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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Epidural

31 replies

RGxo13 · 28/05/2023 11:50

Hi everyone. I’m 30 weeks with my first baby. I’ve just been doing some research on epidurals - I’m not great with pain so looking into what pain relief is available. There seems to be some sort of ‘looking down’ on those who choose epidurals and I was just wondering why? What I’ve found makes it sounds pretty safe but comments from family members have all been ‘I did it just with gas and air’ like it’s some sort of achievement. I’m going to check in with midwife next time I see her to get her opinion but thought I’d throw it out there on here too.

OP posts:
Oldermum84 · 28/05/2023 11:58

Yes people like to find competition in everything, even giving birth. It's ridiculous. The epidural was great for me and I'll be asking for one asap for my second birth! Why should reducing your pain me looked down on... Absolute madness!

kwetu · 28/05/2023 12:03

I have 4 kids had no epidural but I really didn't know what I was missing, I was present at birth of first grandchild my daughter had an epidural, and the whole experience was such a vast contrast to what I had experienced, was beautiful and serene and my goodness if I had to do it all over I would 100% chose epidural!! But I guess everyone's experiences are different.

Seryse · 28/05/2023 12:05

As the poster above me said - it's muppets trying to turn it into a competition. I work in obstetrics and I can absolutely tell you there is NO shame in having an epidural, it's your birth, your choice, you do what YOU need to get through it. The amount of patients I've had to have a reassuring chat with because of all the social media pressure on "natural birth" (a term we no longer use btw) is awful and I hate that people are being made to feel that pressure when already, we're all feeling enough as it is.

Epidurals do come with risks, but anything medical does. Your midwife will be able to discuss these in depth with you as she will know what's avaliable in your area (mobile epidurals for example where you can still move around), more often than not the pros outweigh the cons.

scrantonelectriccity · 28/05/2023 12:09

I don't get it when women are smug about having no painkillers during labour, you don't get a medal and it doesn't make you any better!

I gave birth with only gas and air (not by choice, I really wanted an epidural!) and it was awful.

WandaWonder · 28/05/2023 12:11

I had an epidural and was very happy with it

threelionsonashirt · 28/05/2023 12:15

The pain sucks. I choose an epidural both times and I'd do it again. You do whatever it takes to get that baby out and if you need one have it.

callmesophia · 28/05/2023 12:18

I've had epidurals with some of my kids. Was brilliant, and loved the births because of it! It's nice because you just kinda feel the baby come down and your body takes over pushing it out... while you're chilling and smiling 😁

Seryse · 28/05/2023 12:30

One thing I will suggest, if you do want an epidural try and make the decision as early as you can in labour as the anesthetists can get really busy (might end up in theatre with an emergency for example and be delayed) and there's a point where its no longer an option to site one if you're in advanced labour. Unfortunately I've experienced this with a few patients when it's been left too late, most were alright with it in the end, but a few really didn't take the news well that it wasn't an option anymore due to circumstances outwith my control.

threelionsonashirt · 28/05/2023 12:35

I'd also recommend that your husband/partner/birthing partner is well aware of your wishes and is able to speak for you/instruct them regarding your wishes if things get too much/the pain gets too much for you.

Emmamoo89 · 28/05/2023 12:36

I had one and it was great. Them telling me when to push and when I was having contractions. 😁

Dinneronmybfpillow · 28/05/2023 12:38

I didn't have one because I hated being in the hospital environment and didn't want anything getting in the way of me getting home as soon as humanly possible. If you don't mind staying in after having your baby then I'd have one.

PointyMcguire · 28/05/2023 12:41

The best advice I had from a midwife during my induction was “there’s no prizes for going without pain relief”. I had an epidural and had a wonderful labour. Slept through the early part and then tapered down the dose before active labour so I could feel when to push. I wouldn’t hesitate to have another when the time comes.

pyjamalife · 28/05/2023 12:41

I had two epidurals. Lots of love for both my anaesthetists!

Who cares how others give birth, seriously couldn't care less if it's with or without drugs, c section or natural or assisted.

I do (slightly) judge (for lack of a better word) home births but only because I worry for the baby (and mother) in case of complications! Maybe not judge but have concern over.

threelionsonashirt · 28/05/2023 12:43

You wouldn't have a tooth out without pain relief? Why on Earth would you have a baby? 😂

Fridaysgirl17 · 28/05/2023 12:48

I had two inductions at 35 weeks (medically necessary) & had epidurals with both,I was unsure in my first & I'd had started the pitocin drip which I was trying to breathe through with just gas & air but my midwife spoke to me & as she said you don't need to be a hero if you need the epidural just ask so I did,it was a great birth as was my second & I was home 24 hours after birth with my second no extra time due to epidural. I for one was glad to have it & would recommend it 😊

outofmymindagain · 28/05/2023 12:49

I had one, and at the time, it definitely felt like the best decision I had EVER made l!

