Advice please.

[Wynterbab]

Hi i would love some advice.
I was with my partner for 5 years and recently found out he cheated on me and got someone else pregnant. I was devastated to say the least but have broken all contact after hearing his side of the story.
I have now found out that I am pregnant which I didn't know when we broke all contact.
I am feeling so conlicted about the pregnancy and how things stand. The last time we spoke it wasnt a pleasant conversation from his side.
Do I contact him, do I not continue with the pregnancy.
I am just so so confused and cant think straight right now.
Any advice would be great. Thank you

Hugs, I'd suggest you posts I'm the relationship board for more traffic!

What a horrible situation 😞

Personally, I think I'd be coming at this from the perspective of, you know the relationship is over. You ended it for a good reason and you sound well rid of him! So what you need to decide first about baby is whether you want to/can go it alone. Taking him out of the equation, would you want this baby? Once you've made that decision, and if you want to keep it, then you have a decision regarding what your expectations of him are in terms of involvement etc. You can then inform him of the situation and lay out exactly what your expectations are ("I don't want you back but you have a right to know that the child is yours and if you will want some time with them etc when they are here then we can discuss that" "I will be claiming child support" etc) ...

It's alt to deal with just as you're dealing with his shitty behaviour - really hope things pick up for you soon.

Thank you
I will do

Thank you @SnookyPook I will definitely take your advice on how I look at things. And work it out that way.

I'm sure it will all work out for you one way or another. It's one of those things you will be looking back on in the future and it will all make absolute sense. It's just horrible when you're right in the middle of it. You've got this though. X

Thank you so much @SnookyPook it really is appreciated. x

I'd not tell him, certainly at this point. Give yourself time to process everything. As others said, make your decision on your own, and whether you want to raise a child alone. And remember this, you do not owe him a thing, he certainly doesn't have a right to know at the moment (it is your body and not his). Whether you terminate or continue, he does not get any say in the matter.

If you do go ahead, some people will say he has a right to know and others will disagree (as I do). You could tell him during pregnancy, after the birth, or never. And you do not have to decide this part now, first of all think about yourself.

@Froooty thank you, you are right I need to not even wonder what he would say and think about it purely from my perspective and if I can handle bringing up a child alone.
Its so much has happened in such a short time, my brain feels so scrambled. Thank you for your advice. I appreciate it