Am I being stupid? 26 and pregnant

[KellyM1998]

26
been with partner 8 years
brought house together
both have secure jobs
-if you knew the above about someone would you be asking if their pregnancy was ‘planned’ ?

I told my friends today and I’ve been asked by one if the pregnancy was planned..
im not going to lie, it’s hurt a bit…
am I being stupid? Is 26 really too young to be pregnant nowadays???

I wouldn't think too much if it. It's a bit rude but probably just comes from a place of ignorance.
I'm 35 and am often asked by friends how long we tried for our baby (newly married when I got pregnant and had her when I was 30). She was a total "accident"! 😂

I'm 30, married, both DH and I are in steady jobs etc.

Someone asked me this. For them, it was a way of assessing what support I wanted from them. Was I asking them to be happy and excited or was I wanting reassurance and for them to help me make a difficult decision.

I mean yes, when you think too much about it, it is a very personal and somewhat invasive question but most people just want to support you.

As someone who has asked close friends this question even thought they’re mid 30s, it’s really not meant to imply anything it’s just a way of making conversation, there shouldn’t be any stigma around an “unplanned” pregnancy anyway, it’s just another part of your story and is something to chat about with a close friend, how they feel about the pregnancy and whether it was a happy shock/shock shock/much wished for and monitored occasion

Although in my defence I think I worded it as “have you been trying?!” And only to a close friend!

I'd probably assume it was unplanned if my close friend announced and hadn't told me that they were trying, but within our group of friends we're always open with each other about TTC!

I am 35 (married/all the rest of it) and pregnant with my fourth, and people still ask me this! In fact people have asked this with all of my children. I don't even think they care... I think it's just something people say without really thinking. Something I'd never ask but folk can be weird.

26 isn’t too young but even if it was, if you and your partner are ready that’s all that matters.
I’m 31 and the first in my friend group to have a baby, I got a few people asking if it was planned too. I think a lot of people without kids don’t know what else to say to try to engage with you around pregnancy. One of my closest friends asked me how many times we were having sex to get pregnant ??? She’s not asked how I am throughout my entire pregnancy or mentioned it since, some people can just be a bit weird but don’t take it personally. Congratulations btw

I'm also a 26 year old homeowner who has been with their partner for 8 years (got married in 2021).... It does seem like an odd question to be honest! None of my friends are married or have kids, but it's all their personal choice and no-one has asked me if ours is planned or not!

26 is younger than average, I think average first time mums are about 30 these days? But it's certainly not so young I'd be asking questions.

I think people just ask purely out of being nosy, but not because they don't think it's the right decision.

Just to put your mind at ease I'm 27 and due with baby number 2 any day now! Got our first house in 2016 and married in 2019. We had our first when I was 25 in 2020 (My husbands 6 years older). No one has ever commented about my age and I'm so glad we had our first when we did!

I think stability is much more important than age! x

I think it's just a general question some people ask, I had a couple (it didn't offend me though, so maybe I'd think different if it did!)
We're married and had been together 12 years with our own house - gave birth at 28!

@KellyM1998 I was asked this question recently! I'm 36 and have been with partner ten years, we own our own home and have been happily married for 5 years 😂 people are strange!!! X