Pregnant whilst waiting for fertility referral

[rosalue]

Does anyone know what normally happens in this situation?

DH and I have been TTC for about 1.5 years. We had just completed our tests for referral to fertility a couple of weeks ago (issues on both sides) when I found out I was pregnant.

I told my GP and they said their recommendation would be to go through with the referral just in case, whilst giving times for things to advance. We agreed, expecting it would take a while but I have just been offered an appointment for this week when I will be just 6-7 weeks pregnant.

What is the right thing to do here? I don't want to mess anyone around - my initial reaction was just to be honest and ask if I can check in with them again when things are more advanced, but if the worst happens will they expect us to give it another couple of years of trying again before we can go back on the list?

It came up in conversation with a
consultant today in the EPU and they said to try to stay on the fertility list as long as possible and not say anything. They said you don't need a reason to postpone an appointment. A colleague was nodding in agreement as we spoke.

Sorry - I appreciate this is a very sensitive topic and really hope it does not upset anyone. Thank you for any thoughts 💐

No experience but if that were me i would definitely try and postpone until the new year and hope your next appointment comes through for after your 12 week scan.

I would postpone as well until 12 weeks

I expect you can postpone your first appointment by a few weeks without too many questions. And by then hopefully you will be more confident in your pregnancy.

Honestly id postpone. In my area a miscarriage resets your clock eg you would wait another year for help

100% postpone until after the 12 week scan if you can.

@rosalue This happened to me recently.
I ended up telling the fertility department that I was pregnant and asked if I had another miscarriage (I had a MMC this time last year) could I revert back on this fertility referral and avoid having to wait again. Unfortunately they kindly advised me I couldn't.

I'm almost 17 weeks now and hoping all will be ok in this pregnancy. I agree with pp to try and postpone if you can - I had my appt set for Feb 2023 and post my 12w scan thought it would be the right thing to cancel - although I did try the above first!

Wishing you the best luck for you pregnancy x

Thank you all - I really appreciate it.

If having a miscarriage is enough to be taken off the list, would there still be a benefit to the postponed appointment? Is it that my GP wouldn’t be allowed to refer me again in the event of a miscarriage but fertility might still be willing to speak to me and help if I’m already on the list?

I work within a fertility service.

If you've been seen in the EPU it's likely that they may realise you are pregnant and cancel your appointment beforehand and quite possibly discharge you. So I would preempt this and call to rebook for few months time (policy states you can do this once without being discharged, if you're talking NHS), you don't need to go into details of why.

Just remember to ring in and cancel if you don't need the appointment in a few months time; we get a higher number of patients not turning up for fertility appointments than in any other Gynae service. So frustrating when waiting lists are so long!

Thank you, @MO22 - that is very helpful (although I’m so sorry you went through it). Wishing you all the very best for the rest of your pregnancy 💐

And thanks so much @cowbag1. I will try that tomorrow. The only unfortunate thing is that when they called to tell me about the appointment they said they had me down as a “did not show” for a previous one. I’ve never had any others as the referral was just a couple of weeks ago - wondering if maybe there was a letter in the post that didn’t come or they are thinking of someone else? Anyway - I explained that on the phone but hopefully that doesn’t already go down as a deferral.

We've seen a lot of patients not receiving letters lately so an understanding admin person should hopefully let you defer for a little while without too much bother.

@rosalue just one last thing on your point re miscarriage. Unfortunately in my experience @IWillBeWaxingAnOwl is right and a miscarriage resets the clock for another year. However I got my fertility referral 7 months after trying again after speaking to a sympathetic NHS gynaecologist - I did not have age on my side (35) and also have PCOS and a Thyroid problem so with the miscarriage she kindly "bumped" me up the queue so to speak - it would have been a year by the time I was seen, but just something else to consider that you can be seen faster sometimes. Hopefully information you won't need anyway.

Firstly Congratulations! It's the scariest thing ever seeing that test when going through infertility!

We tried for 2 years and 10 months before my BFP, I must have been around 5 days pregnant when we went to our final hurdle meeting for IVF to set out meds dates etc! It was crazy amazing timing. I was so overwhelmed I don't think it hit me until I actually rang them to tell them I was pregnant - that was the first time I cried since the the BFP! Lol!

The nurse was SO kind on the phone, and just said that now you have been referred to us, should everything not go as planned you are already on our books as such - which was a relief if not terrifying too!

I now have the most amazing 8 month old little boy! I wish you all the luck! It's the best!

Hi @rosalue congratulations!
I have a similar experience, although with some differences to what other people have mentioned so it may depend on the guidelines in your area.
I was referred for fertility treatment in March due to my age (40) after 8 months. I didn’t realise but the waiting list was 35 weeks. I fell pregnant one month later but miscarried, and didn’t specifically tell the fertility clinic. But when they phoned me in August I told them and they said I was still on the list with about 12 weeks left to wait.
I had my consultation in November and was told I could start fertility treatment early 2023. I then found out I was pregnant 1 week later.
I haven’t told the fertility clinic yet, I was going to wait and see if everything was ok at 12 weeks. Fortunately they haven’t contacted me yet to arrange any appointments.
Also to mention that during the consultation the fertility clinic could not even see the fertility test results that I had done in preparation at the GP, so I think the chances of them seeing I am pregnant without me telling them are slim. Yours and @cowbag1 s may be more on the ball though, and they clearly don’t have as long a waiting list as mine!
So I agree with the others in postponing the appt until after the 12 week scan. It looks from what others say a miscarriage could reset the dates, but you never know it might not do.

I am on the waiting list for fertility treatment. I had a ectopic pregnancy in march and mines hasn't been reset... (although I did need to wait 6 months before I could try again due to the drug I had to treatment the ectopic)

wonder if it is different for different areas!

Also I was treated at a different hospital for my ectopic and the fertility hospital had no clue about it until I informed them months later 😵‍💫

Update: I'm very grateful for a lot of things to do with our healthcare but the communication is crap.

After managing to move the fertility appointment to a week and a half after my scan, I thought - great, that makes sense. Fast forward to the scan approaching and I get a text at midnight on a Friday saying it's been cancelled and brought forward (before the scan).

I phone up outpatients and get it moved back to after the scan (only a couple of days - the latest they would do).

Now today get a Badger Notes (i.e. NHS pregnancy app) notification saying the appointment has been cancelled and moved forward to the morning on the day of the scan.

If they know I'm pregnant could someone please not just call me up to speak about it rather than the merry dance of cancelling and rescheduling appointments? I'm feeling really anxious about bad news at the scan so there is no point talking fertility (or telling me I'm discharged) an hour before it.