How do you feel about hospital visitors?

[LunaBoBuna]

I'm due to give to have my baby girl on Thursday via ELCS.

I had my pre-op consult last week and they let me know their visitors policy is that birthing partner is welcome the whole time (day/night) and then you are able to have 1 bedside visitor between 4-6pm, siblings are allowed in during that 2hr period too. However I have told family that my eldest child counts as that 1 bedside visitor, so they're going to have to wait til I'm home to visit.
Obviously family members are complaining that it's still COVID style policy but frankly, I'm relieved, with my first my in-laws were at my bedside visiting before I'd even been moved from the post-op recovery room!

The nurses on the maternity ward have said that this is their new post-covid policy and is likely to stay as they've had an overwhelming response from the birthing mothers that it's actually been so nice that they don't have to entertain visitors and can focus on bonding with their baby and actually getting over birth.

Am I the only one that's quite relieved that this looks like it's the new policy going forward? How do you all feel about visitors?

I only had my husband visit when I had my baby, and I was so glad. I looked and felt like crap and would have hated having anyone else around, even my own mum!

I certainly feel it would be more restful; I had everyone (6 visitors) in the day after my planned c section and DH and in retrospect the day would have been better spent just bonding with my baby and DH. It also would be more restful even once your own visitors have gone as everyone else having people in and out makes it feel busy and noisy too

It's each to their own, there will be some who will love having visitors but personally I only want my partner to be at hospital and possibly our other children. Any other visitors can wait til we come home.

Good luck for Thursday and if anyone complains again just say look it's beyond my control, the hospital have a policy for a reason and I'm not going to kick up a fuss about it as it won't change a thing.

Oh, I didn’t have visitors because I was out within 20 hours after my elective section.

There wasn’t time because I had the baby, had a shower, baby latched into feed, packed up my bits and pieces (only took a very teeny bag) and was home.

Not much point in people trailing up to the hospital when they could come in a day or so when we were home.

The other good thing about not having visitors is that the ward won't be full of everyone else's visitors all day.

I think time with no visitors or partners on the ward is preferable personally. Mum and baby getting to know each other.

I had a baby 6 weeks ago and my local hospital doesn’t let visitors at all! I was allowed my husband as he was my birth partner, but no-one else, not even my mum who was also there for the birth. She was allowed while I was in the delivery suite and had to leave when I went to the ward. I would’ve liked my mum to be able to visit too, as it would’ve meant when my husband had to go home and go to work I could’ve had some other company, but I agree with the comment above that it was nice that everyone else’s visitors weren’t taking up lots of room on a very cramped and busy ward

I had DS during COVID and I’m pregnant with DC2. This post COVID visitor policy sounds too much if you ask me, I really hope there are no visitors when I’m in. Even just having the dads in during COVID was awful, I complained about it at the time. I was walking around with a catheter bag from between my legs, surely they can’t expect vulnerable women to be put in this position? I can’t imagine how awful it must have been for women pre pandemic. I have an appointment this week so will check.

I was so excited both times round to see people - DC1 was an EMCS in the evening so my parents then my in laws came the next day. DC2 was an ELCS and my parents came within 5 hours of their birth, and my in laws a couple of hours later. I'd have had more but was out by lunchtime the next day!

Go by how you feel - you might want the privacy, you might want to see people.

I was only allowed my husband when I had my elcs last August, but I personally would have loved if my mum could have visited

I think the restrictions are much better.

If a woman has had an easy birth, she's going home fairly quickly, so there's no need to visit in the maternity unit.

But having had a 40 hour labour followed by ventouse, absolutely the last thing I needed was crowds of visitors, either for me or for the ladies in the beds on either side.

I can see plus and negative sides.

If they're not allowed to visit in hospital they're likely to be hounding you as soon as you're home and massively overstay their welcome. Should you tell them you're only allowed one visitor at a time and tell them only the last half hour ... well they can't exactly stay long before being evicted by the midwives and then you can tell them they've already seen them so they don't need to come round when you're home!

You need to tell your DH to say (if he hasn't got the nous to work it out for himself) " Luna's exhausted, wait until we're home please"

I loved hospital visitors. They brought their own tea and coffee and I could get up and have a hobble round while they cuddled baby. Much better than having to deal
With them at home

Our local hospital is 2 named people only and I'm hoping they don't change it as don't want the circus 🎪 rolling in

Gosh I'm so glad I'm not the only one feeling this way! I genuinely thought I was being a bit selfish lol

It's my second child and my first was 5 years ago, so pre-covid visitor free for all!
I had an ELCS at 10am and had the in-laws there maximum 2 hours later, I definitely regret not telling them to wait please.
This time round I genuinely only want my husband there and for my DS to come see his new sister.

Our hospital was one of the few in COVID that actually allowed birthing partners, they were never banned entirely, so it's nice that they've only slightly changed it to include 1 visitor for a very restricted amount of time.

I definitely feel like it's different between first/second babies and the amount of support you feel you'll need around you

I had two sections long before covid and other than my husband only my father came to visit. People were well aware that it was not good to visit someone who's had an operation and may still have a catheter and not be mobile and be in some pain, let alone up for visitors.
When I arrived home we welcomed visitors every day - that was fine.

I'm glad you're happy but I think this is really personal. I wasn't able to come home until day 4 and I'd honestly have felt gutted if my DP and DPIL hadn't been able to meet DD until we were discharged. Having said that, they were kind and respectful and didn't hang around for hours making lots of noise. I think it's a really difficult balance for everyone.

When my first was born (pre covid) I said no visitors to hospital (except DH) and no visitors until we had been home for 3 days. ILs couldn't respect the 3 day thing, were on the phone moaning, held a grudge about it for years that they brought up recently.

We are having a baby this year. First visitor will be DD and if anyone else even attempts to come they will be told to leave. I'd like to have other visitors at the hospital because it means they wont want to hang around and are more likely to leave us be when we are home. ILs that is, my family can happily wait a few days when asked. I don't know what the policy is now.

Nobody needs to come and visit you in hospital after you've had a baby. If you're well enough to receive visitors, you're well enough to go home IMO.

This has just prompted me to Google the hospitals policy for us now...1 person 9 - 8pm and 2 people 3 - 8pm plus any other children the woman has. A generous policy. 3 - 8pm will be noisy.

If you're well enough to receive visitors, you're well enough to go home IMO.

Ridiculous. If somebody has had a c section or assisted birth, or even just a long labour, and their partner wants to come and meet their child, you are saying they shouldn't?

It also takes hours to be discharged. I asked to be discharged at 11am with DD and wasn't discharged until 4pm. The only reason I was in overnight was because she was born in the evening and by the time I had my stitches, it was 10pm.

I discharged myself at 11am once DS had his well baby checks (30 hours post section, delivered 2am on Sunday went home Monday). I went home to DH, my mum and my dad to help with DS vs a clueless DH in hospital during the day and what I still call the worst night of my life even with my aunty being a midwife popping in to help on night one.

Honestly I would have loved DH to stay over night and visitors during the day to help vs privacy. I work in the hospital I delivered in and even had friends from work pop up to see DS it was lovely.

I don't count the partner as a visitor. I mean grandparents, siblings etc.

As in the mum/dad's siblings, e.g. baby's aunts/uncles, not the baby's siblings.

I was on for 5 days after my first. I was so bored that the highlight one day was the visit from DHs Regimental chaplain.

Just one day or so, I can see rest bring more beneficial.