I got to the point where they told me that if I wanted it, it had to be then, and so I took it.

I regret not trying the gas and air and seeing how that would have played out, if I'm honest.

Phoebo · 28/05/2023 12:56

Well the problem is it'll numb you so you're likely to end up being on your back which is the worst position for giving birth, and then you're also more likely to need forceps or ventouse so more likely to tear. I'd try using gas and other methods initially, and then of you need an epidural in a smaller amount so you can feel something (not pain) and still push, rather being told when to push (which is so unnatural and not ideal). Also are you sure you've read the proper risks? I've had a few friends who had an epidural and were numb from neck down, not ideal when you've just had a baby also there is a risk of paralysis and other long term effects. It's not recommended for a reason, it should be an option if needed and not an active choice. I did alot of proper research (not random google searches).

crazeekat · 28/05/2023 13:11

get an epidural and ask for it as soon as possible incase u labour very quickly.
as for the competition, sod that.
none else is giving birth for you so they don't get a say in your birth plan.
this includes medical/midwifery staff who sometimes can put u off too.

H44123 · 28/05/2023 13:48

I had my first baby in feb and when I found out I was pregnant I said I wanted one.

I got to 5cms and it was very painful so no way I was getting to 10cm.

be mindful they will try persuade you you can do it on gas and air etc or they did to me. On the MAC they tried sending me to the birth centre but I refused as I knew no epidural there and I wanted the Labour ward. Kept trying to persuade me and I heard her on the phone saying she had tried but I wanted the Labour ward. Probably because they were full but they always have spare rooms

in all honesty it still kind of hurt but it was more pressure in my bum so you can still feel some sensation. Not to scare you I passed out after my epidural but I think because my blood pressure was up and down anyway but I would definitely have one again!

BertieBotts · 28/05/2023 16:46

With DS1 I had done a load of active birth classes and learned about the physiology of birth. Basically if you follow this theory, in order to support the birth process, you want to be upright at much as possible as every contraction causes baby's head to put pressure on your cervix, helping it to thin and open. That will still happen if you're lying down, but it's most effective if you're upright because you're not working against gravity. For example see this ping pong ball demo - you can see that obviously it would still be possible to do this sideways, but upright is likely to be a bit more effective.

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Then when the baby is moving through the birth canal, if you're focused on how to most effectively push the baby down, you ideally want to be upright again (or, at least, on all fours/squatting leaning back/leaning forward over something/lying on left side with something between knees) in order to have your hips the most open they can possibly be, including getting the lowest bit of your spine (tailbone/coxxyx) out of the way.

The theory is that if you can use your position + gravity + moving your hips a lot then you'll get a more open, easy position for the baby to come out and therefore (in theory) you have less chance of needing an instrumental birth, episiotomy, etc, and labour might also be quicker and less likely to tire you out so much that you can't push effectively at the end and need assistance (instrumental/episiotomy again).

Obviously the caveat of this is that labour takes a long time (many hours, sometimes several days) and really bloody hurts!! So while we can have all this knowledge and understand that physiologically, it is likely to make it easier and go more smoothly and efficiently (and not tire you/baby out as much) - there is also the option of pain relief, with the main three options being G&A, opiate injection, and epidural.

In the absence of pain relief, it's possible (in theory) to get through the experience by sort of hunkering down and "being mammal" and sort of going into yourself, the endorphins then do their job, and there's a kind of helpful positive feedback loop of relaxation encouraging more of the contraction-inducing hormones, and then those hormones helping you to relax more, IME it doesn't make it painless at all, but it helps you get over each contraction "hump" as they are only about 60 seconds long.

Gas and air is totally compatible with the active type of birth, but doesn't really do a great deal, it kind of takes the edge off which might be enough. I found it helpful. But I wouldn't say that it really takes the pain away - it helped me feel like I was in control of something when I was starting to lose it, and gave me the push to get through the last bit which is extra tough.

Opiate injections are usually given if you're a while off actually giving birth but you're getting tired and frustrated, because they can let you rest and relax for a bit. It's temporary and they don't like to give this too close to birth because it can make the baby sleepy.

Epidural is basically the gold standard though, I'm told it totally numbs the pain but the issue is that it also immobilises you (so you can't do the active positioning stuff) and means that you need monitoring, which can be slightly stressful. Because you don't need the coping mechanisms to get through the contractions any more, I guess that the feedback loop isn't happening, although that doesn't mean you won't get the contraction-producing hormones, you still do - I think it's just that the whole thing is meant to work slightly less efficiently.

There are now "mobile" epidurals as people have mentioned which might mean you can still do the active bit, but they don't seem to be an option everywhere and I don't think I was ever offered one.

