Overweight and first positive test, I'm worried

[JnJ929]

Hi all
I'm new here, I only joined yesterday after I took a clear blue test and it came back positive..

For some background I'm 28, DP is 29, we've been together 11 months, lived together for 9 months (we've known eachother since we were 16&17), we live together with my mum who has stage 4 cancer, that is currently being managed and she's living life as normal.

I have never taken a pregnancy test before/Never been pregnant before becuase I'm usually extremely careful.( I have had 2 relationships & sexual partnets prior to my current one, same for DP)

I am 5ft 8, and currently Overweight, my BMI puts me in the obese category.

DP and I have talked about kids, he is fully on board (Though I have not yet told him about the positive test)

I wasn't majorly shocked at the positive result, hell that pregnant line was already coming up within the 10 seconds of me putting the cap back on the test, wiping, and flushing the loo.
We've been using condoms 99% of the time, or pull out if not using a condom I came off birth control (mini pill) typically about 6 months before we got together, because it was causing skin problems, massive mood swings, horrible cramps, irregular periods etc, I have also tried implant before and that was worse.

We haven't been actively 'trying' for a baby but both agreed if it happens it happens, we're both in full time work earning enough to live on and have savings and pay off credit cards (baring in mind we both live with my mum still)
When I waited the full 3 minutes, that test was definetly still positive. Most due date calculators say I'm around 4 weeks pregnant, but I've ordered the clearblue test that tells you how many weeks, which will be arriving today. I also plan to call GP today to get an appointment.

I wasn't able to sleep properly much last night, and now its 6.30am as I write this because I've just been having some concerns and worries about what to do now.

I'd like to go ahead withe pregnancy but I'm aware being overweight carries a number of risks and I worry if it's 'worth' me going ahead with the pregnancy when there's so many things that could go wrong.

I spent yesterday doing some research on being Overweight and pregnant, and a lot of info is really worrying and starting to stress me out, making me wonder if I should get an appointment to get the abortion pill, but in the same breath I know people larger than me who've had multiple babies with no issues, and that the appointments always check on you and baby to make sure everything's running smoothly.

Aside from being overweight, I currently have no major issues due to my weight (as far as im aware) e.g. no diabetes, no heart problems as far as I'm aware (I can do 3 hour walks without feeling like I'm on deaths door) I have slightly above average blood pressure but I guess that is to be expected with my weight.

Typically about 2 weeks ago I'd just started a whole new healthy lifestyle regime, tracking what I eat, getting my 5 a day, doing a minimum of 30 mins walk a day, drinking 2L+ water, reading at night, getting 7+hrs sleep, came off social media etc
Then Tuesday I realise my period is about 2 days late (its usually pretty dead on 28 days) and what made me test was due to this, and the fact I'd been irrationally angry/irritable the past few days, sore breasts, and hot flushes.

I want children, DP wants children, I'd like to go ahead with this pregnancy but I can be quite an over worrier.. like part of me thinks if I go ahead with this, knowing my luck I'll miscarry or the baby will be premature, or something else will go wrong.
Another part of me is like, if I take the abortion pill I'll defintely feel guilty and ill begin to worry if it'll then cause further issues in my next pregnancy.

I guess what I really want to know is, should I be as worried about all these complications/problems that can come up with being overweight and pregnant?
(If course I know being Overweight isn't healthy, that's why I started this new healthy lifestyle thing) or should I go with the flow, get my appointments and trust that at these appointments they'll help me though any potential issues that come up?

Many thanks in advance!

Stop googling! Congratulations on your pregnancy and good luck x

if you are happy to be pregnant and the only thing causing you have these thoughts is your weight. I would say go through with the appointments and try to continue with the healthy lifestyle whilst pregnant.
I was very overweight and carried identical twins, so was petrified with reading about all the general risks and then being told that with I.D twins that almost tripled my risks.

in the end I ended up losing 3 stone due to morning sickness by the end of pregnancy, never had gestational diabetes, blood pressure remained healthy and I had a healthy and successful birth.

I do think pregnancy risk and weight have links it definitely depends on the individual, I have friends with healthy bmi’s that ended up with preeclampsia and gestational diabetes.

Increased likelihood doesn’t mean certainty. The majority of overweight/obese women will have uncomplicated pregnancies.

Keep up with your healthy lifestyle, start taking a high dose of folic acid (5mg) and vitamin D, and enjoy your pregnancy.

Im overweight and have been for 2/3 of my pregnancies- my last caused gestational diabetes- however it was easily controlled by diet then insulin and I actually lost weight (baby perfectly healthy and normal range for all things) as i was eating much better than usual

Me being overweight has had no impact on my pregnancy. I eat as well as I can and have only gained a kilo so far at almost 34 weeks pregnant. I lost weight during my first pregnancy too.
It's the change in eating habits, I became more careful for baby

You need to ring GP surgery today and ask for a high dosage of folic acid because your pregnant and your BMI is xyz. You can only get this on prescription so you need to ring today and ask for it.

