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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Birthing after tearing in previous birth

29 replies

amispeakingintongues · 21/06/2023 20:21

Due in November and concerned about tearing again. Second degree tear in my first birth 2 years ago and the stitches were as painful as the birth. I've always felt my stitches were too tight, took a good 12 months for sex not to feel painful anymore. Even today i have some tightness, so now i'm convinced my chances of tearing the second time around are now even higher.

Anyone had a similar experience?

OP posts:
DidyouNO · 21/06/2023 20:32

I had a 2nd, potentially 3rd degree tear with my first. Two years later no tear at all. I was shocked! Same thing happened with my third DC. He was huge, had a 2nd degree tear. With my 4th DC. No tear. Honestly there's no way of telling but being nervous 😬 s normal. Congratulations, wishing you all the best though.

nnamechangee · 21/06/2023 20:35

I had 2nd degree tear with my first baby and no tears with baby 2&3

HigatusFigatus · 21/06/2023 20:36

3rd degree tear with my first. No tearing with my second 2.5 years later. Had episiotomy both times.

Congratulations and good luck!

pecanpie101 · 21/06/2023 20:49

I had a 2nd degree with both babies. Second child came really quickly so the tear was slightly
Worse but was stitched better and I healed quicker.
Good luck OP!

SteakChips · 21/06/2023 20:53

I had 3A degree tear and while i was having surgery the surgeon, expressed if I had any more i will definitely tear again... lucky i was having the one. Good luck

Notellinganyone · 21/06/2023 21:03

Tore with first but two subsequent water births and was fine, Third one was 9lbs and no problem. I really think it was the water that made the difference.

Barleysugar86 · 21/06/2023 21:06

2nd degree tear with my first (and a couple of midwife made ones on top), no tearing or cuts with my second.

Also felt my stitches from the first didn't feel quite right for a long time but don't notice it anymore.

Flittingaboutagain · 21/06/2023 21:13

After a second degree tear with my first baby as I walked into delivery suite the second thing I said to the midwife was I don't want another tear. She said we'll do our best. Make sure you listen to me if I say to stop pushing.

She applied a warm compress to my perineum at the point my baby was crowning. She let me do my thing and told me to keep going. No tears.

tealandteal · 21/06/2023 21:16

I had a second degree tear with my first, very slight graze with my second 5 years later.

leopard22 · 21/06/2023 21:25

Watching with pained interest, 3b the first time round 6yrs ago but never any problems thanks to a good stitch up - now carrying my second and the thought of it happening again is enough to make me feel sick (more than I already do 😅)

Gloopyhoop · 21/06/2023 21:35

Borderline 3rd degree with my first, stitches were worse than the birth 😩
Small graze with the second that needed no attention and honestly, I wouldn't have known was there if they didn't tell me.
Nothing at all with baby 3.

ecuse · 21/06/2023 21:42

I had a second degree tear and stitches with my first. No pain relief because I'd had an epidural and the midwife told me it would still be working. It wasn't! Like youz the stitches were worse than the birth for me.

Expected to tear in the same place but didn't. The midwife did tell me to stop pushing at certain times and I did though, which I think helped.

For my first the midwife wasn't watching whilst I was pushing... She was busy looking the other way telling her colleague that I was too overweight to push a baby out and that she should prep me for a C-section. Three pushes and the baby plonked out onto the bed between my legs without the midwife even having turned back round 🤣 possibly if she'd been watching and told me to slow it down I might have managed not to tear.

bananaapples · 21/06/2023 22:20

I had a second degree year with my first but no tear at all with my second. I had a home water birth with my second and I'm sure that helped.

PickledScrump · 21/06/2023 22:27

I could have written the same thing. I had a second degree tear and the stitches were awful, took about 18 months for sex not to be painful. I worried with my second but honestly had an absolute dream birth. I had a water birth and only had a graze, didn’t need any stitches, had a bit of swelling but felt fine after a few days.

annlee3817 · 21/06/2023 22:27

Second degree tear with my first, but to be fair the stitches didn't bother me at all afterwards. Second baby no tears at all, both different births, first nice and calm on MLU and the second was an induction.

atthebottomofthehill · 21/06/2023 23:00

My vag actually felt better after the second one, almost like the north corrected the wrongs of the first one.

Do a load of perineal massage to soften it all up. Talk to someone if you need to work through trauma ahead of the birth.

Good luck!

Original poster
amispeakingintongues · 22/06/2023 12:38

SteakChips · 21/06/2023 20:53

I had 3A degree tear and while i was having surgery the surgeon, expressed if I had any more i will definitely tear again... lucky i was having the one. Good luck

Oh my goodness i'm pleased you recovered! Yes don't blame you for not wanting that drama again! Tears are awful

OP posts:
Original poster
amispeakingintongues · 22/06/2023 12:39

DidyouNO · 21/06/2023 20:32

I had a 2nd, potentially 3rd degree tear with my first. Two years later no tear at all. I was shocked! Same thing happened with my third DC. He was huge, had a 2nd degree tear. With my 4th DC. No tear. Honestly there's no way of telling but being nervous 😬 s normal. Congratulations, wishing you all the best though.

Interesting ! My babies aren't usually big so i dread to think what a big baby tear would be like

OP posts:
Original poster
amispeakingintongues · 22/06/2023 12:40

nnamechangee · 21/06/2023 20:35

I had 2nd degree tear with my first baby and no tears with baby 2&3

Reassuring, thanks

OP posts:
Original poster
amispeakingintongues · 22/06/2023 12:41

Barleysugar86 · 21/06/2023 21:06

2nd degree tear with my first (and a couple of midwife made ones on top), no tearing or cuts with my second.

Also felt my stitches from the first didn't feel quite right for a long time but don't notice it anymore.

I'm hoping this is my story too!

OP posts:
Original poster
amispeakingintongues · 22/06/2023 12:42

leopard22 · 21/06/2023 21:25

Watching with pained interest, 3b the first time round 6yrs ago but never any problems thanks to a good stitch up - now carrying my second and the thought of it happening again is enough to make me feel sick (more than I already do 😅)

Totally get it. I might even go as far as saying it's worse than birth

OP posts:
PurBal · 22/06/2023 12:42

I was told tearing is less likely in subsequent pregnancies. I did, but only because I pushed out a giant baby whose head size wasn’t on the graph.

Original poster
amispeakingintongues · 22/06/2023 13:10

PickledScrump · 21/06/2023 22:27

I could have written the same thing. I had a second degree tear and the stitches were awful, took about 18 months for sex not to be painful. I worried with my second but honestly had an absolute dream birth. I had a water birth and only had a graze, didn’t need any stitches, had a bit of swelling but felt fine after a few days.

This is so good to read! Thank you for sharing

OP posts:
Original poster
amispeakingintongues · 22/06/2023 13:11

PurBal · 22/06/2023 12:42

I was told tearing is less likely in subsequent pregnancies. I did, but only because I pushed out a giant baby whose head size wasn’t on the graph.

Oh wow! Well done!!

OP posts:
Babdoc · 22/06/2023 13:20

The secret to comfortable stitches is

  1. not to insert them too tightly,
  2. space them well out, and
  3. leave room for some post repair swelling. I had mine done both times by my consultant colleague, rather than a midwife or junior doc, and they were absolutely fine. The only pain was from a tiny (unstitched) tear close to the urethral orifice, which was v nippy when peeing. Make sure whoever does your stitching is experienced and willing to listen that you don’t want them pulled tight!