Give me your advice re ECV or opting for planned C/S

[BananaHam]

I'm so conflicted trying to decide what to do. FTM 34w at the moment, anterior placenta, baby still breech. Baby refusing to turn around, babys head is well and truly wedged up in my ribcage. It is a big baby, 99th centile for basically every measurement (head size, femur length, weight, etc) - I don't have GD but they keep asking me if I'm sure I've had the GTT and it was normal (it was!), growth scans are putting baby something like 3-4 weeks ahead of due date based on size (not super accurate I know). Part of me just wants to go fuck it, don't even bother with an ECV and just go straight for a planned c section. Mostly because baby is measuring so big I'm convinced even if it did move, it'd just end up being some horrible forceps/instrumental delivery anyway. Feel like I'd rather come to terms with a planned c section and mentally prepare myself for that & the associated recovery, than attempt a vaginal birth with giant-head baby and end up with some horrible birth injuries as a result. I have a lot of support PP if I did have a c section, so although I'm certain it wouldn't be enjoyable, I have DH at home with me for 6 weeks + if needed, DM could come and stay with us. Also have lovely in laws very close by as well, so lots of support etc.

Opinions?? Should I just decline the ECV and say please book me in for a scheduled c section thanks. I'm absolutely certain baby isn't going to move on its own because of its size (but hey if it does I guess then the decision has been made for me 🤷‍♀️)

I think your logic is very sound and in your shoes I would go straight to the section. I was at the 98th percentile with DD (just based on fundal height though) and also had the "....did you get tested for gestational diabetes?" at my 38w appointment, so understand the anxiety. She turned out to be a v average 8lb after an EMCS but I appreciate this is less likely for you due to scans. DD was in a very poor position and back to back. Recovery etc. was fine, and believe me I am a very bad patient.

I am currently 32w with no. 2 and am on the other side of the scale- he's breach and measuring between the 5th and 10th percentile, weekly scans, all that jazz. I do want a section this time but have actually been told that if I did want to try for a VBAC they wouldn't 'allow' me to have a ECV because there's a chance baby wouldn't tolerate it, smaller babies often don't. I'd heard the procedure is fairly brutal before but hearing that just put me right off.

Some people really want to have the experience of labour which is fair enough, but if deep down you're pretty 'meh' about it I would go for the planned CS and enjoy the benefits like not going overdue, having a date, planning help/DH's leave etc.

Such a difficult decision to make. Breech babies are very capable of being delivered vaginally in the right hands - it seems that healthcare providers get very nervous about those. Also, scans can be wrong. I was listening to a podcast about how sizing via scans are right only about half of the time. (check out evidencebasedbirth.com)
You may not want to take the risk of any complications like you say, so i see why youd want a c section but that comes with risks too. Good luck, i am sure you will make the right decision, just make sure it's informed

My friends that have had planned c-sections have coped much better mentally than those who have had emergency c-sections. Pretty much all my friends who had emergency c-sections felt (still feel in some cases) like a failure and some have really suffered with PND and I think that feeling of failure didn’t help. The planned c-sections also seemed to recover physically quicker, I think because they were able to get things in place to help them such as changing tables at the right height, nappy caddies, pillows to support them, something to help them out of bed.

I’m 36weeks with a breech baby.

Re: ECV I plan to decline - they have a 40-50% success rate and baby can still turn afterwards. My baby is very high so when midwife tries to feel my stomach I find that uncomfortable so I’m assuming an ECV would be painful. I’m going for an elective caesarean

Skip the ECV and go for the section honestly.
As PP said even if they can turn baby no guarantee they won't turn back. I've never liked the risks of an ECV. Good luck whatever you decide