Pregnant after a miscarriage.

[hannah345]

Hey. Some of you might of seen my post in February about my miscarriage... if not. I had a miscarriage around 7 weeks at the end of Feb, had a normal period in March and I tested last week, and it was positive. Today is the day I'm meant to be due on my period so I took another test, and it's positive.

My boobs have been sooooo sore and swollen for about 2 weeks so I just knew I was.

But, this pregnancy is different. My minds not wondering to baby names, or anything baby related... I keep forgetting I'm pregnant if im honestly. Im trying not to get attached just incase I lose this one too. Any words of advice?

Hi, congrats OP. Fingers crossed this is your time. No words but to say I was in your situation and I dont think I ever felt 'relaxed' throughout the whole pregnancy, but it all worked out great and I have a snoring 2 and a half year old sat next to me right now x

@kjv1234 aww! Thank you lovely!

@hannah345 hey I know exactly how you are feeling, I had a miscarriage in jan and currently 4+6. Every day is checking for blood when I go to the loo, and even last night I was woken by cramps but after some paracetamol and lying on my side they went so hoping that’s good news to how I was before! Good luck with your pregnancy, I think just try and stay positive, unless you bleed and are in a lot of pain then all good signs 🙏

I 100% know what you mean. I have had a stillbirth back in 2021, miscarriage in Nov 2022 and March 2023 and currently 5 weeks pregnant. I think the early stages are so nerve wrecking because there is no movement and you don't have much of a clue what's going on in there. I am being very cautiously hopeful and like you, keep forgetting I am pregnant. I am going to try and get a scan at 7 weeks to hopefully reassure me and help me bond?? But I totally getcha. You don't want to get your hopes up but then I sometimes think, if I were to lose this little baby i will be as heartbroken even without getting my hopes up so I may as well embrace the possibility of this little baba xx

I think it's normal. I've had a few miscarriage including one very late one. Im currently pregnant and basically not acknowledging it in real life until I get to 24 weeks. Like obviously I'll go to my midwife appointments etc but I'm not telling anyone, not thinking of names, buying clothes etc.

Realistically I don't know why, coz I'll still be gutted if I miscarry again but it just feels like a bit of self-preservation.

Forgot to add losing a baby really does steal your enjoyment of pregnancy and that sort of naïve feeling that everything will probably be fine. It's very cruel.

I know the general advice is to try and enjoy your pregnancy but I find that too hard. I did Google some mantras to repeat to myself instead of going to the toilet for the 100th time check whether or not I'm bleeding. There's loads online if you care to look but I just went with 'everything is ok right now'

Same boat - I’m now 7 weeks but from 4-6 I was a bit detached from it. Now that I feel like shit, I believe it a bit more and it’s more real.

good luck with it op

I had a miscarriage last April, it was my first pregnancy. Then I conceived again in August. I spent the first 20 weeks being pessimistic and trying not to get attached incase it didn’t work out again. I now have a 4 week old baby. Hope it all goes well, just adding this incase you would like positive stories after a miscarriage.

Thank you all for your advice and kind words, hope you're all okay and good luck to each of you xxx

I'm in exactly the same position, MMC at 8 weeks at the beginning of March and I found out yesterday I am pregnant again. My period isn't due until Sunday but I ovulated early so have a nice strong line etc but finding it so hard to believe that it might be ok this time. I saw some advice online that said to just tell yourself each day 'I'm pregnant today' and allow yourself to feel happy about that without thinking beyond that point

I downloaded a wee countdown mindful colouring sheet so each week get to colour a bit in... bought a Cross stich baby sampler to do... definitely have an inner little old lady but things like this really help "ground" me. I oddly find looking at wee baby grows and maybe buying 1 small things helps me try and focus on the day that there'll be a pink wrinkly baby using the item.... the biggest thing is knowing I'm not alone and sadly there are all you other women in the same boat xx

Thanks girls, I've just got back from tescos and honestly... my anxiety is through the roof! Walking around tescos with dull, period pains. And that's what happened the last time and ended up with a MC so I'm keeping my fingers crossed!!!!

I completely understand how you are feeling. MMC in Dec 2021 and then 15months of trying/despairing! Currently 7wks and still not allowing myself to believe it, despite seeing a heartbeat at an early scan last week. The only thing that has helped me is to keep reminding myself that statistically it is more likely to go well than go wrong. 1 previous miscarriage does not lead to an increased likelihood of a second
loss - it is only after a second miscarriage that the stats start to change, but even then it isn’t as much as you might think!

@BBuzzyBusyBee thank you! Really needed that x

It's an anxious time.

Currently 10 weeks following a MMC at 14 weeks in August 2022.

Someone on here told me....

Today you are pregnant. Don't let tomorrow's sorrow rob you of today's joy.

@BBeautifulBirds

Love that quote! X

Same boat here OP.

My first pregnancy was so joyful and I was excited rather than anxious. I just expected all would go well and I'd have a baby at the end. I was lucky, and that happened!

My 2nd pregnancy was a MMC and it broke me a little. I then struggled to fall pregnant. After 16 months of desperately trying, I got that positive. I was so shocked to find that instead of happiness I just felt worried and scared.

Pregnancy after loss is really challenging. Try to take it one day at a time.

I had a scan at 7 weeks and 10 weeks (due to spotting) and I've just had my 12 weeks scan. I feel better and more relaxed but there's definitely still anxiety there.

Wishing you all the best.

@hannah345 No advice unfortunately, but tonnes of empathy. I had a miscarriage at 6 weeks on 31st March. As soon as I stopped bleeding I started tracking ovulation but didn't hold out much hope. I just had a positive test though this morning and can't believe it. However, I feel the same as you. I've spent all evening searching miscarriage statistics and looking for positive stories about pregnancies after miscarriages. I had a chemical pregnancy too at Christmas, so it's all knocked me a bit.

Congratulations though and fingers crossed for a happy and healthy pregnancy for you!