Old, fat and worrying

[joannem87]

Hi all,

I’m 35 and 10 weeks pregnant with my 2nd child. First child now being 13 years old. I am overweight with a bmi of I think about 37 or 38. I have my first midwives appointment tomorrow and I feel so sick and nervous that I am going to be lectured about my weight and it will add to the risks I’ve already got with being older. I know it’s not ideal being this overweight and pregnant but it’s happened now. Anyone been through the same worries with weight and age? I am constantly worrying about abnormalities and syndromes and just can’t bring myself
to get excited due to the constant worries.

I am 36 and 11 weeks pregnant with DD. I mentioned to the midwife I was worried about my age and she said that I was young yet and no reason to worry about this. Also there are many many others in these forum's over 35. Not sure if that makes you feel any better x

Sorry ment DC2 I don't know if it will be a DD or DS yet lol x

Please don’t worry.
are you taking 5mg Folic acid?

I have a BMI of 32 and i am 37 years old, so classed as old and obese as well. I am 10 weeks woth my second and deffo feel guilty for being overweight. Midwife didnt say anything just gave me higher dose of folic acid and vit D to take as being fat can affect that.
Maybe ask what support you can have and any additional tests to make sure the pregnancy is healthy.

It says not to diet, but try to eat a well balanced diet

I think what you have to remember is although being overweight will come with some raised risks, that will be across the population - for you as an individual the increased risk is likely to be small. (Same as if you are 35 and significantly overweight you are at more risk from serious Covid than someone who is 30 and average weight.. but the risk is still very small.)

If it will reduce your anxiety just plan to preempt it by saying that you are feeling very anxious due to your age (although you really aren’t old) and your weight - you are trying to be as healthy as possible so you’d like any realistic advice.

I am 38 and have a BMI of about 32 and also feel worried about my weight but more because I'm only 7 weeks pregnant and concerned what I'll be like in another 30 weeks 🫣 I am trying to eat better and keep moving - walks and short runs which I was doing before I found out anyway... it is frustrating because I had always wanted to get my weight down before getting pregnant again but here I am and I am delighted to be pregnant again 😁

Hey @joannem87 first of all congratulations on your pregnancy. I understand completely how you feel. This is my 3rd baby and I had my last nearly 10 years ago when I was obviously much younger and a healthy weight. With this baby I was 36 (37 now ) when I had my first midwife booking appointment at 11 weeks and I was terrified- I also had a bmi of 36. My midwife has been lovely and put me at complete ease . Said they are not concerned about age until you reach 40 and bmi wasn’t really brought up except that I would have to have a glucose tolerance test - which I thankfully passed and don’t have gestational diabetes. My combined screening results were all low risk too , blood tests and scans have all been normal and been a low risk pregnancy except I’ve suffered with HG throughout as well as bad pelvic pain . I wasn’t given a higher dosage of vitamins, actually with the HG and with my massive bump im actually a lower weight than I was at my booking appointment. No diet has such just a combination of HG, food aversions and eating more healthy ( still have treats ) Im now almost 37 weeks. I know everyone is different but as I said I know how you feel so I just wanted to offer you a bit of comfort and reassurance. Wishing you all the best for the coming months ahead . X

Thank you for all the replies. Had my appointment and it was fine, midwives were lovely. I will be consultant led and have additional scans because of my bmi but I do feel more relaxed. We also had a private scan this morning and baby was jumping about :)

I'm almost 40 and BMI was 34 on booking in. Baby #1 for me.
Midwife (& anyone else I have spoken to in the medical field) has told me to stop being silly when I said I was old and fat, and said my pregnancy is still considered low risk (although I do have to have the GD test).

Is 35 classed as old 😳?

Just to say I didn't meet a single mum at baby groups that was younger than 37 when I had my son a few years ago.

Lots of women have higher BMIs I don't think you will be lectured

You're hardly old OP.
I'm 44 and I'm definitely not old.