Pregnant with no3 and freaking out

[ConfusedMumma87]

Hi. I'm new here. I'm a mum of 2 a boy and girl aged 4 and 2. And for ever such a long time I've contemplated a third. I'm one of 4 and always wanted 4. Anyway long story short I wanted another so one of them has a same sex sibling. And now I'm pregnant. I had a MC before this and when I found out o freaked out but I put it down to hormones as I was actually already MC. But this time I'm not and now I am genuinely freaking out. What have I done?! I have two perfectly healthy kids. I have my life back I'm enjoying life and now I've thrown it all up in the air. Im 35 36 soon and I don't know im having a panic attack. And yes I thought about this all before trying but I could never make my mind up and thought after someone said it's better to not live with regret of not trying as you'll never regret the baby once it's here. Anyone else totally freak out when they found out they were pregnant with no3?!

honestly going for a scan today as have had cramping and so they are checking it's ok but honestly when will I feel happy about this?!

Me! We discussed a third and I had coil removed as it didn’t agree with me. Assumed it would take ages to conceive so we’d have time to weigh up but caught first cycle. I have a pre teen who is being a bit of a nightmare and a toddler who isn’t sleeping well and now I’m totally panicking about how we’ll cope. I’ve also been incredibly anxious this time and tested a lot, I’ve only done one or two tests with my previous babies. I’m booking an early scan at 8 weeks to check everything is ok. I’m struggling to feel excited and really don’t want to tell anyone.

Oh man I'm exactly the same. I don't want to tell anyone. I can't work out if it's because I don't want them to be excited and I'm not or because they are going to judge me for having 3. I have tested so much I think because oh a reason it's not ok to think. I was so happy with my first two and I did want this but now I'm thinking maybe I didn't and I just thought I did. Off to my scan to check it's ok in 20mins and I feel sick. How far are you? Early days? x

@ConfusedMumma87 i think people are definitely going to be judgey when I tell them. I have no idea why I think that as I know lots of people with 3 and I’ve never been anything other than happy for them. I think 2 seemed nice and even and now 3 is chucking the balance off. Don’t get me wrong this baby will be so loved but this definitely seems like the biggest jump and I’m so much more nervous. I’ve got 2 lovely children and I’m risking it by having another. Also I have two girls so I know I’m going to have loads of comments about trying for a boy which isn’t the case at all.

I’ll be 7 weeks on Thursday so still fairly early. I’m booking a scan for next Friday so I’ll be 8 weeks. Then planning on telling my parent on Mother’s Day. I’m really close with my mum and I’ve always told her as soon as I found out so it’s weird keeping it a secret. Really anxious about telling her even though she’s joked about me having another so I know she’d be fine about it.

How far along are you? I hope all goes well with your scan.

@ConfusedMumma87 how did you get on with your scan?

Hey. They saw a sac but nothing else I have to wait till Friday this week to go back. I think I'm even more confused now than I was back then. Keep googling 'people with 3 kids' hoping I'll find the answer 🤦🏻‍♀️ how are you getting ok? x

@ConfusedMumma87 how many weeks are you? I have a scan booked for Saturday morning. I’ll be 8 weeks but I’m so stressed that something is wrong. I feel like I just can’t get excited this time

I was only 5 weeks when I did the last scan I'll be 6 weeks this Friday. Good luck for Saturday. Is this first scan? x

How are you going? I'm 8 weeks and had a scan and saw baby. But now freaking out as my symptoms have stopped. Amazing how you can go from feeling one way about a pregnancy to another way! Hope your ok x

It's very normal for symptoms to stop from 8-12 weeks because the placenta will be taking over around then.

Is your next scan the 12 week dating scan?

I'm in a sort of similar position but going from 1 to 2 rather than 2 to 3, she's very much wanted and I'm excited and really want DD to have a sibling but several times a day I suddenly think what the hell am I doing this is a terrible idea, and I'm 26 weeks now 😆

Oh I did the same when I went from 1 to 2! But honestly the actual best thing that has ever happened. They are 4 and 2 now and just melts my heart how much they love each other so much. Oh I didn't know about that and 8 weeks. With my first 2 I was nauseous till about 12-14 weeks. I had a MC before this pregnancy and I was very symptomatic and then it just stopped and I lost it. So freaking out x

@ConfusedMumma87 I’ll be 11 weeks on Thursday. I had a scare at 9 weeks, had a small bleed, went to EPAU. I went from stressing how we’d cope with another to all I cared about was this little one being ok. Thankfully all was well. I have my 12 week scan next Thursday bang on 12 weeks. So looking forward to reaching that milestone. It’s completely changed how I’m feeling about this baby now and I know we’ll manage.

I've just tested positive with number 3. I think. Very faint.
Completely freaking out and feeling terrified.

Awww welcome to the club! I don't have the answers you're looking for but someone said to me you'll live to regret not having one but you'll never regret the child you have. And that's what helped me make peace with my decision. I hope you can find clarity in whatever you choose it is a minefield. I spent the first 4 weeks every single minute of every day trying to convince myself. It was torture but here I am going for it. Sending you lots of love xxx

Congratulations!! I remember feeling the same, it's hard work but 3 are a beautiful gift. I had one of each and 3rd was a boy but both boys are very different characters. When they get a bit older they amuse each other so don't always feel the need for play dates galore! They squabble a bit but are a tight bunch - youngest now 10 and as heard and seen it all at times so seems more mature than his friends who don't have older siblings. There were times when I semi - regretted it, I won't lie BUT he's a total blessing and the glue that keeps the others together. I was one of 2 and have no real relationship with my sibling as we are so different, which is sad, I often felt that if there had been 3 of us we may have all stayed closer?! Who knows? But I'm really happy we have such a lively home. Enjoy 😊

Not sure if it might have been a false alarm? Testing again with a different brand tomorrow.

Funny, now I feel a bit disappointed if it's not.

Hey. Sorry I never replied. How did you get on? xxx

Thank you 😘😘😘

Can I piggy back in on this?
im 36, mum of 2 girls (4+2), and I think I’m preg with no 3’ 😳😳😳! Like you guys said, I’m freaking out. I feel like we’re gettnf into a rhythm and we can handle most days, but 3 seems overwhelming. But of course we’d love the baby but it just feels like a big life change, more so than 1-2. I’ll have to teat in a week, but I think I’ve had implantation bleeding yesterday, and I’m SO tired and terrible headaches and vivid dreams. I’m hoping it’s not Twins as DH had 2x sets of twins on his side. I’m only 7dpo - (we dtd) right at the end of my ovulation it seems. I’m worried that my symptoms are strong for only 7 days 🫣🫣