Pregnant and anxious of upcoming events

[OverdueFirstTimeMama]

I'm looking for some advice please 🙏🏼

I’ve recently found out I am pregnant and I am going to be a bridesmaid before I am 12 weeks. I don’t want to tell the bride as I don’t want to take any shine off of her special day but I am so anxious about fake drinking and people sussing me out on the day 😣🙈

If I was a day guest I think this would be ok but as I am a bridesmaid I have toasts in the morning as we are getting ready, drinks the evening before and in the run up and I don’t have a clue how I am going to hide not drinking. I absolutely cannot say I am not drinking because everyone will know as I would always get involved with having a celebration.

does anyone have any advice please? It is all I can think about ahhh

If you a bridesmaid I would assume you are pretty close. Personally I’d tell her so she can help ensure you subtlety don’t get given alcohol. Telling her in advance won’t take the shine of her day but leaving it for everyone to suss out on the day might upset her.

@Twoinapod the last thing I would ever want to do is upset her so maybe you are right and I should tell her in advance. Thank you for replying x

I don't think telling the bride in confidence before the day would take the shine off at all. Presumably you're close, she'll be happy for you, and do what she can to sneak you some nosecco or something instead of alcohol.

I’d either tell her in advance or tell someone at the bar. You can take a real glass of Prosecco for the toasts and just put it up to your lips and pretend to drink it. Honestly other people really don’t notice what you’re doing as much as you think. Say something on the morning like you’ve got a tummy bug and you’re going to take it easy with the drinking so that gets you out of drinks at night and if someone at the bar knows you could even hand in a bottle of nosecco when you arrive and have them fill it up with that or appletiser

Also I was pregnant and not telling anyone at a night out at Christmas. I was so paranoid about not letting anyone suss me out that it completely went over my head that my friend was playing the exact same game! She had pre drinks at hers and made a point of ‘drinking’ at that so you could take charge of the drinks while getting ready. She then announced when we got out for drinks that she wasn’t going to drink anymore and made some excuse. I didn’t even for a second suspect anything as I’d already seen her drinking. I’d just act like you’ve drank too much earlier on in the day and say you’re going to take it easy and pace yourself. Conveniently every time you have an alcoholic drink itl be when you get it yourself

Thank you everyone for your advice! X