So in theory at least, it's meant to be a trade off between a painful/intense experience that is likely to be more straightforward and result in an easier recovery, vs an experience which is pain free but might work less effectively and might be more likely to result in longer labour which could mean more distress to baby or instrumental delivery which would be a more difficult recovery.

And, obviously also, it's not always as simple as that, because there are many things which can happen which makes the drug-free option less copable, or more painful, or not effective anyway. Babies can be awkwardly positioned, they can get stuck, they can be big, the environment might not be conducive to relaxation, you might have necessary interventions such as induction or there might be no conceivable reason, it's just different! There are no guarantees, so you could go all natural and have instrumental delivery anyway, or you could have an epidural and have a perfectly straightforward labour.

All other things being equal, it would make sense if it was just seen as a personal choice that people make with all their own personal factors e.g. pain tolerance, length/experience of previous labours, likelihood of complications, and it seems just as valid to me for one person to say "It doesn't make that much difference, I'd rather have the pain relief" vs "I'd like to see if I can optimise the process/have as hands-off an experience as possible". It also seems, because I quickly googled to see if there were stats about labour length, intervenstions etc related to epidural or not, that some of the info I've explained here is out of date and it's actually been found that epidural doesn't increase incidence of these things, so that might be worth investigating. I'll leave it in just because this was the basis that I made decisions on and it seemed to make sense to me.

Unfortunately there DOES seem to be a vocal minority who seem to see drug-free birth as some kind of pinnacle to aim for, for everyone when that doesn't really make sense. They often see intervention-free as some kind of goal as well which is even stupider because the majority of the time, you don't have any control over whether an intervention is needed, and when they are needed, you absolutely want them!! I do agree that policies/healthcare professionals should be trying to minimise use of intervention except when necessary, but it seems daft to try and paint this kind of thing as maternal choice, and even more daft to insist that there is a "right" vs "wrong" choice.

Ultimately, there are pros and cons to both options. For me, I opted for an epidural with DS2 when I remembered what it was really like after 10 years, and realised I didn't actually want to go through hours more pain if I didn't have to. However, it didn't work, and I ended up feeling more out of control and finding it more difficult. I opted for no epidural with DS3, because I just didn't want that to happen again, I honestly felt a bit daunted at the idea of being immobilised, the procedure to get the epidural in wasn't nice, and I was OK managing with coping techniques all the way through. But if the labour had been different, then it might have led to a different choice. He was actually breech up until 37 weeks and I had a c-section booked because I had no desire to do the breech birth vaginally, but he turned in the end.

Labour is hard however you do it and everyone who has been through it is strong IMO no matter how it went. I think the most empowering thing is understanding how all these tools - pain relief options, medical interventions, management techniques, environmental tweaks etc - can feed in and being able to feed into, or at the very least understand decisions about them when there's time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?ab_channel=LizChalmers&v=URyEZusnjBI

BertieBotts · 28/05/2023 16:46

The video messed up but the link at the bottom works if you wanted to watch it.

Thisisabsolutelyfine · 28/05/2023 16:51

As PP have said, because some women think it’s a badge of honour to go without pain relief and that’s frankly ridiculous. Epidural made my births lovely calm
relaxed experiences, and cannot recommend enough.

BertieBotts · 28/05/2023 17:06

God well I wrote war and peace as usual Hmm

The problem is that the shorter posts are very polarised because it's just not that simple.

TL;DR:

Epidural carries some risks and therefore, you should evaluate whether you're OK with those risks before you choose one.

No-epidural birth also has a pretty high certainty of being very painful. You should evaluate whether you're OK with that before you choose one.

What's right for one person might not be right for another person. It doesn't make sense for anybody to proclaim a one size fits all solution.

What does help IMO is learning about the different interventions which might be suggested and why they might be used and when they are helpful and what the risks are.

Birth, like anything, is about balancing the risks and benefits, which will always be individual.

Cdoc · 28/05/2023 17:12

My hospital offered a mobile epidural and I had it after 4 hours of intense labour (90 second contractions with only 15 second gaps following induction). Best decision I made and I would do it again in a heartbeat. I could still feel when I needed to push and could still feel my legs throughout. I was able to walk to the bathroom myself within a few hours of labour. It also meant I was numb for the stitching of the several tears I had which was an absolute win! They do carry risks, of course, however they also can make the experience far more bearable. Gas and air in my experience made me feel very sick and so I couldn’t use it.

I was also given the advice that there are no prizes at the end for not taking pain relief, but it’s absolutely about what works best for you.

SparkyBlue · 28/05/2023 17:15

Labour and birth is different for everyone. The only advice I'll give you OP is to go with what works for YOU. My friend had a baby seven months after me and didn't even know she was in labour she just felt a bit off in herself (she was expecting it to be way more painful)and literally her baby appeared 10 minutes after she arrived into hospital. I ended up having to stay in hospital for ages due to pre eclampsia. So you can't compare. There is no best way to give birth.