Get yourself booked in at the midwife.
as you’re overweight they may schedule in a few more checks.
My trust put me on aspirin due to my weight up till 36 weeks.
stay away from google and the clear blue tests!

tell your partner so you have some support 🙂

Have you looked around you? Nearly everyone is overweight or obese. You'll be fine. Eat carefully do you don't gain unnecessary extra weight on top of your pregnancy weight. Congratulations

Congratulations! Pregnancy is a great time to kick start some healthy habits. Sometimes it's hard to do it for yourself but much easier to do it for your baby. If you eat healthily from now on it will help your weight and nourish your baby. And don't forget you can absolutely exercise when you are pregnant too.

Congratulations! And for an excellent and supportive resource, check out The Heavyweight Midwife (Google can lead you there).

I was majorly overweight for my second pregnancy and was so worried about it was a healthy pregnancy in the end.I was put on aspirin and just treated as high risk.
I didnt have gestational diabetes which i was convinced id have, i was at risk for preeclampsia but that was because of other factors.

The only issue i had was as i got heavier towards the end it was hard with the already extra weight. But then both my pregnancies i really struggled towards the end so not sure if thats me disliking being pregnant or just is normal

I've got this (totally unscientific) theory that you wouldn't get pregnant if your body wasn't ready.

I was quite underweight before I had dd and it took ages to conceive, nearly 2y. I ate as well as I could and as soon as I gained a couple of bmi points, I finally conceived.

You've recently been on a health kick, I reckon your body has decided you're ready! Congratulations and good luck

I'm in the obese category too and currently 29 weeks pregnant. Everyone I've seen during the pregnancy has been great and have had no major concerns.

I was tested for gestational diabetes at 27 weeks due to high bmi (plenty of other factors lead to testing too), which came back positive but has so far been managed through diet and extra growth scans etc!

There's no reason why you won't have a happy healthy pregnancy due to your weight alone 🥰 Congratulations!! x

Hi I was classed as obese with both of my pregnancies. Both were perfect and no complications.
Congratulations on your pregnancy, try and enjoy this happy time! Stress will do you more harm than any of those scaremongering statistics x

Congratulations! Concentrate on nourishing your body/baby rather than focusing solely on your weight - so adding lots of vegetables to ‘crowd out’ the more unhealthy food in any meal. Up the fish, vegetables, healthy fats in eggs and avocados to build your child’s brain.

Congratulations! (I think? Read the congratulations messages again in a few days if you need that time to work through some of negative feeling you’re having first).
The clear blue tests with an indicator for weeks give an estimation of how long it has been since conception, which is usually 2 weeks less than traditional weeks calculations based off your last period. They are also not that accurate. So if it’s been 4 weeks since your last period, 4 weeks pregnant is most likely the correct estimation. - occasionally women have implantation bleeding that they mistake for a period and so they believe they are 4 weeks pregnant when actually they are 7-8 weeks pregnant. But that’s not particularly likely and the clear blue test won’t be able to tell you that either.
Being overweight or obese makes certain pregnancy issues more likely, but that doesn’t mean that every overweight or obese pregnant woman has issues or that all pregnancy to women with a healthy BMI will go smoothly.
There are things you can do to help your pregnancy go well. Taking a higher dose of Folic acid + maybe a prenatal vitamin supplement is one thing. Continuing/starting a healthy sustainable level of exercise is another - don’t start training for a marathon but do add a daily walk/swim or whatever you might enjoy. I’d pick something low impact if it’s a new addition because pregnancy hormones make everything a bit lax and you don’t want to injure yourself. Since you are in the obese BMI category, you can absolutely aim to limit weight gain. Every pregnancy involves maybe 7-10kg of weight gain that is directly related to growing the baby - the baby itself, the placenta, amniotic fluid, increased blood volume, increased breast tissue. It’s usual and healthy for women with a low or low end healthy BMI to gain some bodyfat too. Sometimes drs and midwives will recommend an overweight or obese pregnant woman should aim for negligible weight gain during pregnancy - this actually means a body fat of loss of around 7-10kg over the course of pregnancy since she will still be gaining the weight of the baby + placenta etc. So slow steady weight loss while pregnant basically. This might be an option for you.

I was 18 stone, 19 stone and 21 stone with my 3 children and I had 0 complications, my latest midwife kept saying 'you were this heavy with your other babies!?'
Just relax, stress is much worse in pregnancy than weight.
Good luck xx

Hi JnJ929! Congratulations! A bit of a surprise!
I'm a specialist plus size midwife (my business is mentioned here om the comments) and I'm so happy you've had all this fabulous advice on here! I have a free guide to plus size pregnancy care if you'd like me to send you a copy?
The bottom line is that being plus size in pregnancy is a consideration, not a complication. The most likely journey (statistically) is that you'll have a complication free pregnancy and birth and a healthy baby. Drop me a msg if you'd like my guide x