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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Partner doesn't want baby

7 replies

Izzycharlieollie · 22/06/2023 06:45

Morning
I found out I was pregnant on Tuesday. Long story short we've been trying for over 2 years but have gotten nowhere so decided to give up and start enjoying life, like going on holidays etc.
we also bought a bigger house and took on a bigger mortgage, luckily before the massive interest hike 🙈

Anyway we didn't use protection always said what will be will be and somehow it's happened and I'm over the moon . . . Him not so much. He says we can't afford it and said we'll have no quality of life till we're at least 60, we're both 38.
I was a young mum, had 3 by the time I was 23, was 19 when my eldest was born and he's coming up to 19, my youngest is 14 and my middle child is 16, just left school. My kids are with my husband who passed away 4 years ago.
He has a daughter from a previous relationship who's 9, he absolutely dotes on her, they're as thick as thieves and he's a brilliant dad.

I really want this baby but he's adamant we don't, I do get what he's saying, especially as I l spent my youth bringing up babies but as much as I like my holidays and little luxuries I am prepared to but it all on hold to bring this baby up.

He says he loves me and he's going nowhere either way but I'm scared if I go ahead and have the baby he'll resent it and me.
I really don't know what to do

If you've got this for thank you for reading

OP posts:
Grumpigal · 22/06/2023 06:50

If he didn’t want a baby he shouldn’t have been having unprotected sex.

You’re over the moon and wanted a baby. There’s your answer.

Tell him you’re going to keep the baby you have been trying for and if he feels he may resent you then he is welcome to take his shit and crack on.

DustyLee123 · 22/06/2023 07:18

Keep your baby. He should have used contraception/had the snip if he doesn’t want children.
Do not be bullied into something you may regret for the rest of your life.

Redpanda21 · 22/06/2023 09:40

i agree with pp, don’t be bullied into having an abortion.

He obviously wanted one at some point for you to be trying for 2 years. He should’ve had the snip if he didn’t want anymore

Ged94 · 22/06/2023 11:31

I cannot believe he would put you in this position after agreeing "whatever will be will be". I'd be absolutely fuming.

Do whatever is best for you xx

daysleepers · 22/06/2023 11:34

You are over the moon.. have your baby!!

He can't change his mind when it happens to suit him. He could have prevented if he wanted.

Enjoy your pregnancy and pending baby!!

allgoodthings84 · 22/06/2023 13:04

Have your planned baby! You both agreed to use no protection so it’s a planned baby. He can’t be surprised than unprotected sex will usually end up in pregnancy at some point (in most cases)

Izzycharlieollie · 22/06/2023 18:27

Thank you everyone.

He has come around now, think the initial shock had him panicking. All being well, fingers crossed 🤞 we'll have our longed for baby in February 😊

Just panicking about everything that can go wrong going wrong. Had a previous miscarriage before my youngest was born and now I'm 15 years older I am very nervous 😬

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