Hi, not sure if this is the right place in particular to post this and I’m very new to this forum so forgive me if I’m wrong.
i thought I’d share my own experience of my pregnancy + medical abortion, I’m still fairly drowsy from the codeine so hope this is all coherent, but did want to share this for anyone who might be around 8/9 weeks and are planning to have a termination themselves. I know there’s a lot of different experiences with medical abortions on here but I guess I also wanted to see if anyone could relate as well. I can’t say mine was as painless as some experiences but I definitely don’t regret it, and the relief from some of my symptoms already has been a huge mood booster regardless of the pain. I hope people are understanding of my reasoning for a termination, as much as I do feel sad I did this, I know it was the best thing for me long term.
I found out I was pregnant right at the end of march and would of been around 5 weeks 5 days in accordance with my last period. The weeks leading up to my positive test I knew something was up, I go to the gym to lift 5 times a week and did not feel any weaker when my period was supposed to arrive, and I’m not sure if anyone relates but I could always tell where I was in my menstrual cycle by the way I felt at the gym. The lead up to my period would make me struggle a lot more with lifting as much as I normally would i.e in ovulation, however shortly after picking up on this I was exhausted a lot. Very exhausted; nauseous; rundown and a lot of other smaller symptoms that I knew could be associated with early pregnancy. The gym suddenly felt a lot tougher, my endurance changed and the bold positive on my test was not a surprise.
once I picked up on my symptoms, everything felt a lot harder. The nausea begun shortly after this and became a constant; I could no longer eat and was throwing up mostly everyday especially when travelling and at night. This was hard as I had spent months trying to gain weight through the gym, and to lose that was heartbreaking. I found it tough to eat any food, everything seemed off putting to me and there was not a single food I enjoyed throughout. My reasoning for the termination was being a uni law student, I’m not financially stable, I was currently going through a breakup (who had gotten me pregnant) and I’m struggling a lot with anxiety that has worsened over the last year. It didn’t feel right to put myself through that nor a baby but I do respect anyone who has been able to endure pregnancy; it’s so much harder than I would have imagined in that short time I did experience it.
I knew what I wanted to do, booked a consultation through BPAS etc. but was too sick to get my tablets multiple times. I only managed to do this Monday and that was a struggle itself with travelling on the train. I am currently home from uni for the Easter, and it was hard keeping this from my parents; I’m 21, but my parents would not be very understanding, they’re great in a lot of aspects but my mum struggled to conceive and being an IVF baby, I have heard her make subtle comments about being against abortion in the past. Overall they wouldn’t be very supportive, so I endured the pregnancy alone which was mentally very challenging; I found it isolating and just couldn’t enjoy a lot.
I took the first pill, mifepristone, yesterday as soon as I could; I felt nauseous from it for the majority of the day, experienced tension headaches, slight cramping and my appetite was still fairly off. I did not throw up. It was what I expected.
When I woke up, I decided that I’d finish the rest of the termination rather than wait 48 hours just because I really wanted it over and done with. I was still not eating and lost 4kg very fast, so I wanted to try get back into routine as soon as I could. i inserted the next medication vaginally at around 10:30am, experiencing some cramping for the first 45 minutes that could of been from the medication yesterday; I wasn’t too sure. I was given codeine but because of how nauseous I was, and a sudden inability to swallow tablets that would result in me throwing up, I did not take it at first. Around an hour or so in, I started to feel more heavy cramps so I ended up going to the toilet. The pain was quite bad, progressing to a lot worse than what I would consider bad period cramps. I ended up throwing up from the pain, which was just a lot of bile, and experienced diarrhoea shortly after. I knew these were possible symptoms but I came to the conclusion that this wouldn’t be as easy to endure as I thought and I knew I needed the codeine.
i would say the pain got very very bad after this, I’ve never experienced such intense cramping and it was hard to not scream or cry; going through this by myself, I felt miserable and in total agony. It was honestly one of the worst pains I’ve experienced, and felt never ending. I attempted two codeine tablets and shortly threw them up from the pain. I attempted another two half an hour after when the pain was staying at a constant, and did manage to keep these down. I do recommend taking any painkillers before you do insert the tablets, I know that was my mistake. I did feel the effects of the codeine slightly by then, tried to get some dry toast down and have some water. I ended up throwing that up, and found the vomiting painful. Unfortunately the codeine did make me drowsy and tired, but only minimised they pain slightly. I still found the pain intense, but it became more manageable. I had a hot water bottle that didn’t do much but was a source of comfort for me anyway. I took two more codeine tablets sometime later, I can’t remember when. Time went very slow, and I ended up inserting my second lot of tablets. By this point I started to experience some bleeding, this was not necessarily heavy, but I would say similar to a medium flow period. Having inserted the tablets, I found the pain so bad even with the codeine and threw up once more. The pain was very much ongoing, and I took one more codeine tablet in an attempt to see if I could sleep. I went to the toilet around 3/4pm and passed some very large blood clots, this was when the bleeding was heaviest. Time was very weird as I said, so I don’t remember exactly everything but I remember the pain only getting easier at around 6/7pm, currently I have minor cramps and nausea is gone. I even managed to eat some food and it was a huge relief to be able to enjoy food again. I managed to sleep a bit even with the pain, and although my experience wasn’t as painless as I hoped, I definitely have no regrets. As much as this was hard to endure, and I’ve only just gone through it, I hope anyone who chooses to have a termination (for whatever reason) knows that the pain can be intense but definitely worth it. I’m happy that my symptoms are gone. I can’t say how I will feel tomorrow and what bleeding will be like for the next week or two, but it was a huge relief to get through this and to know that I will be able to have nausea free days now. Sorry this is very long winded, if anyone can relate or have their own experiences I would be interested on how they felt after.