Boyfriend problem! I am stupid staying.

[Anonymous44]

Please help. I am having a rough pregnancy with hyperemisis and haven’t been able to drive to work. My boyfriend told me an hour before my shift ended he couldn’t pick me up as he was ”not feeling great” and wanted to be well for his Christmas doo tomorrow. Luckily my dad was free to pick me up but it takes an hour to get to my work so I had to wait around a while.
in the evening I felt reduced movements of the baby so went to hospital to get checked out. I was so worried and an emotional mess. My mum took me to hospital and I called my Boyfriend on the way. He didn’t come and help, instead he slept. It took 5 hours at the hospital and I didn’t get home till 11pm all while my boyfriend was sleeping. He obviously was t worried like me as I couldn’t have slept. He doesn’t care about me or the baby. I feel like I should walk away or am I being too over dramatic.

Is this a new trait? Have you previously had doubts about him? If so, it would be easier if you did this alone and with the help from your family.

He sounds absolutely useless. If he can't help you when you're pregnant then he certainly won't be helping you when the baby is born. Look ahead and start to make plans. I'm so sorry, he's just sounds awful.

If he doesn’t care about you or the baby then it’s sensible to break up. Can you stay with your parents?

You’re not being overly dramatic at all.
I’d sit down and have a serious conversation with him. How old is he OP? It sounds like a fairly immature response from someone who isn’t taking the upcoming responsibility of becoming a dad particularly seriously, or having any consideration of just how awful hyperemesis can be. He may not even realise how insensitive he’s been. If it was me, I’d explain why it was such a massive issue, explain what my expectations of him were moving forward, and give him a chance to sort himself out. If he didn’t, I’d be out of there!

hope you’re ok x

Thank you for your replies. I have had doubts throughout pregnancy but put them to the back of my mind as want the baby to have a mum and dad but this I think is the last straw. He doesn’t take the whole baby thing seriously. He has really hurt me. How can he sleep when he doesn’t know if our baby is ok?! He obviously doesn’t care about me and the baby.

He sounds very immature. How old are you both and how long have you been together?

I'm not sure I'd have been on board with having a baby with him in the first place if this is what he's generally like.

How long have you been together? How old is he?

He doesn't sound invested in the baby at all. I couldn't be around someone knowing I am in hospital and he is getting some sleep so he can be fresh for a party.

He doesn't doubt invested. Also your parents seem to bail you out a lot, are you used to a lot of support? Does he take a big step back because your mum and dad are always there for you?
If this is the tip of the iceberg and there's more issues then perhaps it's time to rethink

Did he want the baby?

The question has to be asked why you decided to have a baby with him in the first place? Clearly you don't live together so not in a committed stable relationship?

The baby will have a mum and dad, you just won’t be together.
Sounds like you have supportive parents so you will be fine to do this without him.
If you go on to have other children I do suggest you make a better choice about the father next time

I think you need to be honest with yourself, your DP doesn't seem able to care about you or the baby to a level I would consider normal or adequate. Really sorry

Can you move elsewhere?

Walk away.
Why stay for more pain?
Will your parents help you?
When he wants to be involved with the baby, don't take any nonsense, do it on your terms.
You've already shown excellent judgement. Stay strong.