How did you cope with no support?

[finallypregnant]

Neither of us have any family in the UK. We do have friend's but they all work full-time and have their own lives and live a fair bit away.
Hubby is saving his holidays to attach to his paternity leave but I worry about having other support - so many people talk about having their mum or mum in law who comes in everyday to help out etc. I just don't have that.

My MIL who was my main support has just died. My DS is 9 and I am due again in april. Its really hard work just these few months. I guess you just have to get your head down and accept that this is life now.

Try to network with others in your area and make sure you get out with baby as much as you can.

Hope that things go ok for you.

For me it was just a case of getting on with it... being totally prepared, having everything you need ready etc. I didn't even have MN back then, not sure how I coped!

I didn't have anyone close by, so I took full advantage of every possible opportunity to get out and meet people.

Join the NCT - you can meet other people who are in your situation and they can help you.

Go to bfing support groups if you plan to bf.

Join a Mum and Baby group.

Use MN whenever possible.

Try to build up a rapport with your local health centre/gp, so that if you have any concerns you feel comfortable asking for help.

Some people find getting a doula very helpful - it this interests you look into it

here

You just do - we never had any support and all parents are in the country. After ds was born my mother turned up wanting supper cooked for her NCT were a lifesaver for me especially one friend who is still a very close friend 4 years and 3 pregnancies on. If you can afford it, get a maternity nurse for the first couple of weeks - but - it is expensive as I'm sure you can imagine. You'll be ok.

I suppose it is the fear of not knowing and I am sure we will be fine. My plan is to join as many clubs and classes as I can.

We intend on hiring a cleaner for 3 months too so I can get out rather than thinking I have to clean the bathroom!

I suppose it is the fear of not knowing and I am sure we will be fine. My plan is to join as many clubs and classes as I can.

We intend on hiring a cleaner for 3 months too so I can get out rather than thinking I have to clean the bathroom!

oh you'll manage fine! definitely get a cleaner and go out once a day and go to every group at least once and work out which ones you like the best. We have had no support at all and it's perfectly ok. One thing I would say is for the first few weeks, cooking dinner is tricky so plan ahead / buy ready meals and add a fresh salad or just accept it will take you a couple of hours to do instead of half an hour! Also - baby will want a sleep about an hour and a half or so after it has woken up in the morning (i.e. if it woke at 7, it would be asleep again by 8:30) - I used to just stay in bed and get up at the next wakeup after that - I felt completely human (well almost) for the day, which I wouldn't have done otherwise.