're 9 weeks, you'll be due Jan, same as me. Here's the link to the Jan group

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/pregnancy/4827707-due-january-2024-part-3